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Billiant stuff. A man of my ilk. Obviously 2 direct hits.Believe me, it's the only thing they respond to. The scum know the legal system ridiculously well. Most of them are already semi-trained paralegals.
The last problem ones we had were with dogs. Bit of context here: Our neighbours (lovely people) own a place about two doors up from us. Shithole of a place but was bought for the land to subdivide it. Just renting it out in the meantime. But being a shithole, it's not the type of place a normal person would rent (or rent willingly).
Anyways, typical bogan scum dogs, they all look the same, they got out one day and attacked my father (on our property no less). After he fought them off I went over to attempt (attempt) a very polite chat to basically just say look, I've got two disabled parents and a toddler here, this can't happen again (they would have killed the toddler and possibly my mother too on the spot), this can't happen again. Made a very deliberate point of coming in from the front driveway, called out as I did it (politely), sleeves rolled up and hands out so I'm clearly not carrying a weapon, a game I know all too well.
I didn't even make it to the front door. The bitch (the woman, not the dog) comes out of the place storming. Screaming her head off, had grabbed a knife out of the block on the way out, came and got right in my face to let me know she had it, sprayed/half spat in my face, screaming to "get off her property", the works. Saying and doing the kinds of things that a normal person just doesn't say (or even know to say). CLEARLY not her first time, she knew exactly what she could and couldn't do and knew exactly what I could and couldn't do either.
However, this not being my first time either, I knew full well what was going on and what I was dealing with - I just stood my ground knowing full well she knew she'd never be able to argue that I was some kind of threat and the whole thing was just some absolute scum being absolute scum but once she'd given me the "get off my property" line I also did in fact have to leave, she couldn't argue it was a threat but legally speaking it does become trespassing. I gave her "I just want to talk, so you don't want to listen?", still got the same almost spit in the face/get off my property line, said "ok then", walked back home.
Reported the dogs to the council and the incident to the police, dog rangers showed up with a police escort no less, cops charged her with threatening with a deadly weapon (she denied everything but as the cops said, a magistrate would never believe her as this is a pretty ******* strange thing to make up and wouldn't you know it she already had a record, because of course she did), dogs got classified as dangerous, legally speaking it was a complete shitshow.
I head over to the neighbours and ask if they've had any problems, wouldn't you know it these dogs have been out before and my neighbour's daughter and her friend had had to climb on top of a rainwater tank to get away from them or god knows what would have happened, I mean gee, there's a history here and they're a real problem, how surprising.
I get chatting to the neighbour and we devise a plan because he was fed up with the scum as well.
The next day: Everyone stays indoors, we wait for the scum to leave their house, the neighbour goes over and undoes their gate and then legs it back to his place. The waiting game then begins.
All of about five minutes later the dogs were out and had made their way onto our property, which, with the history they had, meant they were now total fair game and so I was within my rights to (and I did) shoot the pair of them on the spot.
I call the cops, let them know what's happened, cops come over and see the animals and take a report from me but they let me know that legally speaking I'm completely in the clear, the bodies of the animals are taken over to the neighbour, she reacts in the exact way you'd expect, they let her know she doesn't have a leg to stand on (she wanted me charged, because of course she did), see you later.
This was all a couple of months ago and hilariously, they were evicted less than a week later (take one look at the state of the place and you'll be able to see why) and there's no forwarding address so they can't even find her to serve her for the court date.
Anyone that's dealt with these types (cops will tell you this) will tell you that it's actually the women that are the most aggressive. They think they're untouchable because they're female and so act accordingly. They'll try to claim intimidation if you inspect the property, they'll claim "Hurr he is big man and I was tiny scared woman" after they pull a knife on you like she did to me, they'll try to claim harassment, they'll play the damsel in distress card as casually as you make a coffee. You HAVE to deal with them in a particular way (make sure you get the legal paper trail started immediately before doing anything else) or you'll have problems like you cannot imagine.
Had the same sort of thing on the legal side. These types know the law inside out and usually better than the lawyers.
9k not trying to upstage you but this I have to tell you.
The scum we had unfortunately, had been living up north of us a bit. The Bailiff knew the family well. Were squating in an old house, strange that, on a few acres and the owner couldn't get them out.
Now this gengtleman owned a very large excavtor, and wanted to demolish this house to progress forward.
He thought around 2am in the morning would be a good time to do the demolishion work.
Out the scum scurred like rats from a sinking ship.
Apparaently the local boys in blue were all suffering eye sight and hearing problems when the scum fronted the cop shop that morning.
Then unfortunately for me they became my tenants from hell.