# School Bullying



## DB008 (15 March 2011)

It seems that this is becoming more and more problematic in schools. A school yard fights has just been released and it is pretty dramatic. But, you be the judge.

Video of tables turning on bully sounds alarm bells 
(Violent vision of school yard bullying 

--WARNING--: distressing images. Video footage shows how bullying in the school yard can extend to cyberspace.)

http://www.smh.com.au/technology/technology-news/video-of-tables-turning-on-bully-sounds-alarm-bells-20110315-1bvmu.html



> It lasts just 41 seconds but is a distressing insight into schoolyard and cyber bullying in Sydney.
> 
> *A slightly-built 12-year-old Year 7 student antagonises a larger 16-year-old boy from Year 10, punching him in the face as a friend records it on his mobile phone and at least four other students watch.*
> 
> ...






> "I think it's great that he's standing up for himself. It just sucks that schools don't even try and stop bullying," said one. "This kid is my hero," said another.
> 
> *One said they knew the older boy personally and that he had been a victim for some time.
> 
> "I find it disgusting that he was suspended for it," they said. "I understand why he was but he still shouldn't [have] been."*




This video clearly shows the older "larger" boy copping a few hits to the head and then he snaps and does what he should do in a situation like this, fight back (IMO). He is now _suspended_. WTF? He's the victim, CLEARLY!!!!

Thoughts people????


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## adobee (15 March 2011)

Providing there was not reason for the initial punching (ie fatty didnt call the kids sister a fat cow) then skinny deserves the broken ankle in my opinion.. Pretty lucky for all parties he didnt end up with a broken neck !! The big dude needs to stop watching WWF and watch some Ali moves though..  one punch in the nose would have sorted that weed ..  

I dont know if bullying is getting worse but there always seems to be a few kids who are weird or loosers and a few kids who are bullies and pick on these softer kids till they snap.. I dont think thats anything new.. Alot of other kids feel bad but they do nothing as they dont want to get picked on themselves.. It takes a big man to stand up for someone else when your not involved...  

I imagine its awful for these kids knowing some jerk is going to pick on them or push them around or try to start a fight.. and worrying about this before they get to school..


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## poverty (15 March 2011)

Better version of the vid:

http://vimeo.com/21021823


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## Happy (15 March 2011)

We seem to have 2 Worlds:
Official with no bullying, no gangs, no violence, and on and on
Real World with bullying, violence, gangs and on and on.

I have no answer, actually I have, but is not palatable to do gooders turn the other cheek and the likes.

Just hope to stay out of attention of some monsters long enough to live to the end of my natural life.


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## Gringotts Bank (15 March 2011)

I hear the term do-gooder a lot on here.  What is it?


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## Happy (15 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> I hear the term do-gooder a lot on here.  What is it?




Yahoo search brought few links:
http://au.search.yahoo.com/search?p=do+gooder+definition&ei=utf-8&fr=b1ie7

Suppose there are better Search Engines


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## Julia (15 March 2011)

Bullying is a huge problem in schools.  It's much worse than a generation ago, aided by technology where cyber bullying spills over into the school environment the next day(s).

For several years I've been part of a mentoring program in both high schools and primary schools where we link up with 'at risk' students on a one-to-one basis.
These kids usually come from a disadvantaged background and often have learning difficulties as well.

Many of them are bullied.  Others are bullies themselves.  What we try to explain to them is that they need to walk away from potentially damaging situations.  We have limited success with this.

As an older generation we tend to think this should be easily solved, but sadly schoolground kid politics are vicious and determined.

I have seen a five year old pick up another kid his own age, lift him into the air and drop him onto the concrete.  He then proceeded to kick the downed kid in the head before staff could intervene.

The name calling and the obscene language has to be heard to be believed.
Some of these kids get it from their home environment and it's very hard for the school to stamp it out when the parent (usually single and on welfare) encourages the kid to fight and 'stand up for his rights'.

It's often really horrifying.  I cannot imagine who would choose a career in teaching these days.


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## GumbyLearner (15 March 2011)

DB008 said:


> It seems that this is becoming more and more problematic in schools. A school yard fights has just been released and it is pretty dramatic. But, you be the judge.
> 
> Video of tables turning on bully sounds alarm bells
> (Violent vision of school yard bullying
> ...




better view compared to the major newspapers. 

http://vimeo.com/21021823

If someone punched me in the face and the guts twice (4 direct hits) 
I would probably try to smash the aggressive moron too.
I certainly wouldn't give a flying **** about my teachers or the bullies parents either.
Especially, if they didn't have my back and/or wanted to stand up for/protect me in that kind of situation. 
There is only one direction when your put into a corner.


The State knows all well. AFTER THE EVENT! Real protectors! 

And his cowardly gang buddies stand around without throwing a punch. Three on one and the chubby picked on fella gets a suspension. YAWN! 

This is nothing new. 

I bow to every Australian P&C committee in the country. You know best! 

Here's a school hall. 

And not a blubbering apologist take-off involving that warm-hearted Julia. 

About 6 months before the Leave Julia alone by that unoriginal obese man.



Dumb as dog **** Australia version


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## ChaoSI (16 March 2011)

kid got what he deserved.

as for admin.. they of course had to suspend both...
imo... 'anti-bullying' campaigns are nice in theory... but are almost always doomed to fail.. it is an impossible thing to police and if you discover it .. then what?


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## GumbyLearner (16 March 2011)

ChaoSI said:


> kid got what he deserved.
> 
> as for admin.. they of course had to suspend both...
> imo... 'anti-bullying' campaigns are nice in theory... but are almost always doomed to fail.. it is an impossible thing to police and if you discover it .. then what?




as my non-custodial dad always told me on permitted custodial visits!

"...there are no rules in a fight son"

to this day he remains correct!!!!!!!


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## Logique (16 March 2011)

ChaoSI said:


> kid got what he deserved.
> 
> as for admin.. they of course had to suspend both...
> imo... 'anti-bullying' campaigns are nice in theory... but are almost always doomed to fail.. it is an impossible thing to police and if you discover it .. then what?



Agree. An electrifying moment on internet. That little dude learned a big lesson.


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## Lantern (16 March 2011)

The big lad did nothing wrong IMHO
He was quite restrained untill he snapped.
Thats the trouble with pushing someones buttons, you have no idea where it will go.

It's the stupid teacher who should get the counciling.


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## awg (16 March 2011)

They had to suspend that kid after a body slam like that

Violence is less tolerated in schools than when I was a lad

In those days you fought with your fists and that defined the pecking order.

Everyone should learn self -defense. ( we still had to box at school, and not long before i was there kids caught fighting were still sometimes made to settle it in the boxing ring)

I remember a fat kid used to get bullied.. he had big thick arms like the kid in the video, one day he let loose and a couple of bullies had a lot of lumps on their head, very,very funny, no more trouble for him.

I moved from effete Noth Sydney to a school where every second kid was a coal miners son. They certainly tested you out. It was of the utmost importance to try and break their nose. Copped a few beltings at first, but they soon move on to a new victim if they KNOW you will fight back. ( best thing i ever did was king hit one of the fkers right in the thoat)

always taught my 3 sons to try and talk there way out, but if there was physical bullying, bash them & stuff the consequences...they never got bullied.

That smaller kid must have a small brain...standard tactic for big guys is to CHARGE.. with a view to trample, crush and stomp your attacker, a very effective method against a smaller opponent, unless they are trained in martial arts, or armed


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## sails (16 March 2011)

Is there a better martial arts than another to help kids stand up to bullies? 

Granddaughter has copped a fair bit of teasing and some bullying.  We read a book which I think was called "Bully blocking" - borrowed it from the library so not sure of the author now. Some of the tips in there helped such as helping her laugh off teasing and absolutely not showing any negative reaction to the teasing.

I believe they are running Taikwando in the evenings at her school, but don't know if that is the best way to go.  Granddaughter is off to high school next year, so we are hoping to help her build more confidence.


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## awg (16 March 2011)

sails said:


> Is there a better martial arts than another to help kids stand up to bullies?




There would be disagreement on this topic.

Most martial arts teach do evrything to avoid confrontation, still great for skills and fitness.

Unfortunately the most "useful" (imo) emphasise much more physical contact in training and are not for the feint-hearted.

The best bet is to talk to the master and check his approach.

It is also possible to obtain private coaching, if the situation warrants it.

As I indicated, I have a tendency to meet bullying with aggression, a sly headbutt will finish most in-yr-face bullies  ( hey thats what they teach)


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## nomore4s (16 March 2011)

sails said:


> Is there a better martial arts than another to help kids stand up to bullies?
> 
> Granddaughter has copped a fair bit of teasing and some bullying.  We read a book which I think was called "Bully blocking" - borrowed it from the library so not sure of the author now. Some of the tips in there helped such as helping her laugh off teasing and absolutely not showing any negative reaction to the teasing.
> 
> I believe they are running Taikwando in the evenings at her school, but don't know if that is the best way to go.  Granddaughter is off to high school next year, so we are hoping to help her build more confidence.




Sails, probably the best way to go is too find a martial arts class that teaches basic self defense rather then a certain form of martial arts unless your granddaughter wants to study martial arts for a number of years.

Understanding basic holds like wrist, elbow & arm locks is also very handy against bullies as it can put them in their place without doing any real damage and escalating the confrontation. A good self defense class should teach basic holds and strikes and is probably the way to go for everyone wanting to learn how to protect themselves, you could maybe attend the classes with your grand-daughter?


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## Gringotts Bank (16 March 2011)

sails said:


> Is there a better martial arts than another to help kids stand up to bullies?
> 
> Granddaughter has copped a fair bit of teasing and some bullying.  We read a book which I think was called "Bully blocking" - borrowed it from the library so not sure of the author now. Some of the tips in there helped such as helping her laugh off teasing and absolutely not showing any negative reaction to the teasing.
> 
> I believe they are running Taikwando in the evenings at her school, but don't know if that is the best way to go.  Granddaughter is off to high school next year, so we are hoping to help her build more confidence.




The ideal situation is to not react.  By 'not react' I don't mean forcing yourself to swallow a whole heap of anger and frustration, but to simply cultivate an attitude which is immune to criticism.  This is hard for most adults let alone children.  However if she can do that, I can guarantee that the bullying will stop, and it will stop immediately, because there's nothing for it to feed on.  It's very simple to understand, but not so easy to practice.


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## Dowdy (16 March 2011)

sails said:


> Is there a better martial arts than another to help kids stand up to bullies?




I did Wing Chun for a bit (only left because the class wasn't enjoyable - due to a poor instructor)

It's great against bullies since we did alot of work on confrontations. First we shout STOP before we hit them and groin and eye gouges were included in drills.

But the best way to beat a bully (epically if it's just verbal) is to laugh at them


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## prawn_86 (16 March 2011)

Bullying has always happened and always will.

I dont think it has increased since i was at school (last decade). The best way to avoid being bullied is to gain respect. Play a sport that the bullies also play etc


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## Sean K (16 March 2011)

I can't help but have doubts on actual events. I can't believe the big kid just stood there taking hits with his hands down. Was he so bullied (by a kid so much younger and smaller) that he couldn't even defend himself up front? I do wonder if he was asking to be hit, just letting the little tyke have a go so he could then try and kill him. 

Or, it's as seen. 

If it's true bullying, bravo.


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## nunthewiser (16 March 2011)

would there be the same comments here if the big fella snapped the blokes neck instead of the ankle on the slam dunk?

i personally think the boy did the right thing in fighting back but am concerned on lack of control in that slam dunk situation......... could have been a lot more serious if the little fella  landed in a different way.


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## prawn_86 (16 March 2011)

nunthewiser said:


> would there be the same comments here if the big fella snapped the blokes neck instead of the ankle on the slam dunk?




the joys of fighting. things can go wrong when your seeing red and the adrenaline is pumping. The antaganisor should be prepared for this. If your going to bully someone, worst case scenario, be prepared to end up in a wheelchair


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## DB008 (16 March 2011)

awg said:


> As I indicated, I have a tendency to meet bullying with aggression, a sly headbutt will finish most in-yr-face bullies  ( hey thats what they teach)




LOL! I'm in stitches with that one! 

But as Nun said above, if the "slam dunk" went pear shaped, little one might have ended up in a wheelchair. Having said that, if the older kid did nothing, he might have kept copping punches to the head, which could have also resulted in damage somewhere.


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## trainspotter (16 March 2011)

A NSW Department of Education and Training spokeswoman said the school "does not tolerate any violence and deals with all cases according to its community-agreed discipline code".

"Both students in a fight at the school shown on the internet have been suspended ... the only injury sustained was a grazed knee."

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/ne...er-fighting-back/story-e6freuzi-1226022076411


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## tech/a (16 March 2011)

From 15 I trained in wing chun and jujitsu
Never had a problem every male should learn a discipline 
Boxing is excellent --- don't need to turn professional
Just learn to take care of yourself
A life long investment which will serve you well!!


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## bbker (16 March 2011)

Hey tech/a, can you clear your inbox?


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## Garpal Gumnut (16 March 2011)

They are just kids, they will sort it out, Casey did the right thing under the circumstances. 

Not a bicycle helmet in sight.

gg


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## IFocus (16 March 2011)

Lantern said:


> The big lad did nothing wrong IMHO




Disagree, he failed to put the boots in while the little mongrel was on the ground.


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## adobee (16 March 2011)

needs to be a better resolve.. next step is that the fat kid pulls out a glock a puts a couple of shots in the kids head after playing modern warefare all night ..

for some reason there always seems to be little skinny runts who want to try and start big fat kids..  

Some martial arts would be a better technique than WWF, whilst effective could be a bit unfortunate if someone has their next snapped..


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## awg (16 March 2011)

I suppose things have changed a fair bit from the good ole days

what with gangs and ethnic conflict, and as Julia mentioned home problems and junior psychos are a problem that is difficult to manage, they caned the crap out of us if we acted up too much.

Nomore mentioned locks and holds, good stuff to learn, my sis is 4th dan Okinawan karate, and wrist locks are a specialty.

finger breaking is a sweet & easy technique  ( used by the ancient greeks in Pankration)... who knows how the idiot got his finger broken?... he must of hit me in the head, sir.    (girls can use too)

A fellow was demonstarting his high kicks to my sis, and she said " in Goju Ryo, we prefer to wait till they are on the ground till we kick them" 

I say get the grandaughter watching UFC for sure...not being bullied is about spirit of refusing to be dominated, as much as anything else


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## awg (16 March 2011)

adobee said:


> pulls out a glock a puts a couple of shots in the kids head .




think the correct terminology is "pop a cap in the m.........r"


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## Chris45 (17 March 2011)

kennas said:


> I can't believe the big kid just stood there taking hits with his hands down. Was he so bullied (by a kid so much younger and smaller) that he couldn't even defend himself up front? I do wonder if he was asking to be hit, just letting the little tyke have a go so he could then try and kill him.



The initial punch to the big kid's head was successfully parried and didn't connect - nothing wrong with his defences! Subsequent jabs to his body probably weren't even felt. Maybe he just got annoyed by the little runt dancing around in front of him and showing off and decided enough was enough.

Yet another example of a little runt trying to prove himself by bullying what he thinks is a soft target. He got what he deserved and was damned lucky to suffer only a broken ankle.

I wonder what the outcome of the Feb-10 Brisbane Elliott Fletcher stabbing case was? The little bully really got his comeuppance that time but sadly the straight 'A' student's life (the victim of the bullying) was wrecked in the process.


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## Who Dares Wins (17 March 2011)

Lantern said:


> It's the stupid teacher who should get the counciling.




Yeah thats true.

But come on, if we are honest, teachers are a breed of their own really. Everytime Im out somewhere or at a function and I get introduced to a teacher Ã automatically know what I'm dealing with. You know, lots of seriousness, nodding, handwringing but all with that over-riding sense that you must do as they tell you because they know best.

I didnt get bullied much at school but there was one brief stage.

I didnt like fighting but one day thought i'd give it a go with a bully who, similarly, was younger and smaller than myself - he crossed the street after that when he saw me coming. That was all it took. I was 15 at the time and got brought before the headmistress who was a lesbian as it happens (worst sort of headmistress you can have), I didnt give a flying **** what she thought about it and told her so. Told her i'd do it again if the same situation presented itself. You see, teachers cant handle that sort of open and disregarding disobedience, it goes against their whole thing about you being the kid and doing as you're told. She just about did a somersault out the window.

The whole thing of deciding to stand up for myself in a fight had an unintended consequence though......I really liked it.

I've got a young boy now and Im gonna teach him to let the first one go if he gets picked on, but after that beat the cr*p out of 'em


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## Chris45 (17 March 2011)

Chris45 said:


> The initial punch to the big kid's head was successfully parried and didn't connect



Correction: After viewing the full video here:
http://www.tmz.com/2011/03/15/australian-bully-video-school-suspension/
The first punch connected and it was the second punch that was parried.



> TMZ spoke with a family member of one of the kids ... who told us the bully was suspended for twenty-one days following the incident and the kid being bullied was suspended for 4 -- since he was violent as well.
> 
> We're also told the kid on the receiving end of the vicious body slam did not suffer any serious injuries ... despite the fact he came off the ground with a severe limp.
> 
> Sources tell us the kid who was being bullied is handling the media attention surprisingly well -- and is "very happy" he's received so much support.


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## Knobby22 (17 March 2011)

Did you see that smaller kids big mate come up to tackle him next. Thankfully a girl stood up to him and told him to leave the fat kid alone.

It was a gang against one. I hope the fat kid gets looked after by the school.

I was taught to fight back. Now we are supposed to run to teacher. Doesn't work.


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## Chris45 (17 March 2011)

The little runt should be expelled for bullying and starting the fight or, preferably, be given six-of-the-best with a stiff leather belt across the backside and be put in fear for his life if he does it again. What boys lack these days is fear of a higher authority.

The child psychologists have had corporal punishment banned and kids know that anyone who touches them can be charged with assault. Nowadays it's all 'let's sit down and discuss this'. It's a joke!

Carrot *AND STICK* (lots of sweet little carrots but a firm stick lurking in the shadows and produced occasionally) - it's not rocket science!


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## SM Junkie (17 March 2011)

I hope the little bully has learnt a big lesson.  He was very lucky he did not get seriously hurt (thankfully). Hope that he never bullies again.


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## GumbyLearner (17 March 2011)

SM Junkie said:


> I hope the little bully has learnt a big lesson.  He was very lucky he did not get seriously hurt (thankfully). Hope that he never bullies again.




I doubt it. Next time he will probably try to outnumber the kid 10 to 1 rather than 3 to 1.  That's how a lot of kids think these days. He will also probably pre-meditate the attack with 4 or 5 mobile phone video cameras on him this time, to retrieve some of that built up cowardly pride. That little troublemaker should be expelled and other schools in the district should be warned about his little twisted world of lights, camera, and cowardice. On the other hand the kid standing up for himself deserves a medal. 

One of my cousins was in a similar situation at a small Catholic private school for years. He smashed one of his perpetual tormentors one day and was suspended for defending himself.

I have seen a lot worse at school in the past. All we need now are the PC guys to claim it was intolerable for that young fella to defend himself. And somehow equate his action with a systemic problem amongst today's youth.   

There are a couple of Mark Twain quotes that are worthy of note in this situation

This one for the bully and his camera voyeur gang mates 

1) A man who tries to carry a cat home by its tail will learn a lesson that can be learned in no other way.
Mark Twain

And this one for the Principal and the Teachers of the institution where it occurred.

2) In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.
Mark Twain 

*The SA government reaction
*
http://www.smh.com.au/technology/te...t--images-on-the-internet-20110316-1bwye.html

*Law proposed against uploading violent images on the internet*
March 16, 2011

The South Australian government wants to make it an offence to post violent or other degrading images on the internet.

Attorney-General John Rau said the state's proposed legislation, to be introduced this year, would be the first of its kind in Australia.

It will make it an offence to knowingly take or publish humiliating, demeaning or degrading images of another person without their consent.
Advertisement: Story continues below

Mr Rau said it was designed to tackle thugs who filmed assaults and then posted them on the internet.

The move follows the appearance of a viral video on YouTube showing a student in an Australian school playground tormenting another boy and then being picked up and violently thrown on the ground by the victim.

"The government wants to attack this disgusting fad of thugs engineering and filming violent and humiliating acts and posting the images to websites," Mr Rau said today.

"This behaviour is so disturbing and potentially damaging to the victims that I believe the creators of these images should be subject to severe penalties, including jail sentences.

"The government wants to make it very clear that if a person participates in any way in an act of this sort, then the consequences will be severe."

Mr Rau said the onus would be on the person charged to prove that they had a legitimate purpose for capturing the images, other than humiliating, degrading or demeaning the victim.

The proposed laws would cover anyone involved in the process of deliberately filming and publishing the images.

"For example, if you knowingly allow someone to use your computer or phone to upload the images, you could be covered by the laws," Mr Rau said.

"If you knowingly participate in someone's humiliation while someone else films it, you could also find yourself charged with a serious offence."

But opposition justice spokesman Stephen Wade said the government's proposals lacked detail.

"We have no indication of how this initiative will be policed or how we can avoid people being unfairly caught by the legislation," Mr Wade said.   
****************************************************************
Whatever happened to prevention? Oh it goes on, but you can't watch it!
If it wasn't filmed it would never have made the headlines!!!!! And the attackers would probably be able to continue on at the beginning of every first semester in the same way!!!! WAJ!

Just my


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## easylikesunday (17 March 2011)

Solution for bullies?

BAS RUTTEN BABY!


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## Chris45 (18 March 2011)

Casey Heynes is now world famous and has achieved hero status.
http://www.nma.tv/casey-punisher-scores-victory-bullies/
http://www.facebook.com/CaseyThaPunisher
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=152601558134995&oid=197964833557210&comments

Pages will probably disappear soon.


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## Mofra (18 March 2011)

Who Dares Wins said:


> But come on, if we are honest, teachers are a breed of their own really. Everytime Im out somewhere or at a function and I get introduced to a teacher Ã automatically know what I'm dealing with. You know, lots of seriousness, nodding, handwringing but all with that over-riding sense that you must do as they tell you because they know best.



So you judge people solely on their occupation?


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## Who Dares Wins (19 March 2011)

Mofra said:


> So you judge people solely on their occupation?




Only with teachers. With other occupations there'll be a couple of other factors.


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## trainspotter (19 March 2011)

I'm with Who Dares Wins on this one about teachers. I should know. I married one 

They have never left school. Primary, secondary, university then back to school. Ringing bells and DOT time and "professional development day" , pupil free days, school holidays and they just LOVE the unions. Never worked for a private enterprise, know NOTHING about business but can tell you how to run yours, lapping up Govt handouts and only working 8 months of the year with paid holidays. When they are wrong (which they never are) they blame the system and the lack of training. Then they whinge as to how hard they are worked and cry compo and stress leave at a drop of a hat.

Yep ....... a breed of their own alright.


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## Ageo (19 March 2011)

If i was the father of that skinny twat i would have belted him again and said "perhaps now you have learnt your lesson", to say the bully went too far is ludicrous.... its like saying i shot an intruder but i should have tried and played tootsies with him instead.

This video should be shown to all kids in schools which teaches bullies the consequences.


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## tothemax6 (19 March 2011)

Ageo said:


> If i was the father of that skinny twat i would have belted him again and said "perhaps now you have learnt your lesson", to say the bully went too far is ludicrous.... its like saying i shot an intruder but i should have tried and played tootsies with him instead.
> 
> This video should be shown to all kids in schools which teaches bullies the consequences.



+1, the fat kid should receive a reward. Fantastic slam, if I do say so myself.

I'm also with Who Dares Wins. Decent and upstanding people who are also school teachers DO exist, but in the same way that honest and sincere politicians exist .


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## Gringotts Bank (19 March 2011)

There's nothing ok about what the big kid did.  At this rate he will end up being a nightclub bouncer when he grows up.... if he grows up.  Can't imagine what sort of parents he has.  I can understand kids saying it's good that he did that, but not a full grown adult.


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## Calliope (19 March 2011)

Ageo said:


> If i was the father of that skinny twat i would have belted him again and said "perhaps now you have learnt your lesson"




I saw the mother interviewed on TV. I doubt that the father is still around.


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## white_crane (19 March 2011)

So far on this thread about bullying we've seen prejudice against teachers and recommendations of taking up martial arts... :shake:


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## gav (19 March 2011)

trainspotter said:


> I'm with Who Dares Wins on this one about teachers. I should know. I married one
> 
> They have never left school. Primary, secondary, university then back to school. Ringing bells and DOT time and "professional development day" , pupil free days, school holidays and they just LOVE the unions. Never worked for a private enterprise, know NOTHING about business but can tell you how to run yours, lapping up Govt handouts and only working 8 months of the year with paid holidays. When they are wrong (which they never are) they blame the system and the lack of training. Then they whinge as to how hard they are worked and cry compo and stress leave at a drop of a hat.
> 
> Yep ....... a breed of their own alright.




And I'm about to marry one...  Part of what you have mentioned has already come to fruition.  Thanks for letting me know what else I'm in for!


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## GumbyLearner (20 March 2011)

Maybe schools need more bully-watchers like Captain Australia. 

Inspired by the Cult movie classic Kick-Ass. 

I wonder if he has some sidekicks like Big Daddy who dress like Batman and Hit Girl draped in purple? 

I wonder if he gets up everyday to fight the bad guys with all that metal is his body and damaged nerve endings? 

Maybe he has a love interest who works in the local methadone clinic? 

Nah. Only in the movies. :

*Captain Australia is Queensland's first superhero, and has vowed to clean up the streets of Brisbane
*by Anthony Templeton

http://www.couriermail.com.au/news/...eets-of-brisbane/story-e6freon6-1226015976662

HE spends his days changing nappies, but come nightfall the domesticated dad of two transforms into Brisbane's guardian.

mX reports that Captain Australia is Brisbane's dinky-di superhero, a real-life replica of the cult US film Kick-Ass.

Most weekends, the middle-aged father of two regularly patrols Fortitude Valley's seedier streets.

Dressed in green and gold, Captain Australia says ``being a hero isn't as glamorous as you might think''.

``There's no brooding on the edge of a skyscraper overlooking the city.''

His only defences against crime? A utility belt holding a torch, mobile phone and video camera.


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## GumbyLearner (20 March 2011)

GumbyLearner said:


> Maybe schools need more bully-watchers like Captain Australia.
> 
> Inspired by the Cult movie classic Kick-Ass.
> 
> ...




As for Kick-Ass the movie


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## Ageo (20 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> There's nothing ok about what the big kid did.  At this rate he will end up being a nightclub bouncer when he grows up.... if he grows up.  Can't imagine what sort of parents he has.  I can understand kids saying it's good that he did that, but not a full grown adult.




Yep i agree, he should have just stood their and keeping taking those punches, and who knows how far or long it was gonna go for, then after get some counseling because he has been deeply traumatized by the event which should be followed by more counseling and medication to help with his "condition"........



Bank thats like saying kids shouldnt be playing with toy guns because they might grow up and start killing everyone.....


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## Chris45 (20 March 2011)

Well these kids are certainly getting more than their fifteen minutes of fame, thanks to the ubiquitous camera phone and the Internet and current affairs programs.

I bet celebrity agent Max Markson is somewhere in the background, sniffing them out for an opportunity.

There are several facebook pages:
http://www.facebook.com/CaseyThaPunisher
http://www.facebook.com/Casey.Heyness
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Casey-Heynes/196106643745318

And even a dedicated website:
http://www.caseyheynes.com/

Several photos of the budding young gangster, Ritchard Gale, even one of him in his kitchen on a crutch, so obviously everyone’s in on it.
http://www.facebook.com/CaseyThaPunisher#!/CaseyThaPunisher?sk=photos

And tonight, Sunday 6:30 on Nine, Karl Stefanovic is doing an *ACA Special* just in case anyone's not up to speed on all this. ... How could we ever survive without TT and ACA???

I can’t help but wonder about the wisdom of all this and it makes me very happy not to be a Gen-Y or Gen-Z having to learn how to cope with it all!!!


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## Garpal Gumnut (20 March 2011)

This episode for me illustrates the wisdom of a cause close to my heart.

That all children in daycare, kindergarten, preschool, primary and high schools , should wear bicycle helmets. 

There is an obvious risk, from bullying, of head injury, and as some posters here believe, many head injuries could be averted.

We could even extend it to the bullies on the trading floor.

gg


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## moXJO (20 March 2011)

Garpal Gumnut said:


> This episode for me illustrates the wisdom of a cause close to my heart.
> 
> That all children in daycare, kindergarten, preschool, primary and high schools , should wear bicycle helmets.
> 
> ...




More basket weaving needs to be enforced at schools. Also we all need to be more PC. And don't forget compensation and therapy for the bully to fast track his recovery to antagonize other kids.


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## Gringotts Bank (20 March 2011)

Ageo said:


> Yep i agree, he should have just stood their and keeping taking those punches, and who knows how far or long it was gonna go for, then after get some counseling because he has been deeply traumatized by the event which should be followed by more counseling and medication to help with his "condition"........
> 
> 
> 
> Bank thats like saying kids shouldnt be playing with toy guns because they might grow up and start killing everyone.....




No need to stand there and take anything.  Certain situations might call for a show of force, it's just that he was quite violent and people are applauding that.  Applauding violence is insanity.

The big boy's father has about 4 teeth missing - I wonder how that happened?  He had no idea that his own son had been bullied his entire school life, and that indicates he has no interest in the welfare of his own son.  And then there's the question of why the boy is over-eating - hello Dad????  Does the boy have self esteem problems???  He's not really a bloke who should have had kids.

For channel 9 to sensationalize it and call him a hero is just beyond pathetic.  In their world, tit for tat is "GOOD STUFF!!"

Tit for tat, eye for an eye....... oh boy.  Caveman stuff.  Seriously.  Have a look back through history and see how well eye for an eye mentality has worked.


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## Garpal Gumnut (20 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> No need to stand there and take anything.  Certain situations might call for a show of force, it's just that he was quite violent and people are applauding that.  Applauding violence is insanity.
> 
> The big boy's father has about 4 teeth missing - I wonder how that happened?  He had no idea that his own son had been bullied his entire school life, and that indicates he has no interest in the welfare of his own son.  And then there's the question of why the boy is over-eating - hello Dad????  Does the boy have self esteem problems???  He's not really a bloke who should have had kids.
> 
> ...




Huge assumptions GB. Huge. I never watch Ch9 but was drawn to the kid's story. I think he was articulate and gave a truthful account of his life.

gg


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## gav (20 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> The big boy's father has about 4 teeth missing - I wonder how that happened?




And judging by your profile picture, you only have 2 teeth!  How'd that happen?? :


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## Ageo (21 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> .  Applauding violence is insanity.




Really? do you have kids? if 1 of your daughters were raped and beaten to death and someone found em and tortured the pricks would you condemn their actions?

The problem i find (especially in this country) is that we feel bad for the person doing the crime and that they should get 2nd chances etc..... but the victim should know better.

The quicker kids and adults realize that crime will not be tolerated the better.


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## Logique (21 March 2011)

Watched the Ch9 special last night. 

The kid needs a change of scene, and good people around him. A governt grant or public donations to get him into a good school, with good values and a good administration that protects and fosters kids. 

The longer the program went, the angrier I felt towards the people around him (with the exception of his sister) who have let him down, serially.  

And not least the school and teachers. No wonder they wouldn't show their faces on the program.


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## Who Dares Wins (21 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> Applauding violence is insanity.




Oh come on!

You've obviously led one of those charmed lives where nothing horrendous and out of the blue has happened to you.

Wait till someone bursts in the door and has a crack at your mum with a spade as happened to mine........trust me, you'll feel differently.


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## springhill (21 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> No need to stand there and take anything.  Certain situations might call for a show of force, it's just that he was quite violent and people are applauding that.  Applauding violence is insanity.
> 
> The big boy's father has about 4 teeth missing - I wonder how that happened?  He had no idea that his own son had been bullied his entire school life, and that indicates he has no interest in the welfare of his own son.  And then there's the question of why the boy is over-eating - hello Dad????  Does the boy have self esteem problems???  He's not really a bloke who should have had kids.
> 
> ...




I can't agree with this last part, this was not tit for tat, that would imply that the bully perpetrated violence against the victim ONLY ONCE and the victim retaliated at the first offence.
This was a sustained attack over years.
Everyone has a breaking point, GB.


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## Gringotts Bank (21 March 2011)

I guess standing up for yourself takes a degree of courage at that age (or any age, depending on the degree of insult), but it's not that big a deal.  I've had to do it a couple of times as a kid, like most people.  You do what's necessary, hopefully just enough to put the wind up someone without causing damage, but I understand things can easily escalate in a heated moment.

The real problem in this instance is that all he has learned is that he can stand up for himself.  That's a small victory.  What he needs to learn is that he is 'ok', that there is nothing wrong with him as a person (whether he's fat ot not, whether his Dad cares for him or not, etc).  Feeling inadequate creates a sense of vulnerability that bullies will smell a mile off.  Lose that feeling and the bully won't even notice you as a target - you just become another one of the crowd he wouldn't dare to pick on.

The bully needs to learn the very same lesson and stop externalizing his pain.

Bullying, like any problem in society, is not the problem in itself, it's always a symptom of something else.


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## Chris45 (21 March 2011)

The Gale child was a strawweight and easy for a heavyweight to deal with, but I just hope that, after all of this publicity, some bigger bully doesn’t feel the need to take Casey down for some twisted reason.

If the kid’s overweight, it’s most likely his parents’ fault for feeding him junk food instead of good nutritious food, and for not taking a proper interest in his physical development. He comes across as a really decent person and he needs a break and a bit of respect and support from his peers, so I hope the school steps up and takes action to ensure the bullying stops, although I’m not optimistic they will.

The education system seems to be totally incapable of devising a way of eliminating bullying so that kids can receive their education in a safe environment without the constant fear of being viciously bashed and then humiliated on the Internet. Why are kids allowed to have mobile camera phones in school for a start? ... Oh, I forgot, KRudd and his mob want kids to be part of the digital revolution don’t they? Well, mobiles are NOT necessary for a child's education and, along with knives and guns, should be BANNED!


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## Mister Mark (21 March 2011)

As a child i was small and from a broken home, very unusual in those times, i would be the only child without a father in some tough schools and was bullied constantly.
If you dont have the necessary supports around you it is hard, i understand what the boy bullied did.
I had daughters so their bullying was different to mine and with my wifes help we were able to help them grow and learn from it.
I have grandsons now, I take them weekly to tae kwon doe lessons for not only self defence but to learn personal disipline, control and how to handle confrontation.
They have learned so much and it helps them to become better people i believe.
Just my thoughts


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## tothemax6 (21 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> Tit for tat, eye for an eye....... oh boy.  Caveman stuff.  Seriously.  Have a look back through history and see how well eye for an eye mentality has worked.



History is filled with dead nations that lost an eye and failed to take one in return.

Retaliation is very important, it is not a vice. It is only the risk of retaliation that stops bad men being in control. This is the whole purpose of the police force - if you hurt someone, you will be arrested and imprisoned. This is the ideal retaliation. However in the absence of police, when it is one man faced with a thug, the man has only his hands and his wits with which to retaliate. He must make the decision: "either the thug wins, or I win". The man who chooses the former is not to be praised, he is to be mocked.

Retaliation is moral.


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## Gringotts Bank (21 March 2011)

I'm not into morality as a general rule, just what works and what feels right.

I'd use violence if I had to, but my first line of defense would be a few Jedi mind tricks, or perhaps running away like a little girl. 

Now that you've had a good laugh, there are actually ways* of dealing with even the most out of control people that can save both them and you a lot of pain and anguish, whereupon both of you have a good chance of walking away unharmed.

* top secret black ops stuff, if you catch my drift!  

But if you really think retaliation is a good idea, I can't stop you....   or can I?


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## Tink (22 March 2011)

I agree GB - walking away is always the best. Takes more courage in my books to walk than to fight.

I havent taken much notice of this as ACA and TT articles dont interest me.

Curious what the bullies parents had to say about their child.


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## Kimberly (22 March 2011)

I used to be a teacher, and I have no issue with what Casey did!
Hopefully this serves as an example to bullies and those being bullied!


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## trainspotter (22 March 2011)

Now the "bully" wants his 15 minutes of fame claiming he was the victim and was retaliating LOLOLOLOLOL ........ pour some more petrol on this fire as it is not dead yet.


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## wayneL (22 March 2011)

Tink said:


> I agree GB - walking away is always the best.




Not always. The most persistent bullies will follow you and keep on bullying. They will even punch you in the back of the head.


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## adobee (22 March 2011)

When I was at primary school an older boy once started bullying & teasing me when I was in the toilets at the urinal.. I turned around and wee'd on him.. I have found this a very useful technique for dealing with bullies there on..


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## joea (22 March 2011)

Who was the real bully.?
The kid doing the hitting, or the two bigger boys , one filming and the other edging the smaller kid on.?
It is interesting to note when Casey reacted, a bigger boy advances on Casey. In the actual film this larger boy advancing on Casey was told to "back off" by a girl.
So what I see is a smaller boy, trying to fit in being edged on by two older boys getting their kicks from the whole deal.
I think Casey will use this experience, and turn into something good.
The bully, and those associated with filmning, have a long way to go to get anywhere!!!
Cheers


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## Gringotts Bank (22 March 2011)

What everyone fails to see was that the big kid wasn't frightened.  Watch his face, watch his breathing and remember he is twice the size of the little kid.  He was almost inviting the smaller kid to walk into his trap.  Why?  Probably because he had been watching wrestling on TV and thought, hmm....  I could do that!  I don't buy the big kid's story at all.  If you're frightened when someone is bullying you, the last thing on your mind is to wait until the bully has his back turned then pick him up and slam him.  While the small kid is a total twit, the big kid will turn out to be a thug, mark my words.

The problem is that when people look at something like this, they interpret it through a whole range of personal and emotional filters, obscuring the truth.  Good lesson for stock trading.  Do you see "what is" or what you want or fear?


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## wayneL (22 March 2011)

Interesting point of view GB.

Are we watching the same video?


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## Greg (22 March 2011)

Parts of this filming were a little too stage managed. Clearly there was a degree of preparation before the incident took place, so who knows who said what to whom. The upshot is that the "worm that turned" elements appealed to a lot of people who saw the victim turn the tables on the protagonist. The underlying issues though is more of a challenge. Until parents and teachers agree that discipline is the responsibility of both parties, at school and at home, and overdone political correctness is replaced with a common sense model, then maybe we can see this kind of behaviour diminish.
Do kids really need mobile phones at school? No, they don't. Remove the filming ability from the equation and suddenly the attention seeker loses his/her audience and therefore his/her interest in being filmed. No fame, no gain?


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## Gringotts Bank (22 March 2011)

wayneL said:


> Interesting point of view GB.
> 
> Are we watching the same video?




Wayne he's standing there with his arms by his side as the kid dances in front of him like Ali.  If someone is threatening you, the moment they come close, your arms will come up in front of you automatically..... _unless you're not frightened._  Unless you want to pull someone into your trap and practise a little body slam manoeuver you've been dying to use while on camera.


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## Ageo (22 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> Wayne he's standing there with his arms by his side as the kid dances in front of him like Ali.  If someone is threatening you, the moment they come close, your arms will come up in front of you automatically..... _unless you're not frightened._  Unless you want to pull someone into your trap and practise a little body slam manoeuver you've been dying to use while on camera.




Banks i forgot you knew everything about self defence and combat stances......

Mate i wish i knew everything like you.......

Do you have any kids?


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## Gringotts Bank (22 March 2011)

Ageo said:


> Mate i wish i knew everything like you.......




I've been making some very good calls lately.  You should tune in.


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## wayneL (22 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> Wayne he's standing there with his arms by his side as the kid dances in front of him like Ali.  If someone is threatening you, the moment they come close, your arms will come up in front of you automatically..... _unless you're not frightened._  Unless you want to pull someone into your trap and practise a little body slam manoeuver you've been dying to use while on camera.




So the kid is lying when he says he's been bullied for three years? And the little bloke's mates weren't there goading him on? He didn't get punched in the face beforehand? He didn't walk away when he thought he could?

Are you a lawyer?


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## sails (22 March 2011)

Gringotts Bank said:


> What everyone fails to see was that the big kid wasn't frightened...




Come on GB wakey wakey... of course he wasn't frightened - Casey was clearly the stronger of the two AND clearly he had always taken the bullying before and was somewhat used to it AND it clearly shows the stupid littly bully trying to bignote himself infront of his audience (as bullies do) was taken by surprise.  If Casey had used his strength in this way before, I believe the bully would have been ducking out of his way.  It does seem that this is the first time Casey snapped when watching the unexpected surprise of his weasley attacker.

Agree with WayneL - I think you must have seen a different version than most or you have some very rose coloured glasses on in favour of the little stupid guy who will hopefully stop his stupidiity in bullying and it just may save his life in later years.

I can't stand bullies - they are the ultimate cowards in picking targets they think won't get back at them.  I hope this sends a good lesson to the other cowardly bullies out there who pick on people they don't think will retaliate - because, one day they just might snap too.  



Kimberly said:


> I used to be a teacher, and I have no issue with what Casey did!
> Hopefully this serves as an example to bullies and those being bullied!




Totally agree...



wayneL said:


> Not always. The most persistent bullies will follow you and keep on bullying. They will even punch you in the back of the head.




Yes, so true.  They can be a persistent menace until the target uses techniques to stop the bullying. They are despicable, cowardly and relentless.


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## Calliope (22 March 2011)

The real low-lifes in this unpleasant saga are Today Tonight (7) and a Current Affair (9). They are real bottom feeders.


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## DB008 (22 March 2011)

Found a .gif of it.


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## tothemax6 (22 March 2011)

Tink said:


> I agree GB - walking away is always the best. Takes more courage in my books to walk than to fight.



Never understood the 'walk away' argument. 'Walking away' is a legitimate course of action when there is equal antagonism from the two parties, i.e. 'two guys getting agro with each other'. Here, they either punch it out, or they decide to walk away and cool down.
In the case where their is an antagonist and a victim (like in bullying), the victim attempting to walk away would achieve nothing but a kick in the back. 
Think, Tink.


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## Bill M (22 March 2011)

I rarely comment on these issues but I will in this case. Of the footage that I have seen at least a dozen times and of the interview of both the fat and skinny kids on TV I clearly conclude the skinny kid started the physical violence. He shaped up and clearly struck the fat kid twice and wanted to keep going. How many bashes in the head and stomach was the fat kid going to get get if he had not stopped it? How much physical violence should one put up with before he defends himself? That fat kid did what he had to do to protect himself, no ifs or buts. He was the victim and nobody ever did anything to help him in the past, not the teachers, parents or anyone else. I do not condone violence but if you are going to get belted into a pulp or to your death shouldn't you at least try to protect yourself?

It's all good and well saying no to violence but how would you feel if the Police knocked on your door and said, sorry to inform you but your child has just been beaten up at school and is in a coma in hospital and in a serious condition? Oh hang on you taught him never to defend himself, huh?


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## Tink (23 March 2011)

I am not sure if that was directed at me Bill, but of course my children would defend themselves. 

Both my children have done Karate from Grade 3 and I did a year of self defence, not that we have ever had to use it.

I just believe that its best to walk away rather than fight as fighting achieves nothing.


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## adobee (23 March 2011)

Thats a great GIF.. can some one tell me how to copy and past GIFs .. or save them.. I seem to end up with just one picture of Zangiff !?!??


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## Calliope (23 March 2011)

The dysfunctional families of these two clowns are the big winners.



> FURIOUS teachers believe prime-time TV interviews with the two students at the centre of the YouTube bodyslam video glorify violence and make it harder for schools to tackle bullying.
> Sydney schoolboys Casey Heynes and Ritchard Gale hit international headlines after their schoolyard fight was broadcast on the internet.
> *The families of the two boys have reportedly made about $40,000 each after TV interviews on A Current Affair and Today Tonight following the incident.*
> But teachers unions say the glossy coverage surrounding the fight has not been helpful to the children involved, or to teachers who have policies and procedures in place to deal with bullying.




Read more: http://www.news.com.au/national/mak...rn/story-e6frfkvr-1226026624594#ixzz1HO1Zriuh


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## kitehigh (23 March 2011)

Those who advocate to just walk away are living in fantasy land and obviously don't understand or have never dealt with a bully before.  

The only mistake Casey made is he didn't take it far enough he should have dealt than and there with the bigger older kid who had set up the whole thing.  He would have been up hyped up after slamming the little turd and should have immediately taken the bigger kid straight to the ground when he came at him and than choked him out submission style.  Only than would the bullies truly leave him alone as they are cowards by nature.

The world is a violent place and always will be, so you need to be prepared to defend yourself and your family with all means available.


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## Chris45 (23 March 2011)

adobee said:


> Thats a great GIF.. can some one tell me how to copy and past GIFs .. or save them.. I seem to end up with just one picture of Zangiff !?!??



adobee, I’m not an expert on html but this works for me:

1. Create a New Folder (eg ‘Slam’) then right click on the gif and save it to the folder: C:\My Documents\Slam\1300105223354.gif

2. Create a Notepad text file in the same folder: C:\My Documents\Slam\Slam.txt

3. In the text file, copy and paste:
*<html>
<img src="1300105223354.gif" alt="Body Slam"></img>
</html>*

4. Rename the text file: C:\My Documents\Slam\Slam.htm

5. Run it and you should see the animated gif.


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## Chris45 (23 March 2011)

Calliope said:


> Read more: http://www.news.com.au/national/mak...rn/story-e6frfkvr-1226026624594#ixzz1HO1Zriuh



The bit I liked was:


> Tell the person to back off and leave you alone and report it – teachers are trained to deal with this.




Yeah, right!!! What a joke!

As someone commented:


> I agree that clearly the teacher's "policies" do not work otherwise we wouldn't even be having this conversation.


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## dutchie (2 April 2013)

Stamp out bullying.

It's hard enough being different coping at school without having to put up with bullying as well.

Parents need to educate their children to not bully anyone.

Worth reading ......


My son shines in the dark

    by: Kathy Lette
    From: The Australian
    April 02, 2013 12:00AM

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Kathy Lette

Author Kathy Lette with son Julius Robertson. Picture: Dave Poole Source: Supplied

ONE grey, rainy London day, my 11-year-old son arrived home from school with his shirt torn and hair matted. There was a sign sticky-taped to his back. It read: "Kick me, I'm a retard." I ripped it off in fury as a tidal wave of frustration and pity surged through me. "The other kids called me a moron," he whispered, his wide blue eyes filling with tears. "What does that mean? Am I a moron, Mum?" 

Trying to protect a child with special needs from being bullied is like trying to stop ice melting in the desert. There were calls to the school, meetings, promises of closer scrutiny in the playground. But basically, when it comes to defeating bullying -- particularly when your child is an obvious target -- a parent might as well be standing up to Voldemort with a butter knife.

New research, published in the Archives of Paediatrics and Adolescent Medicine last week, suggests that more than half of all teenagers with an autism spectrum disorder are bullied at school, compared with an estimated 11 per cent of children in the general population. It also reveals that the problem is largely ignored.
Digital Pass $1 for first 28 Days

This certainly chimes with my experiences. My son Julius (Jules) was diagnosed with autism aged three. Autism is a life-long neurological disorder, chiefly characterised by an inability to communicate effectively, plus inappropriate or obsessive behaviour. Not getting a joke, not knowing what to say then saying the wrong things, being told off but not understanding why, doing your best but still getting it wrong, feeling confused, left out, frightened, out of synch, all day, every day -- that is the reality of life for someone on the autistic spectrum.

What many people don't know, however, is that the condition also is often linked to a very high IQ. My son walked and talked early. In fact, family and friends thought him "advanced". So you can imagine my shock when, at about 14 months, Jules just lost his language skills. His brain was like a computer that had crashed.

When the pediatrician made his diagnosis in a sooty Victorian-era hospital that day, an ache of love squeezed up from my bone marrow and coagulated around my heart. I felt an overwhelming lioness-type love. It was my job to stop him from tumbling through a hole in the world, like Alice.

My first reaction was denial. I bankrupted myself ricocheting around the country seeing every available expert, all swishing in and out of doors in their white coats. I tried everything, from karma maintenance to cranial massage. My son had so many tests, he must have thought he was being drafted into the elite moon mission astronaut program. I hate to think how many doctors' children I've now put through university.

The next over-powering emotion was guilt. Fathers, while equally loving and supportive, are better at compartmentalising. But a mother's guilt gland throbs. Was it something I ate while pregnant? Soft cheese or sushi? Was it that one glass of wine I drank in the final trimester? Was it something I should have drunk, like pureed beetroot? If only I'd feng-shuied my aura in yogalates classes like Gwyneth Paltrow.

After intense speech therapy, Jules started talking again when he was four. For years experts had been telling me that he had "global delay", yet I found him to be bubbling with the most intriguing questions: "If onions make you cry, are there vegetables that make you happy? Is a harp just a nude piano? What is the speed of dark? Is a vacuum cleaner a broom with a stomach?" was a typical daily onslaught.

All the doctors with their stethoscopic minds couldn't really diagnose my son, but by the age of five the word "Asperger's" was being bandied about.

"Asperger's is a form of autism, but at the high-functioning end of the spectrum," it was explained to me -- at pound stg. 245 ($355) an hour. "People with Asperger's are often of above-average intelligence. They have fewer problems with speech, but still have difficulties understanding and processing social situations."

I burst with optimism. It felt like getting an airline upgrade or a prison reprieve, but my euphoria was short-lived. Every expert agreed on one point: only in a small classroom with specialist teaching, protected from bullying, could Jules reach his potential.

Doctors, nurses, teachers, therapists, social workers, and educational psychologists all agreed that this was the case, but getting the necessary help proved a postcode lottery. The waiting lists for special needs schools are so long there are Stone Age families at the front of the queue.

When my son was five, I had him "statemented", which means that he had a statement of special needs from the education department, promising to "fulfil his educational requirements".

I soon learned to decode this spiel, too: an educational "statement" is really just an adroit piece of jargonised sophistry that promises much but delivers little. The system is designed with bureaucratic speed bumps to slow down a parent's progress.

I filled in forests of forms and saw squadrons of psychologists. The technical term for this process is "being passed from pillar to post". I know families who have lost all their savings appealing in the courts against a council's decision not to fund a child's placement to a special school.

My son was eventually "mainstreamed" in a local state infants school, with the support of a very kind, although untrained helper for a few hours a day.

It was woefully inadequate. It seems to me that putting a child with special needs into a mainstream school is as pointless as giving a fish a bath. Being told off for laziness or chastised for disruptive behaviour, put on detention for failing to understand homework and constantly belittled by peers means that school becomes little more than a master class in low self-esteem. Overworked teachers treated my son as though he was a feral creature recently netted in the Amazon and still adjusting to captivity. And pupils taunted and teased him.

Most children at school strive to master maths and grammar. Kids with special needs strive to make themselves invisible. Although, by age eight, Jules had an encyclopaedic knowledge of tennis, the Beatles, Buddy Holly and Shakespeare, including being able to quote most of Hamlet, the only subject at which he excelled in school was "phoning in sick".

Bullying made school unbearable. Most mornings I had to drag him, shrieking and punching, out of his pyjamas and into school. We always planned to leave the house by 7.15am -- and like clock work, we were usually out the door by 8.35am. My son hated school so much, he often just wouldn't get out of the car. Would it be excusable to call the fire brigade to cut my son out of the vehicle, I wondered, slumped on the curb with my head in my hands, Jules welded to the seat within.

"Only fish should be in schools. It's a prison for children. How can you make me sit in that torture chamber all day?" I can remember the mixture of bafflement and betrayal contorting his 10-year-old face into a mask of dismay as he struggled to rationalise our daily battles. The one person he trusted was forcing him into a place where he was ridiculed for being different and beaten up so badly that on one occasion he needed stitches in his head. The incident was brushed under the carpet as "accidental".

How I envied the normal worries of other mothers, who fretted over sugar content in cereal, how to make broccoli interesting and why their offspring wouldn't eat anything that hadn't danced in an ad on television. The parent of a special needs child has to be their legal advocate, fighting his or her educational corner; full-time scientist -- challenging doctors and questioning medications; executive officer -- making difficult decisions on their behalf; and also, full-time bodyguard against bullies.

High school didn't improve things. My son called his school "Guantanamo Bay". It would take me an hour to haul him out of bed, and only then with a mixture of cajoling, begging, pleading and blackmailing. By screaming till the paint peeled off the walls, I could usually half stuff him into his uniform, but not before he'd trashed his room in the process.

My "brilliant" mothering skills became strikingly apparent when I would then run back to my room and sob into my pillow. Eventually I would summon up the strength to drag him, as he cursed and cussed, to his school gates, before dashing to work, all distraught and dishevelled and panda-eyed from mascara leakage.

The daily ordeal left me more depleted than Our Lady of Put Upon and Exhausted -- the Patron Saint of mothers of children with special needs.

But Jules's anxiety was understandable. Venturing out of the house when you have special needs can feel as hazardous as Scott leaving his Arctic base camp. It's no wonder that the hardest thing for parents like me is to stop mollycoddling. All through his teens, I would never let my son leave home without a list of instructions longer than War and Peace and enough supplies in his backpack to set up a comfortable wilderness homestead. I was so over-protective that my friends and family would often joke that they couldn't believe I'd ever let my son out -- out of my womb, that is.

Even now, whenever my darling boy walks out the door, you'd think he was emigrating.

The fuss, the worry, the long hugs and heartfelt goodbyes. But how will you ever know if your child can cope in the outside world, if you never let him out into it?

When I read about the horrific fates that have befallen other young men with Asperger's, the tragic death of Steven Simpson, who had his genitals set on fire at his 18th birthday, or the autistic boy known as ZH who, in 2008, was falsely imprisoned and shackled by the police for jumping into a swimming pool fully clothed, my paranoia seems justified. After my son was mugged at knife point aged 14, I read this comment from a police officer in the paper: "People with special needs are routinely targeted. I'm afraid, it's the price of disability."

If this is the price of being born "differently abled" then the price is way too high.

The only way to eradicate bullying is to encourage society to be more accepting. I no longer think of people as "normal" or "abnormal" but "ordinary" and "extraordinary".

And I adore my extraordinary son. Despite all the angst and exhaustion, he has brought such joy, humour, love and compassion into my life. And also wonder. Jules is Wikipedia with a pulse. People on the autistic spectrum have a lateral, literal logic which is vivid, hilarious, honest and original. My son is one of the most interesting people I have ever met.

Since he was little, he's kept me on my mental toes by asking me the most tangential questions. The latest: "The American constitution says you must pursue happiness. But how do you know when you've caught it?" And "Why is there no other word for synonym?"

With my son's blessing -- Jules is now 22 -- I have written a novel called The Boy Who Fell To Earth to help destigmatise autism. The book is about a single mother's rollercoaster ride of raising a child with Asperger's. It's basically The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time -- Mark Haddon's famous book on a teenage boy with Asperger's -- but told from the mother's point of view.

While based on my own experiences, the book is also a tribute to all the plucky, inspirational parents I've met who've shared with me their battles against bureaucracy and bullying.

We now know, with diagnostic hindsight, that Mozart, Einstein, Van Gogh, Warhol, even Jane Austen's Mr Darcy, were on the autistic spectrum.

It's time to stamp out the bigotry that excludes people with disabilities from mainstream life.

It's World Autism Awareness Day today, so it's timely to realise that with encouragement, love and support, these unique individuals can fulfil their potential and contribute to society in the most fascinating ways.

Julius tells me that my novel is a "celebration of idiosyncrasies, eccentricities and being different". And he's right.

Because how tedious it would be if we really were all the same -- a case of the bland leading the bland.

Kathy Lette's book The Boy Who Fell to Earth is published in paperback on April 11. Lette is an ambassador for Britain's National Autistic Society.

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/features/my-son-shines-in-the-dark/story-e6frg6z6-1226610469665


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## waza1960 (2 April 2013)

> Stamp out bullying.
> 
> It's hard enough being different coping at school without having to put up with bullying as well.
> 
> Parents need to educate their children to not bully anyone.




  Good luck with that .... The school authorities only pay lip service to address bullying...

  I have Aspergers (diagnosed at 45) am writing a book to help others. I had to overcome many obstacles including  
   bullying and wondering why I was different and at times wondering if life was worth living (no such diagnosis
  as Aspergers until the 70's) Fortunately I came to embrace my differences before I was diagnosed .
    I didn't think the diagnosis would make much difference but since then has given me more perspective.
     Even on this forum I can tell I'm different ie not much response to my comments .
     I stated that I was reposting after an absence of some years welcomed back by 1 (thanks canoz)
      Only post on here to help others and exchange information not be hassled by trolls is it worth it??
     But maybe I don't appear different (many years of learning to fit in)I just think I do. Not knowing having doubt 
     that is the uncomfortable part.

  Hence the avatar lol


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## dutchie (2 April 2013)

waza1960 said:


> Good luck with that .... The school authorities only pay lip service to address bullying...
> 
> I have Aspergers (diagnosed at 45) am writing a book to help others. I had to overcome many obstacles including
> bullying and wondering why I was different and at times wondering if life was worth living (no such diagnosis
> ...




Hi Waza

Belated welcome back.

Glad to hear you have overcome the obstacles in your life and that you are sharing your experiences (just like this lady is). Good luck with that I hope it's a success.

Were you bullied at school? I agree that the schools have limited power to stop bullying hence I think it is more a parent who can make the difference by talking to their children.

It's hard to tell what a person is really like on a forum. Are they male/female  old/young etc etc
so its not surprising that you don't appear different to us.

Forums are also fickle beasts. You can start a thread and get completely different responses to that which you thought. 
You can also make comments to threads and get no answer/ negative/ positive / etc responses - you just don't know.

All you can do is take it as it comes and contribute where you can.

cheers

dutchie


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## Julia (2 April 2013)

waza1960 said:


> Even on this forum I can tell I'm different ie not much response to my comments .



waza, perhaps don't take a non-response as lack of interest or agreement.  I've read many of your posts with interest, agreeing with your point, as I'm sure have others.
But repetitively putting up a post which says +1 or I agree etc is irritating to some members.



> I stated that I was reposting after an absence of some years welcomed back by 1 (thanks canoz)



Most days there are posts by several newcomers or posters who return after an absence.  Is it reasonable to have to offer a response to all of these?  People are absorbed in their own lives.  I don't actually remember your announcing your return.



> Only post on here to help others and exchange information not be hassled by trolls is it worth it??



That's something only you can decide.  Not sure forums are the place to go for 'recognition' and appreciation.



> But maybe I don't appear different (many years of learning to fit in)I just think I do. Not knowing having doubt
> that is the uncomfortable part.



I've never thought of any of your comments as from anyone 'different'.  There are many types of personalities here.  I don't think most of us analyse others too much and just take what they say at face value.
I hope you'll continue to make interesting and useful contributions.


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## sails (2 April 2013)

Below is a video sent to my 13 year old granddaughter who has been a victim of bullying (mostly verbal) for most of her school life.  She is a gentle caring girl with learning difficulties and it has been hard to see her go through this added trauma in her life.  We have read books and tried to help her block the bullies with certain techniques, but even so she still struggled.

A friend sent this video to her and she couldn't stop watching it and asked us to watch it with her - very moving.  It was as if she finally got the acknowledgement she needed as she could identify with it all so much.  The ending is excellent, imo, so will post it here should it help anyone else with kids that are being bullied.

Waza - it is good to have you back...  I thought I had welcomed you back some time ago, but if my memory is incorrect and I failed to do so, I sincerely apologise.


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## waza1960 (2 April 2013)

https://www.aussiestockforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=24576 here's the thread to stop any confusion.



> That's something only you can decide. Not sure forums are the place to go for 'recognition' and appreciation.



Not looking for recognition and appreciation (in fact makes me uncomfortable)just get sick of the trolls and the egos
 that side-track good discussion and sharing of ideas .. but it is the internet.




> Most days there are posts by several newcomers or posters who return after an absence. Is it reasonable to have to offer a response to all of these? People are absorbed in their own lives. I don't actually remember your announcing your return.




  I really don't care about my return being announced or otherwise. To me its just proof that I don't have the social skills or nuances that others do.
 But its not a problem although the belated welcomes are appreciated they are not necessary as I am comfortable with who I am.



> I've never thought of any of your comments as from anyone 'different'. There are many types of personalities here. I don't think most of us analyse others too much and just take what they say at face value.
> I hope you'll continue to make interesting and useful contributions



 fair enough and thanks


> Were you bullied at school? I agree that the schools have limited power to stop bullying hence I think it is more a parent who can make the difference by talking to their children.




  Yes I was bullied(not physically)just verbally and couldn't wait to leave which I regretted later as I would have liked to continue higher education . The reason why I have done adult study.
  Your more charitable than me .I just don't think the schools/education departments want to tackle bullying its easier to appear to be doing something by producing a anti-bullying policy = all talk no action


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## Tisme (26 April 2018)

"





*60 Minutes Australia*
4 hrs · 


How far would you go to protect your child if you thought they were being bullied?

This father violently attacked a 15-year-old he believed was tormenting his daughter. He says he was defending her, but did he cross the line? The full story 8.30 SUNDAY on #60Mins."


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## Wysiwyg (29 April 2018)

Tisme said:


> How far would you go to protect your child if you thought they were being bullied?
> 
> This father violently attacked a 15-year-old he believed was tormenting his daughter. He says he was defending her, but did he cross the line? The full story 8.30 SUNDAY on #60Mins."



 If the smart ass wanted a go, I would do the same.


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## Tisme (30 April 2018)

Wysiwyg said:


> If the smart ass wanted a go, I would do the same.




I tend to prefer to do them slowly. Something very satisfying at seeing a bully confounded at the run of bad luck that seems to dog them for years on end.


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## Darc Knight (30 April 2018)

With all these Psychologists and "Experts" in our Society its concerning that we can't fix stuff like bullying.


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## Tisme (30 April 2018)

Darc Knight said:


> With all these Psychologists and "Experts" in our Society its concerning that we can't fix stuff like bullying.




Can't program out survival of the fittest, although the Greens are giving it a good crack.


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## SirRumpole (30 April 2018)

Darc Knight said:


> With all these Psychologists and "Experts" in our Society its concerning that we can't fix stuff like bullying.




I guess because those experts then get accused of "social engineering".


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## Wysiwyg (30 April 2018)

Tisme said:


> I tend to prefer to do them slowly. Something very satisfying at seeing a bully confounded at the run of bad luck that seems to dog them for years on end.



I mentioned on another thread awhile back that one of the worst bullies at high school went on to marry, father children and work in a well paid job. I suppose no one wanted revenge bad enough.


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## Gringotts Bank (30 April 2018)

Darc Knight said:


> With all these Psychologists and "Experts" in our Society its concerning that we can't fix stuff like bullying.



It's simple, but 'experts' in any field love to make things appear more complicated than they are.  Be wary of anyone who starts a sentence with "look, it's a very complex area with no quick fixes", because they are usually ignorant or they're protecting their position.

If I can make something look complicated, I enhance my position.  Since I'm the only one who understands it, I must be special and in-demand.  I ensure my paycheck and status this way.  If the problem is seen for what it truly is - ie. simple - then I lose all that.  I have an investment to protect, and that investment is me and my wage.  Virtually every profession does this.  Having a special lingo helps entrench rarity value.

I would post some more but I'm extremely busy.  Hang on, I have 3 phones ringing, and one is my broker.  See what I did?


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## Tisme (30 April 2018)

Wysiwyg said:


> I mentioned on another thread awhile back that one of the worst bullies at high school went on to marry, father children and work in a well paid job. I suppose no one wanted revenge bad enough.




More tools at our disposal these day. It's never too late...you can still derail him if you feel up to it.


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## Tisme (30 April 2018)

Gringotts Bank said:


> It's simple, but 'experts' in any field love to make things appear more complicated than they are.  Be wary of anyone who starts a sentence with "look, it's a very complex area with no quick fixes", because they are usually ignorant or they're protecting their position.
> 
> If I can make something look complicated, I enhance my position.  Since I'm the only one who understands it, I must be special and in-demand.  I ensure my paycheck and status this way.  If the problem is seen for what it truly is - ie. simple - then I lose all that.  I have an investment to protect, and that investment is me and my wage.  Virtually every profession does this.  Having a special lingo helps entrench rarity value.
> 
> I would post some more but I'm extremely busy.  Hang on, I have 3 phones ringing, and one is my broker.  See what I did?




Yes a straight line is an endangered species


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## moXJO (30 April 2018)

When one of my sons was in year 7, his group of friends was being harassed by one of the year 10 students. 

The year 10 student was apparently the toughest kid in school having knocked out men in the past. Of course he singled out my son. 

Unbeknownst to him I've been training my son to box since he was 4. And he got a shock when my young bloke raised his hands. To cut it short my young bloke tagged him non stop and he couldn't hit him. No knockouts, but reputations were made and destroyed.

After that the bullies reputation was shot. He fell off the top of the social ladder and its a long drop when thats your identity and all you have got.
He dropped out of school in the end.

I felt sorry for the guy.


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## Lantern (1 May 2018)

Got to be careful when victims snap.


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## tech/a (1 May 2018)

moXJO said:


> When one of my sons was in year 7, his group of friends was being harassed by one of the year 10 students.
> 
> The year 10 student was apparently the toughest kid in school having knocked out men in the past. Of course he singled out my son.
> 
> ...




My Grand Daughter 15 was being bullied last year.

So I managed to get her into training with me in Martial arts.

Krav Maga

Everyone should be involved in Martial arts.
You'll learn respect, dedication, commitment.
If you can look after yourself you'll hardly ever
have to use your discipline.

She has only been doing it this year but no bullies
to be seen and a growing friends group.


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