ASF joke thread

[dutchie]

So it appears that you can have political threads and you can have joke threads but you can't have a joke in a political thread nor politics in a joke thread.
Now that's funny.

 

[Joe Blow]

So it appears that you can have political threads and you can have joke threads but you can't have a joke in a political thread nor politics in a joke thread.

That's correct. I'm sure I'm not the only one who is tired of political point scoring and agenda pushing in threads that aren't about politics.

 

[basilio]

So it appears that you can have political threads and you can have joke threads but you can't have a joke in a political thread nor politics in a joke thread.
Now that's funny.

Which is why, of course, there is thread called "political satire" where one can conveniently marry politics and funnies.

 

[dutchie]

BREAKING: Husband Wins Argument -- UPDATE: Nope Never Mind
February 16th, 2021

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CANTON, MI—In a stunning development, local man Anthony Larson actually managed to win an argument with his wife just moments ago.

The incident is being hailed as a giant leap for all of husbandkind. Larson unleashed a series of convincing, unassailable, undebunkable arguments that his wife, Amy, had no response for.
After slamming her with argument after argument, she got quieter and quieter, strengthening Larson's resolve to finish her off with a devastating logical deathblow.
He says he finally knew he won when she said, "Fine. You're right. You win."
UPDATE: NOPE, NEVER MIND. New updates are coming in, and it appears that despite initial reports, Larson did not win the argument AT ALL and in fact is in HUGE TROUBLE. We apologize for the error.

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

Easter is coming. Always time for Easter Bunny jokes - particularly from a smart alec 3 year old

 

[bellenuit]

On Twitter....

 

[basilio]

Another funny Bud Light commerical.

How to make a clothing drive really zip.

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

One for the toolies on ASF.

 

[Craton]

A fellow walked into a doctor’s office and the receptionist asked him what he had.
“Shingles,” he said.
She took down his name, address, Medicare number and told him to have a seat. A few minutes later, a nurse's aide came out and asked him what he had.
“Shingles,” he said.
She took down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told him to wait in the examining room.
Ten minutes later, a nurse came in and asked him what he had.
He said, “Shingles.”
She gave him a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, told him to take off all his clothes and to wait for the doctor.
Fifteen minutes later the doctor came in and asked him what he had.
“Shingles,” he said.
“Where?” said the doctor.
And the bloke replied, “Outside, in the truck. Where do you want them?”

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

Funny ? Or desperately sad...

 

[basilio]

Funny ? Or desperately sad...

View attachment 125332

It was, in fact, a clever joke by Ruthe.
Unfortunately that didn't stop some nasty trolls becoming totally toxic.

Ruthe Phoenix on Twitter: "Took the batteries out of the carbon ...​

twitter.com › ruthephoenix › status


6 Dec 2015 — Took the batteries out of the carbon monoxide alarm because the loud beeping was giving me a headache and making me feel sick and dizzy. 11 ...

Ruthe Phoenix on Twitter: "Because of my carbon monoxide ...​

twitter.com › ruthephoenix › status


18 July 2016 — @RuthePhoenix. Ruthe, you're a psycho. - Graham Linehan (creator of Father Ted and a world of abuse against trans children) (She/Her).

 

[basilio]

 

[basilio]

Couldn't resist sharing this one..