Chris Mainwaring Dead at 41

[Happy]

Maybe we should move our discussion forum to another thread?

 

[hangseng]

I just can't see an issue with that. It's hardly an unsympathetic statement...

It is a baseless statement as was the innuendo of Ben possibly being the one to supply Chris with drugs. The fact you can't see an issue with it is an problem in itself. I'm sorry but I can't support so called free speech with gilded statements purporting sympathy.

I have not seen one shred of factual evidence to support any of the negative comments posted.

The article from the Australian has already been slated in Perth as journalism in it's finest misrepresented form.

Want facts? Wait for the coroners findings and the final police report, not slate a person who can no longer defend himself and in the process spread unfounded rumours to the detriment of his family with cheap shots.

Sensitive? If caring is that, then yes I am and glad to be a contrarian regarding a lot of what has been stated here.

 

[explod]

Maybe we should move our discussion forum to another thread?

If we cant say what we like what is the point of the forums at all. Whether we agree or not with others, getting upset or oversensitive is not going to change anything.

 

[Happy]

If we cant say what we like what is the point of the forums at all. Whether we agree or not with others, getting upset or oversensitive is not going to change anything.

I said :

Maybe we should move our discussion forum to another thread?

This is only out of respect to person who died.

I did not say that we cannot pull out any dirt we like, but another thread would be probably more appropriate with different title.

Otherwise we can be seen as jumping up and down on somebody's grave.

Maybe it is only, who gets little uncomfortable with the title of our thread and subsequent direction thread took.

 

[explod]

I said :


This is only out of respect to person who died.

I did not say that we cannot pull out any dirt we like, but another thread would be probably more appropriate with different title.

Otherwise we can be seen as jumping up and down on somebody's grave.

Maybe it is only, who gets little uncomfortable with the title of our thread and subsequent direction thread took.

Acusations that we are jumping on peoples graves is rediculous and a bad slur. The thread maybe headed "Chris Mainwaring" but the discussions are about life itself. I have experienced death at close quarters on many occasions throughout my life and part of the process in coming to terms with its problems is open discussion. The idea of sssshhhhh is Victorian in nature and does not allow emotions to heal properly.

So get off you high horse as if you know everything and loosen up a bit.

 

[cuttlefish]

Are we sure he's actually dead? I heard someone saw him yesterday serving fish and chips in a takeaway in Kalgoorlie.


I wouldn't know how to take the press and public speculation if I was close to somone like Chris (and I don't follow AFL and didn't know of him). I can imagine it would be a very difficult thing to deal with - but its an inevitable occurrence for anyone thats lived in the public eye. I would hope that over time, once the initial dust has settled the real story of how he passed away and what sort of person he was will prevail over the short term speculation. People are more likely to believe the words of the people that knew him than idle speculation from journalists or strangers.

 

[Happy]

Acusations that we are jumping on peoples graves is rediculous and a bad slur. The thread maybe headed "Chris Mainwaring" but the discussions are about life itself. I have experienced death at close quarters on many occasions throughout my life and part of the process in coming to terms with its problems is open discussion. The idea of sssshhhhh is Victorian in nature and does not allow emotions to heal properly.

So get off you high horse as if you know everything and loosen up a bit.

Apologies, I did not want to disturb healing process.

 

[Kimosabi]

On news.com.au today, interesting perspective...

On sex, drugs and rotten role models

By Paul Kent
October 04, 2007 07:57am

HE was a father, a husband, a drug abuser and good-time charlie.

He was all of the above and the reason was simple. He was one of the boys.

If anyone is looking for an explanation for Chris Mainwaring's death, allegedly caused by drugs, it was because he was not just an ex-footballer; he was one of the boys.

A man who learned his life skills cocooned in the weird half-world where men are too often paid like men and treated like something more but so often allowed to act like boys.

They are indulged for as long as they keep producing on the football field.

One of the boys . . .

There is no greater endorsement in the changing room.

To be considered one of the boys grants you entry into the private world of orgies and drug binges.

Of footy molls on call for whenever one of the boys picks up the phone or perhaps the visiting team hits town or even if they happen to bump into them at the nightclub where they are often happy to offer their favours to boy-men who should know better.

If anybody has got any blow or Es to make it a real party, well, the boys are usually pretty happy about that, too. Such is the world in which they live.

Not all of the boys behave that way, let's make that point now but many more do than we are willing to admit.

Footballers nowadays exist in this strange half-world, stuck somewhere between adolescence and adulthood.

It is not unique to them but the difference between them and, say, actors and rock stars, is that they don't earn enough money to afford to totally shield themselves from Joe Public so, occasionally - but more and more frequently - their indiscretions break into the public domain.

Then the response is simple, always the same. The club closes ranks, blames the media.

The gullible football fan adopts the argument, saying whose business is it anyway?

They're role models, the media say, so they have a responsibility. You say they're role models, the clubs return fire, but every child's role model should be their parents, not these men.

It is a load of rubbish and a direct and often successful attempt to divert the argument away from the true problem.

First off, there should be a simple rule of thumb: you get asked to sign an autograph, you are a role model.

Kids don't ask their parents for autographs or stick posters of mum and dad on the wall.

Next off, it is time for clubs to take greater responsibility for the care of their players - and, most importantly, it must be overseen by the leagues they play in. The AFL and NRL must take responsibility for their athletes instead of leaving it, primarily, to the clubs to discipline their players.

The ARU has already begun down this road. It is not enough to let clubs oversee the disciplining of their players.

Clubs have a vested interest; primarily to keep their players happy to keep them performing at their peak on the weekend, because a winning clubs keeps everybody in a job.

Disciplining them according to society's standards detracts from that. The player can get upset with the club, no matter how misguided his hurt is.

So clubs invariably side with them, penalising them as little as is publicly acceptable.

This distorted treatment is why players are often genuinely confused when they get in public trouble.

They hate the media because they have often seen their team-mates do exactly the same without penalty but now they are being fined because the media made it public.

The rules change - and they can't understand why.

Clubs are taking players away from home younger and younger. Almost immediately these players are shown a world of privilege and uncommon freedom, nearly always before they have earned it.

Older players see this unearned privilege themselves - a young team-mate able to pick up a girl not because she fancies him but because she recognises the team badge on the shirt he is wearing.

What these young players are missing, and clubs are making no effort to teach, is life experience. They experience little of the struggle that develops most young men.

They go from zero to hero in one short step and too often, as we are seeing, they have trouble keeping speed.

Nice cars, no mortgage, girls on call, and nearly always somebody willing to hand over a tablet for nothing more than the privilege of hanging around.

It is not normal . . . unless you're one of the boys. So, when trouble looms, too often they are ill-equipped to handle it.

It is time to treat the cause and not the symptom.

The clubs, and the leagues, must be more answerable.

Chris Mainwaring is the tragic example of a man with too much privilege. A 41-year-old father, still hitting the drugs, enough to cost him his life.

He couldn't stop his lifestyle because it is what he has always known. You have to ask, where did it begin?

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,22529003-5007146,00.html

 

[hangseng]

Acusations that we are jumping on peoples graves is rediculous and a bad slur. The thread maybe headed "Chris Mainwaring" but the discussions are about life itself. I have experienced death at close quarters on many occasions throughout my life and part of the process in coming to terms with its problems is open discussion. The idea of sssshhhhh is Victorian in nature and does not allow emotions to heal properly.

So get off you high horse as if you know everything and loosen up a bit.

This thread is and has been in the main a direct afront to Chris, a deceased person, disrespectful in the extreme, regardless of what you or others may think. The young man is dead, have a little respect for his surviving family if nothing else.

If this thread was life in general I would not have taken the stand I have. This has become a very personal attack on a deceased person with wide spread inuendos and at times (as I have quoted) quite blatant speculation and mistruths. Widely regarded in society as in very poor taste and as "jumping on peoples graves".