Prenuptial agreements

[Green08]

Affair for 2 years. Yes I did know of that. Live in affair is my understanding. If seperate address and 2 years could be interesting to prove.

Lover or mistress for 2 years in affair unknown to others Same rights I would give them. Principle of the relationship is understood and relatively basic. Hush money.

Wonder what the real cost to Richard Pratt was?

I am not condoning what he did - he is a human and what happened in that affair happened. His wife to save face or tighten the finanical screws on him stayed - scary one when I saw her no grace, mutton as lamb with that shocking severe badly coloured hair style . Was he a pussy for not making a choice - yes but humans generally are when money is involved.

 

[Mr J]

If you need this you have chosen a partner on the wrong premise.

I am not a female, I am reasonably well off and I would never consider this as a control measure in a relationship. All a part of the reason the treasure, which is marriage and family, has broken down over time and along with it basic social values such as respect for each other and especially our elders.

What a load of rubbish. It's like placing a trade without a stop. You may have the best of intentions and genuinely believe that it will work out, but little is certain in life, and relationships are not one of those. People change, people's feelings change, and relationships change. What may be a perfect partner in the present may not be perfect down the road.

People always moan about society's slipping values. They've been moaning about it for thousands of years.

Edit, I see you have been married for 31 years. That's great, but many will never last. It isn't necessarily because they chose the wrong partner, and even if they did they probably could not have known.

The point I am making is know who you are getting into a relationship with and then commit to it. Don't be so quick to jump into a relationship and then cry foul through your own lack of foresight or commitment.

You can't know someone completely, as we never know what anyone is capable of. Then throw in the fact that people can change. Stick it out and work through problems? Sorry for another trading analogy, but I think it's appropriate. If a trade starts going downhill, you cut your losses and learn from the experience. You don't hang in there hoping that it turns around, because it could get very messy.

 

[jono1887]

What a load of rubbish. It's like placing a trade without a stop. You may have the best of intentions and genuinely believe that it will work out, but little is certain in life, and relationships are not one of those. People change, people's feelings change, and relationships change. What may be a perfect partner in the present may not be perfect down the road.

People always moan about society's slipping values. They've been moaning about it for thousands of years.

Edit, I see you have been married for 31 years. That's great, but many will never last. It isn't necessarily because they chose the wrong partner, and even if they did they probably could not have known.



You can't know someone completely, as we never know what anyone is capable of. Then throw in the fact that people can change. Stick it out and work through problems? Sorry for another trading analogy, but I think it's appropriate. If a trade starts going downhill, you cut your losses and learn from the experience. You don't hang in there hoping that it turns around, because it could get very messy.

Hahaha... i love the trading analogies. But i really dont think they're appropriate for a relationship. I'm sure your partner would be to pleased to have your marriage likened to a simple stock trade :

 

[beerwm]

anyone proposed a pre-nup to your partner?

how did it go, haha :

 

[Mr J]

Hahaha... i love the trading analogies. But i really dont think they're appropriate for a relationship. I'm sure your partner would be to pleased to have your marriage likened to a simple stock trade :

True, but the fact is that we're making an emotional decision, and we all know how flawed those can be. Given the significance of the event, shouldn't we all be more grounded about it and the potential outcomes? Or is that not romantic? :

I wouldn't know how to bring it up. "Honey, I'd like to make plans in case we break up". At least that is how it might sound. Ideally the girl would know how crazy I am about her and know the pre-nup doesn't say anything negative about the relationship, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

 

[jono1887]

True, but the fact is that we're making an emotional decision, and we all know how flawed those can be. Given the significance of the event, shouldn't we all be more grounded about it and the potential outcomes? Or is that not romantic? :

I wouldn't know how to bring it up. "Honey, I'd like to make plans in case we break up". At least that is how it might sound. Ideally the girl would know how crazy I am about her and know the pre-nup doesn't say anything negative about the relationship, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

Isn't life all about emotional decisions... we are human beings. All our decisions are based on emotions, even if we try to block them our or remain objective there will always be emotions.

How does a prenup work anyway? does it only protect the assets you have before you are married?

Say i have 10M before we are married. But during our 10yr marriage, I accumulate anoter 90M bringing it to a total of 100M. is only that initial 10M protected and the 90 is split or does she get nothing?

 

[Green08]

The rich one wants the prenup. They both agree both happy. Now if the rich one loses every penny and the other partner who was the underdog financially has a huge success financially. Who gets what?

Assumption is normally that the wealthy partner will stay in that position and therefore protect the hard earned money. I can only imagine if the wealthy one come out with nothing, the resentment and disbelief.

My understanding is all in the clauses.

Life's a gamble, partnerships are a gamble, predicting human reaction a gamble. Faith and risk aversion don't always sit well with love.

 

[Tink]

I say ghotib's one sounds the best -- disaster plan

 

[Mr J]

Isn't life all about emotional decisions... we are human beings. All our decisions are based on emotions, even if we try to block them our or remain objective there will always be emotions.

How does a prenup work anyway? does it only protect the assets you have before you are married?

Say i have 10M before we are married. But during our 10yr marriage, I accumulate anoter 90M bringing it to a total of 100M. is only that initial 10M protected and the 90 is split or does she get nothing?

Life is full of emotions, but I don't think it's correct to say that they're emotional decisions, at least not for some. Emotions will always be an influence unless we are born missing some wiring, but that doesn't mean emotions have to control us. Emotions can certainly be brushed aside if we're conditioned for it. I don't think we're emotional creatures, I think for better and worse we just rarely develop past an emotional stage.

That's the idea, although I assume some contracts might go further. Divorce settlements can be a complete rort, and that's what I would be more worried about. Imagine that you bring in 80% of the income, and at the end of it you end up with just half, plus paying alimony and child support, and not to "normal" levels but to keep your beloved ex in the lifestyle they have become accustomed to? Ouch. There are better ways of dealing with this mess.

 

[Julia]

What a load of rubbish. It's like placing a trade without a stop. You may have the best of intentions and genuinely believe that it will work out, but little is certain in life, and relationships are not one of those. People change, people's feelings change, and relationships change. What may be a perfect partner in the present may not be perfect down the road.

People always moan about society's slipping values. They've been moaning about it for thousands of years.

Edit, I see you have been married for 31 years. That's great, but many will never last. It isn't necessarily because they chose the wrong partner, and even if they did they probably could not have known.



You can't know someone completely, as we never know what anyone is capable of. Then throw in the fact that people can change. Stick it out and work through problems? Sorry for another trading analogy, but I think it's appropriate. If a trade starts going downhill, you cut your losses and learn from the experience. You don't hang in there hoping that it turns around, because it could get very messy.

Couldn't agree more. Have twice lost money in marriage break up when I left.

That's the idea, although I assume some contracts might go further. Divorce settlements can be a complete rort, and that's what I would be more worried about. Imagine that you bring in 80% of the income, and at the end of it you end up with just half, plus paying alimony and child support, and not to "normal" levels but to keep your beloved ex in the lifestyle they have become accustomed to? Ouch. There are better ways of dealing with this mess.

Yep, quite true. I have a cousin who has never had a full time job. She's 44.
Her now ex-husband is a high earner. He moved out and their 18 year old daughter is with him. She has two teenage boys. She's living in a $2M house in very nice part of Sydney just paying very low repayments on remaining mortgage balance (almost paid off). She receives generous payments from her ex-husband plus government support. No interest in getting a job as long as the husband comes up with the goods.
She's off to Europe for a month in July courtesy of $6000 of the government stimulus payments. Way to go, huh!