# Political Satire



## basilio (7 December 2020)

*Chinese Citizens Told They Must Condemn Australia’s Human Rights Record, Or Risk Imprisonment     *






A directive from the Chinese Communist Party has obligated all citizens of the mighty and glorious nation of China to publicly criticise Australia’s record of human rights abuses, or risk life-long incarceration in a secret prison camp.

A Communist Party spokesperson said it was each citizen’s patriotic responsibility to speak out against other countries’ suppression of rights, and if they chose not to then there would be ample time to discuss their reasons why at a re-education facility in the country’s north west.

“We ask all people from this magnificent nation to publicly condemn Australia’s human rights record on a state-controlled social media platform of their choosing,” a spokesperson said.

“We know millions of citizens are appalled at Australia’s behaviour. We also know the specific citizens who are not appalled, thanks to our comprehensive surveillance and tracking program. We will be visiting them soon”.

The issue started when the Chinese government posted an image on Twitter – a platform it prohibits its citizens from using – which criticised Australia’s human rights record.








						Chinese Citizens Told They Must Condemn Australia’s Human Rights Record, Or Risk Imprisonment
					

“We ask citizens to publicly condemn Australia’s human rights record on a state-controlled social media platform of their choosing,”




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## dutchie (7 December 2020)

basilio said:


> *Chinese Citizens Told They Must Condemn Australia’s Human Rights Record, Or Risk Imprisonment     *
> View attachment 115973
> 
> 
> ...




China does not know how stupid they look.  They are a joke but the whole world kowtows to them for the $$$$$$.

Australia should lead the way and break away (even though it will cost us in the short term).

We should not take their aggressive sh$t any more.


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## basilio (7 December 2020)

To be clear Dutchie. My post was from the  satirical website The Shovel.


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## dutchie (7 December 2020)

basilio said:


> To be clear Dutchie. My post was from the  satirical website The Shovel.



Ooops. Sucked right in.
                                                                    But the gist of my post is valid.


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## basilio (7 December 2020)

dutchie said:


> Ooops. Sucked right in.




Seriously  ??  I have often quoted The Shovel as a satirical  news site.  Is it that difficult to see the difference between "reality" and satire. (Although if you checked out my contribution to the Corona Virus thread maybe it would have been impossible to split the difference)

I have heard we live in post satirical world where no matter how outrageous the satire there are many real events that outperform it.

This is a slight segue but the performance of  Rudy Guiliani star witness at a inquiry into the Michigan  election results has been universally recognized as shattering the satirical ceiling.









						Trump’s Star ‘Election Fraud’ Witness Was a Glorious Train Wreck
					

So bad that Giuliani had to shush her.




					www.thecut.com
				











						Let’s Check In on Rudy Giuliani’s Star Witness
					

A scintillating update re: freelance IT consultant Mellissa Carone.




					www.thecut.com


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## basilio (7 December 2020)

Anyway Dutchie you have plenty of company with big name people who can't tell a satirical story from reality and promote it regardless.

*Ex-Trump lawyer Sidney Powell falls for satirical story about ‘ballots’ in a lake*
*The claim originated on a satire news site that wrote about ballots for NBC's 'The Voice.'*

Mikael Thalen

Sidney Powell, the former attorney for President Donald Trump, promoted a fake news story on Twitter alleging that 3,000 ballots had been discovered in a lake.
The tweet, which suggested that the alleged ballots had all been filled out for the president, has since been shared nearly 27,000 times.









						Ex-Trump lawyer Sidney Powell falls for satirical story about 'ballots' in a lake
					

Sidney Powell, the former attorney for President Donald Trump, promoted a fake news story alleging that ballots had been discovered in a lake.




					www.dailydot.com


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## moXJO (7 December 2020)

basilio said:


> Seriously  ??  I have often quoted The Shovel as a satirical  news site.  Is it that difficult to see the difference between "reality" and satire. (Although if you checked out my contribution to the Corona Virus thread maybe it would have been impossible to split the difference)
> 
> I have heard we live in post satirical world where no matter how outrageous the satire there are many real events that outperform it.




Im sorry but that was closer to the truth then satire. Maybe they need to practice a bit.


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## wayneL (7 December 2020)

dutchie said:


> Ooops. Sucked right in.
> But the gist of my post is valid.



Apparently, Dutchie, only people on the right have ever been sucked in by satire.

Nobody on the left, ever, in history of the world, has been sucked in by satire... never ever!

In fact the right is incapable of even creating satire, humour, memes, hyperbole, and probably even a reasonable cheesecake.

... or even sarcasm, but this post does come with a prediction.


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## satanoperca (7 December 2020)

moXJO said:


> Im sorry but that was closer to the truth then satire. Maybe they need to practice a bit.



Show us the truth?

Give you a helping hand. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Betoota_Advocate
_The Betoota Advocate_ has grown to be Australia's most popular satirical news site, garnering a larger readership within Australia than popular U.S. satire site _The Onion_ and Australian site _The Shovel_.


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## basilio (7 December 2020)

satanoperca said:


> Show us the truth?
> 
> Give you a helping hand. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Betoota_Advocate
> _The Betoota Advocate_ has grown to be Australia's most popular satirical news site, garnering a larger readership within Australia than popular U.S. satire site _The Onion_ and Australian site _The Shovel_.




All very well  but it's clear that  too many people just believe whatever stuff they read/are sent - if it suits their purpose.

I highlighted the example of ex Trump lawyer Sidney Powell who blithely retweeted the "Votes in the  Lake" story without  a care in the world.





__





						News satire - Wikipedia
					






					en.wikipedia.org


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## dutchie (7 December 2020)

wayneL said:


> Apparently, Dutchie, only people on the right have ever been sucked in by satire.
> 
> Nobody on the left, ever, in history of the world, has been sucked in by satire... never ever!
> 
> ...



aahh  cheesecake


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## dutchie (8 January 2021)




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## dutchie (13 January 2021)




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## dutchie (19 January 2021)

Most Popular President In History To Be Inaugurated In Secret Behind Giant Wall Guarded By Thousands Of Soldiers
January 18th, 2021




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WASHINGTON, D.C.—President-elect Joe Biden will be inaugurated this week, and due to his incredible popularity with the American people, he will be inaugurated in a top-secret location behind a massive 12-foot wall guarded by 30,000 soldiers. 

"The reason President-elect Biden has to do this is that he's just so incredibly popular," said Don Lemon on CNN. "He has so many rabid fans that they might try to rush the stage as they're overcome with enthusiasm and love for Biden who is by far the most beloved candidate who has ever run for President."
In addition to the 12-foot electric fence topped with razor wire and the 30,000 heavily armed soldiers who have been vetted as Democrats, there will be flying drones programmed to target MAGA hats, a platoon of ninjas, and a moat filled with crocodiles dug all the way around the Capitol Building and White House. 
Biden will then be escorted to a secret underground bunker patrolled by attack choppers where he will give the oath of office in a dark concrete room with all the recording equipment turned off.
"This is a slight break in tradition but it's necessary because Biden is just so incredibly popular and loved by the people," said Nancy Pelosi.
Sources say that Biden will be brought to an undisclosed location after the inauguration to live out his remaining days peacefully until Kamala Harris's inauguration next week.


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## Joe Blow (20 January 2021)

I have begun the process of moving all posts containing political satire, or at least the ones posted in recent times, out of political threads and into this thread.

This will include all posts from websites like The Shovel and Babylon Bee. I do not care if it is left wing or right wing satire, it will all end up here.

Some people are posting satire in political threads as if it is real news, often with false quotes and misleading information. This is being done to score cheap political points and as a method of misleading others.

If this thread is abused, it will be closed.

All posts must contain a link to the original article.


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## PZ99 (20 January 2021)

Good move Joe. I can then just put this thread on ignore and avoid all that crap


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## dutchie (21 January 2021)




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## rederob (21 January 2021)

Here's a prescient cartoon from March 2016:




As a scorecard it's a perfect 10, out of 8.


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## basilio (26 January 2021)

Celebrating Australia Day for all the right reasons..
Read the last sentence thoughtfully.

*“No-One Can Tell Me To Stop Celebrating The Anniversary Of Captain Cook’s 334 Not Out Against The Advancing Japanese Troops At Gallipoli” * 


OPINION: There’s been a fair bit of talk about moving the date of Australia Day recently. But these people don’t have any idea what they’re messing with. 26th January is sacred. Mark my words, it ‘aint moving.

Do all the complaining you want. But buggered if you’ll stop me celebrating Cooko’s triple century against a full-strength Japanese attack on a deteriorating Gallipoli wicket in ‘44-‘45.

It was the making of this country. Bob Hawke gave the nation a day off to celebrate. And yet here we are, trying to mess with it.

For those Australians, or should I say unAustralians, who don’t like it, it’s time for some truth bombs. Gallipoli is one of the toughest grounds to play in the world. They don’t call it ‘The Kokoda Track’ for nothing.

A three month journey on a tall sailing ship to get there. Uncovered wickets in those days as well. And despite everything that was thrown at him, our captain – Captain Cook – stood firm. Stood up, in fact, and said ‘No! We won’t pay our gold mining licence fee just because you tell us to’.

It was a turning point. An uprising. It forged the character of this nation. As Ned Kelly famously said about the game at the time, “I come from the land down under”.

But of course these whingers wouldn’t know that because they don’t study history. Don’t know the significance of that day. Don’t understand the blood that was spilled. And they never will because they don’t want to listen.

Shame.

_Robbo Johnson, The Shire, Sydney








						“No-One Can Tell Me To Stop Celebrating The Anniversary Of Captain Cook’s 334 Not Out Against The Advancing Japanese Troops At Gallipoli”
					

Gallipoli is one of the toughest grounds to play in the world. They don’t call it ‘The Kokoda Track’ for nothing.




					www.theshovel.com.au
				



_


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## basilio (26 January 2021)

A  nuanced view on the election of Joe Biden as President.

*America Breathes Sigh Of Relief After Inaugurating Reassuringly Mediocre President*

Chanting ‘USA! USA!’ Americans have excitedly taken to the streets to celebrate after electing a president that commentators have gushingly described as ‘okay’ and ‘much better than the last guy’.

Emotional voter Emily Vanson said it was hard to put into words how she was felling. “Biden is just so – adequate! I was listening to him speak and the hairs were standing up on the back of my neck. It’s January, I forgot my jacket,” she said.   

New Hampshire man John Twomey said he was proud of his country today. “I look at Joe Biden and I think, there’s a man who is fair to middling. It’s an incredible feeling. He’s just so moderately inspiring. On a good day”.

Ohio woman Jenny Appleby said this was one for the history books. “I’ll be telling my grandkids about the day we, as a nation, defied the odds, looked inside our hearts, were inspired by all of the exceptional people in this country, and elected a man that isn’t a total disaster”.









						America Breathes Sigh Of Relief After Inaugurating Reassuringly Mediocre President
					

“Biden is just so – adequate!"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## basilio (29 January 2021)

Hard nosed  prelates at the Vatican refute profound miracle.

Vatican dismisses miracle claim after blind man sees right through Boris Johnson ​ 





*Vatican officials have moved to dismiss claims of a divine miracle after a blind man claimed to see right through prime minister Boris Johnson.*

A team of British ophthalmologists were perplexed when Simon Williams, who has been blind since birth, was able to offer an almost complete description of the current leader of the country and the motives behind his every move.

The Vatican-appointed Miracle Commission were informed of the ‘miracle’ and launched an immediate investigation into the circumstances surrounding the case.

“Sure, Mr Williams gave a pretty good description of Boris Johnson, but upon questioning, we quickly clarified how that information was obtained,” a Vatican spokesman told convened reporters.

“This man is living in a council flat consisting of two bedrooms when he himself was the sole occupant of the residence.
“He is also unemployed and on disability benefits.
“His flat is on the 22nd floor of a high rise block, whose lift is working about as often as a recent 2:2 graduate.

“So, when Mr Williams tells you that Johnson is a vainglorious fascist of deplorable merit, whose sole goal in life is to destroy the last vestiges of civilised society by surrendering the needy to a life of lonely poverty and starvation, he is only at the beginning of his detailed articulations.”

The spokesman said as a result of the investigation they had now identified a miracle of a very different type for consideration.

“It was clear to us that there was only one miracle at work here. The ungodly one that saw the Tory Party re-elected in 2019.

“That means we are one miracle short of the Canonisation of one Margaret Thatcher.

“Jesus Christ.”








						Vatican dismisses miracle claim after blind man sees right through Boris Johnson
					

Vatican officials have moved to dismiss claims of a divine miracle after a blind man claimed to see right through prime minister Boris Johnson.




					newsthump.com


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## basilio (29 January 2021)

And to back up the non-miracle.

‘There was no way to predict this’ explains man to nation full of people who predicted this​






*Boris Johnson has spoken of his regret at the 100,000 lives lost to coronavirus in the UK, insisting that there is no way anyone could have predicted this happening, seemingly unaware of the fact that millions of people predicted that precisely this would happen.*
“I’m very sorry for the loss of life, but this is not something anyone could have predicted,” explained the prime minister to the nation, before thousands and thousands of people began pointing to their predictions from almost a year ago saying that this was precisely what would happen if the government response continued being completely xhit.

Office worker Simon Williams told us, “I do accounts for a living, and I knew nothing about PPE or viruses twelve months ago, but by the middle of March it was clear to even me that if the government continued ballsing up the acquisition of PPE and avoiding the lockdown measures that were _clearly_ necessary, then tens of thousands of people would die unnecessarily.

“Then, as cases started rising again in the Autumn, it became obvious to anyone with a rudimentary understanding of the principle of cause and effect that waiting too long to lock down for a second time would once _again_ lead to thousands of unnecessary deaths.
“Then myself and millions of other people said any talk of relaxing the rules over Christmas would lead to thousands of unnecessary deaths, but they did it anyway.

“Then shortly after Christmas we pointed out that sending kids back into schools to mingle with each other while cases were so high would lead to thousands of unnecessary deaths – fortunately they realised their mistake, just 24 hours too late. Though on the plus side at least they are getting quicker at recognising a xuck up when they implement one.

“So yes, when they say no-one could have predicted this, I would politely point out they are talking out of their arses.”









						'There was no way to predict this' explains man to nation full of people who predicted this
					

Boris Johnson has spoken of his regret at the 100,000 lives lost to coronavirus in the UK, insisting that there is no way anyone could have predicted this happening, seemingly unaware of the fact that millions of people predicted precisely this would happen.




					newsthump.com


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## basilio (8 February 2021)

*Rambling, Deranged Florida Man Claiming To Be President Of United States      *





A Florida man, believed to be in his 70s, has been telling passers by that he is the leader of the free world.

As authorities were called to the scene, witnesses say the man was erratic and anxious, at one point claiming he had been robbed. “He kept saying ‘They stole it from me. They stole it from me’,” one witness said.                                                                               

“I just assumed he was talking about his wallet or his phone. But it turns out he was referring to an election. It was very odd.

“I asked him if perhaps ‘The Election’ was the name of his cat or dog, and where he had last seen it. But then he started ranting about the size of his inauguration crowd, and his television ratings, so I decided it was probably best just leave it. I gave him a few dollars and asked if he had a place to stay tonight”.

Authorities say they tried to contact the man’s friends but none were available.








						Rambling, Deranged Florida Man Claiming To Be President Of United States
					

News you can believe in




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## dutchie (12 February 2021)

Would not put it past the Democrats.

*In Mail-In Impeachment Vote, Senate Convicts Trump 8275 To 3*

February 10th, 2021




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WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a historic move, the U.S. Senate decided to switch to voting by mail for Trump's second impeachment trial. After all the votes were counted by an intern in a back room with no cameras, the Senate ruled to convict President Trump of incitement to violence by a vote of 8275 to 3.

"Our holy democracy has spoken," said Senator Chuck Schumer. "Do not ask any questions or you are a blasphemer against the sacred sacredness of our vote. Everyone can go home now!"
A couple of troublemaking Senators attempted to overthrow the Constitution by bringing up the point that there are only 100 Senators, making it impossible to arrive at a tally of 8275 to 3, but they were quickly removed from the Senate Chambers and condemned for "attempting to suppress the votes of people of color."
The Senate then moved on to other business, passing universal healthcare by a margin of 320,000 to 4.


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## basilio (13 February 2021)

Just  my observation.

Political satire consists of presenting real  information in a humorous way to make a point. And of course it is used when regimes forbid political discussion and making a  pointed joke of the (real) situation still manages to highlight the issue.

Creating impossibly fictitious scenarios like Dutchies previous contribution  (from Babylon Bee I guess) ?) is just dumb, nasty xhit.

Anyway back to political satire.  I think we do need to be far more sensitive and understanding of people who have fallen for the most outrageous conspiracy theories that currently  circle the globe. And there is QAnon Anonymous support  groups out there with a message.

Check it out.


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## basilio (13 February 2021)

Lest we forget


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## orr (13 February 2021)

The QAnonamous vid Above is excellent Bas;  But it gave me a terrible flashback to Sen Sprog Patterson's suggestion to sell 'Blue Poles' to pay down Government debt... equally as insane as 'trickle down' I guess...

And sadly understanding Satire like irony is unfortunatly an intellectual hurdle to far for some...It is our collective burden to carry these benighted souls, to help and guide them as best we can. Your work in this regard above is appreciated. This can also apply to poor 'Sprogger's'...


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## basilio (13 February 2021)

The Q Anon Anonymous story has, IMV, a number of layers of subtlety and political irony.  

Yes Q Anon and fellow travelers have absolutely crazy and quite poisonous views on Satan worshiping cabals, lizard people running the planet and  the evil empire of George Soros etc.

But the touche at the end is just as pointed. On any rational basis the relentless  over exploitation and damage  of the planet leading to certain environmental degradation is a very real example of a shared fantasy.  Yet our economic system is based on continuing this practice until we fall off the environmental cliff. The belief in trickle down economics as somehow a real way of  improving the lot of people in poverty is equally bizarre - but widely shared.  

Food for thought ?


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## dutchie (18 February 2021)

It's time to short Starbucks et al.

New York Times Calls For Banning Coffee Shops After Learning People Can Have Uncensored Conversations There
February 17th, 2021






"We must ban coffee shops, as people can have conversations there that journalists are unable to fact-check," wrote Taylor Lorenz in a piece for the _Times _this morning. "I went up to a group in a coffee shop just the other day and sat down with them so I could record their conversation, fact-check, and dox them. They told me to 'go away' and that 'you're really weird and kinda scaring us a bit, lady' -- is this the future of democracy? People participating in free speech without any journalists around to monitor them?"










						New York Times Calls For Banning Coffee Shops After Learning People Can Have Uncensored Conversations There
					

NEW YORK, NY - The New York Times has called for the banning of coffee shops after learning that people can have 'unfettered conversations' in them.'We must ban coffee shops, as people can have conversations there that journalists are unable to fact-check,' wrote Taylor Lorenz in a piece for the...




					babylonbee.com


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## bellenuit (19 February 2021)




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## basilio (19 February 2021)

* Nadal Knocked Out Of Australian Open By 5G Tower, Facebook Reports      *






World number two Raphael Nadal has been bundled out of the Australian Open by a mobile telephone tower, Facebook is reporting.

According to the social media site which no longer allows news, the Spanish champion won the first two sets, but began to lose concentration after chem trails were sprayed over the court early in the third. The distraction allowed the 5G tower to take control of the match, spreading COVID-19 throughout Melbourne Park, before winning the final three sets easily.                                                                               
Facebook reported that there was controversy late in the fifth set when the chair umpire – who was called Q – began to share secret government intel about the coming awakening.

After the match, Nadal spoke of the up-and-coming 5G tower as a genuine threat to the competition. The 5G tower said it was just happy to be able to get through to the next round and encouraged people not to get vaccinated.


_Support The Shovel. Or follow us on Email | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram_








						Nadal Knocked Out Of Australian Open By 5G Tower, Facebook Reports
					

"Nadal lost concentration when chem trails were sprayed over the court early in the third set"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## dutchie (20 February 2021)

*To Save Time, The Babylon Bee Will Now Just Republish Everything Biden Says Verbatim*

The Bible tells us to work smarter, not harder. Or, better yet, don't work at all if you can help it. You can look it up. It's in the Proverbs somewhere.


That's why we're announcing today that we will simply be republishing everything Joe Biden says word for word rather than spending a lot of time and effort writing satire.

We at The Babylon Bee realized we were spending all this time trying to satirize Joe Biden when, frankly, he just can't be satirized. He's doing all the hard work for us with statements like "You ain't black!" and, of gun violence, that "150 million people have been killed since 2007."


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## basilio (1 March 2021)

A clever joke ? A comment on the  required qualities of public figures ?


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## basilio (5 March 2021)

As the Morrison Government and Christain Porter rail against the suggestion that the "recent unpleasantness" should be grounds for an independent investigation... consider this.
*
Christian Porter Forced To Stand Aside After Allegedly Gifting Cartier Watches To Staffers      




*


Federal Government Minister Christian Porter has been forced to temporarily stand down from his role as Attorney General after claims he had given expensive watches to staff members as part of an office rewards scheme.

Prime Minister Scott Morrison said he was appalled by the accusations and that Mr Porter’s actions, if true, were immoral, potentially illegal and out of step with the public’s expectations.                                                                                

“I am appalled by this. This is disgraceful. Let’s let the legal process run its course. But we simply cannot have a government minister accused of these types of things remaining in this position.

“He has been instructed to stand aside. If he doesn’t wish to do that, he can go,” Morrison said before Mr Porter agreed to comply with the request.

An independent investigation into the alleged conduct will be launched immediately.









						Christian Porter Forced To Stand Aside After Allegedly Gifting Cartier Watches To Staffers
					

"He has been instructed to stand aside. If he doesn’t wish to do that, he can go"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## basilio (5 March 2021)

Plus. The updated version of the Governments Ministerial Code of Conduct and behaviours that warrant standing down.









						Government Releases Updated Ministerial Code Of Conduct
					

The code includes the full list of unacceptable behaviours for government Ministers.




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## basilio (18 March 2021)

Couldn't resist this after the utter baloney from ScoMo and Porter about not bothering to actually read the allegations repeatedly put to them. 

*ABC Says It Doesn’t Have Time To Read The Defamation Proceedings Launched By Christian Porter          * 

The national broadcaster says it unfortunately doesn’t have time to read the defamation action launched by Attorney General Christian Porter.

“It just doesn’t seem relevant or important,” a spokesperson for the ABC said.                                                                               

“If we took every accusation from every werido out there seriously, we’d never get any work done”.

Mr Porter has been on extended mental health leave, taking *the time-out he needs to get support from qualified legal professionals.  (Hmm)  *His legal team sent defamation proceedings to the ABC, which the national broadcaster says they are vaguely aware of.

“There’s a letter from Christian Porter’s legal team sitting on my desk, but I haven’t seen it and the claims are clearly false,” a senior executive said.

“We’re innocent. Surely that’s the end of the matter”.








						ABC Says It Doesn’t Have Time To Read The Defamation Proceedings Launched By Christian Porter
					

“It just doesn’t seem relevant or important"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## basilio (6 April 2021)

* “I Don’t Use A Desk, Mate”: Scott Morrison Refuses To Take Responsibility For Latest Sex Scandal  * 

Scott Morrison has distanced himself from the latest scandal at Parliament House which saw a male staffer perform a sex act on a female MP’s desk, with the Prime Minister claiming ‘I don’t use a desk, mate’.

In an interview with Sky News Australia, Mr Morrison said, “I know Australians understand this; they know that I don’t sit at a desk doing work all day. That’s just not something I’ve ever done. Working is what other people do. I pose for photographs in sports guernseys and build cubby houses for my teenage kids.  

https://www.theshovel.com.au/2021/03/23/i-dont-use-a-desk-mate-scott-morrison-responsibility/


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## basilio (6 April 2021)

This riposte from Fiona Patten on her election into Parliament was brill..

_Patten's candour was on show from her first speech to the Victorian Legislative Council when she announced she was "the first former sex worker to be elected to a parliament anywhere in Australia".
She recalls a silence deepening and settling across the rococo chamber "like a low-pressure trough".

Her follow-up, however, was the zinger of a practised provocateur and humorist: "I am sure that the clients of sex workers have been elected in far greater numbers before me."
_








						'I hadn't had a lot of sex lately': Fiona Patten, from sex worker to politician
					

The politician has just released a new book, called Sex, Drugs and the Electoral Roll.




					www.smh.com.au


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## basilio (11 April 2021)

*New-Look Morrison Promises To Cover Up Rapes More Respectfully From Now On *

An emotional Scott Morrison says he has listened and learned and will be more respectful when covering up sexual assaults that take place in his workplace from now on. 

“We all have to do better on how we cover up crimes,” Mr Morrison said at a special press conference yesterday.                                                                                
“We need to think about the language we use. Is there another way of saying ‘get the office steam cleaned immediately and make sure this never gets out’? Is there a more courteous way to background against a victim’s partner? We need to ask these tough questions of ourselves”.

He said women are sick and tired of being ignored. “We need to listen to what they have to say and only _then_ begin the process of suppressing and diverting attention away from their issue. We owe them that.

“I know all this because I have a mother”. 








						New-Look Morrison Promises To Cover Up Rapes More Respectfully From Now On
					

“We all have to do better on how we cover up crimes"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## basilio (15 April 2021)

When one  remembers the criminal, vicious. lying stuff served by by Scumo Ministers and  SFA consequences this piece hits it's mark.

*Christine Holgate Starting To Wish She’d Just Taken A Photo Up A Man’s Trousers * 






Former Australia Post CEO Christine Holgate was kicking herself today, saying that she should’ve just taken an unsolicited, sexually inappropriate photograph of a stranger rather than awarding four executives a bonus watch.

“What was I thinking? If only I’d hid in a bush and taken photos of a woman in public without her knowledge, I’d still have my job right now. But instead I had a brain-snap and gave a corporate gift,” she said.                                                                                

*Ms Holgate, who was forced to stand aside from her job after pressure from the Prime Minister, said if she’d had her time again she would’ve paid $26.7 million too much for land next to an airport, owned by Liberal Party donors, rather than spend $20,000 on four watches.*

“I mean that’s obvious now, but at the time I just didn’t think of it. But if I’d done that, the Prime Minister would never have called for my resignation. I’d still be in a job. Probably promoted.”

*The former Australia Post chief said she made the grave error of rewarding people rather than bullying them. “Now that I’ve had time to reflect on the situation, I can see that I should’ve called those executives lying cows, or at the very least relentlessly bullied them on Facebook. I’ve still got a lot to learn”.*









						Christine Holgate Starting To Wish She’d Just Taken A Photo Up A Man’s Trousers
					

"If I had my time again I would’ve paid $26.7 million too much for land next to an airport, rather than $20,000 on four watches. I'd still have a job right now"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## Knobby22 (18 April 2021)

This should be satirical.


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## basilio (19 April 2021)

Knobby22 said:


> This should be satirical.
> View attachment 122973




Indeed it does. And the scum at News Ltds do it in Hearts, Trumps, Spades and Clubs.


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## basilio (31 May 2021)

Honest Government Ads are produced by a shoe string made at home producer with some feisty female talent who don't mind telling all and sundry how much ratxuckery the Scumo government routinely run as their operating system.

On their 5 year anniversary,* supported solely by hundreds of  individual Patreons*,the women presenters have made their own shop and tell. Great insight into reality programming.

I think they are a small business well worth supporting with a few bucks a month.


----------



## basilio (4 June 2021)

*  New Covid Payment To Provide $500 For Those Working 20 Hours A Week, Or $22 Million For Those Who Own A Chain Of Furniture, Bedding And Electrical Stores                *







A new ‘temporary COVID disaster payment’ announced by the Morrison Government today will provide $500 a week for those who ordinarily work more than 20 hours a week, $325 a week for those who ordinarily work less than 20 hours a week, or $22 million for those who don’t do any work at all but who own a large chain of discount department stores.

Announcing the new measures, the Prime Minister Scott Morrison clarified that the payment will only apply to people with less than $10,000 or more $1.5 billion in liquid assets.                                                                                                          

“Those who have independent means of supporting themselves for a week would agree that reaching out for Commonwealth taxpayer-funded assistance is not something they would consider reasonable. Unless of course they have the means of supporting themselves for a thousand years, in which case taxpayer-funded assistance is totally reasonable,” he said.

Mr Morrison said a lot of people were doing it tough. “I know one guy who is offering 40 months interest free on a new television. That’s a long time not to receive any interest”.

We think this new initiative is the fairest way to ensure people affected by lockdown can get back on their feet again or buy another waterfront holiday home,” Mr Morrison said.


_Tip us a few bucks. And follow us on Email | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram_








						New Covid Payment To Provide $500 For Those Working 20 Hours A Week, Or $22 Million For Those Who Own A Chain Of Furniture, Bedding And Electrical Stores
					

"It will only apply to people with less than $10,000 or more $1.5 billion in liquid assets"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (8 June 2021)

*When Political Satire becomes political comment.*

*  Now that we know the government spends its time trawling through The Shovel’s tweets, we’ve started posting data that it might find useful …         *





Hello government ministers!

Please find below our tweets, packed with useful analysis and information. We hope this service is of assistance.


----------



## bellenuit (17 July 2021)




----------



## basilio (21 July 2021)

*Christian Porter Ordered To Pay $550,000 To Jo Dyer, In Humiliating Backdown By Jo Dyer      * 






Former Attorney General and supposed legal expert Christian Porter has been ordered by the Federal Court to pay theatre and film producer Jo Dyer more than half a million dollars, in what he described as a humiliating backdown by Ms Dyer.

Ms Dyer won Federal Court proceedings to stop lawyer Sue Chrysanthou acting for Mr Porter in his defamation proceedings against the ABC.                                                                                

*A smiling Mr Porter said he felt vindicated by the decision. “It’s pretty clear who the winner is out of all of this,” he told journalists outside the court. “And that’s the guy standing in front of you with a half-million bill to pay off.

“I know whose shoes I’d rather be in right now, and it certainly isn’t those of the person who’s about to have all of their legal costs paid by me”.

Mr Porter said this proved he had come out of the case untarnished. “The judge couldn’t be any clearer. I am to pay $550,000 in costs, Ms Dyer is to receive $550,000 in costs. How absolutely embarrassing for her”.*









						Christian Porter ordered to pay $550,000 to Jo Dyer, in humiliating backdown by Jo Dyer
					

“I know whose shoes I’d rather be in right now, and it certainly isn’t those of the person who’s about to have all of their legal costs paid by me”.




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## IFocus (21 July 2021)

basilio said:


> *Christian Porter Ordered To Pay $550,000 To Jo Dyer, In Humiliating Backdown By Jo Dyer      *
> 
> 
> View attachment 127643
> ...





That whole thing is a train wreak no doubt will be glossed over by the usual suspects.


----------



## Knobby22 (22 July 2021)

Not satire but reality.
Our opposition leader in Victoria tries to please everybody and ends up pleasing nobody. Both recent.


----------



## basilio (23 August 2021)

*   Matt Canavan First Person Over 5 To Throw Temper Tantrum About The Wiggles                *







Nationals Senator Matt Canavan was found kicking and screaming on a supermarket floor today after his mummy told him the Wiggles had decided to add more cultural diversity to their line-up. It is the first time someone older than a toddler has lost their **** over the children’s group.

Canavan was visibly distraught, confused about why a band that has been teaching inclusiveness and friendship since 1991 would practice inclusiveness and friendship.     

In a press conference today the Senator said he used to be a fan of The Wiggles, especially the song _Toot Toot, Chugga Chugga Big Red Car _because the Chugga Chugga “implied the car used a steam boiler powered by Australian coal”.

But the press conference took a turn when Canavan suddenly shat his nappy and threw his dummy across the room as tears washed clean streaks down his coal-smudged face.

He began to yell, “But now they’re all woke and lefty, I hate them! I hate them! What’s next, are they going to let a woman drive the big red car?”

It appears that Canavan’s Wiggles culture war goes back further than this latest slight. In 2017 he attempted to grant permits to drill Dorothy the Dinosaur for fossil fuels. The permits were denied on the grounds Dorothy had not died and gone through the million-year breakdown required to convert her into crude oil. Canavan reportedly responded by complaining Dorothy was an “inner-city latte-sipping, eliteasaurus who doesn’t care about Australian jobs”.

Following Canavan’s latest meltdown, Barnaby Joyce has unexpectedly found himself as the most adult person in the Nationals Party and later this week will literally put the matter to rest by letting Canavan have a botty and a nap after a big day.








						Matt Canavan First Person Over 5 To Throw Temper Tantrum About The Wiggles
					

"I hate them! I hate them! Make them stop mummy!"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (23 August 2021)

And lets not forget the most important issue around the administration of  our immigration laws.
*Exactly what is in it for the Minister and his friends ?*

*Australia Offers Immediate Asylum To All Au Pairs Trapped In Afghanistan *





Saying it was a humanitarian crisis that demanded the nation’s urgent attention, Immigration Minister Peter Dutton has confirmed Australia will do whatever it can to rescue and relocate any full-time nannies currently working in Kabul.

“When you look at those pictures coming out of Kabul, your mind goes straight to ‘are there any carers who could provide quality in-home services to my friends’ kids?’,” Mr Dutton said.                                                                                

“The desperation I’m seeing on faces is real. Do you know how hard it is to get a decent full-time au pair these days?”
The offer means that Australia may need to increase its refugee intake by as much as four or five. “That’s the kind of nation we are though. 

We do what we have to do to help,” Dutton said.
To facilitate the airlift, Australia will send five RAAF cargo planes to enable enough space for each of the five au pairs.









						Australia Offers Immediate Asylum To All Au Pairs Trapped In Afghanistan
					

"It's desperate. Do you know how hard it is to get a full-time nanny these days?”"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (2 September 2021)

*Inspired By Gerry Harvey, Woman Pays Back 27% Of Her Centrelink Overpayment        * 







A Sydney woman has returned $41.18 of a $150 Centrelink overpayment, in a gesture of goodwill she says was motivated by billionaire Gerry Harvey.

The Harvey Norman founder announced today that his company would pay back $6 million of the $22 million Jobkeeper payments it received, inspiring Grace McManus to make a 27% repayment of her own.                                                                                

*“I was just so taken aback by Gerry Harvey’s generosity, I wanted to match that gesture,” the unemployed mother of two said. “Seeing him dig into his own pocket like that to pay back a small proportion of the taxpayer money that was never meant for him, it made me want to do the right thing too”.

Treasurer Josh Frydenberg was glowing in his praise for the Sydney woman, saying she should receive an award for returning a quarter of the funds not intended for her. “I’d just like to personally thank Ms McManus for this gesture. Of course we don’t expect people to give back Centrelink overpayments – that’s up to them. But this shows great leadership. Good on her,” he said.*

Many news websites around the country confirmed they were planning to run front-page stories about the woman’s generosity.









						Inspired By Gerry Harvey, Woman Pays Back 27% Of Her Centrelink Overpayment
					

“I was so taken aback by Gerry Harvey’s generosity. I wanted to match that gesture"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (22 September 2021)

*Peter Dutton Relieved Melbourne Streets Finally Free From African Gangs* 






Defence Minister Peter Dutton says it’s good to have a break from African gangs roaming the streets of Melbourne, terrorising residents.

In a radio interview this morning, Mr Dutton said he remembers a time when people in Melbourne had been afraid to leave their homes. “It was terrifying. Men roaming the streets, damaging property, shutting down traffic, smashing in windows. Entire streets of Melbourne under siege. Luckily that’s all stopped,” he said.                                                                               

Asked about his opinion on the actual riots taking place in Melbourne right now, Mr Dutton said they were ‘different’. “They’ve just got a different feel to them, haven’t they? Can’t place why”.

Victorian Opposition Leader Matthew Guy said he was also pleased the African gangs had disappeared, although warned Victorians that they may re-appear before next year’s state election.









						Peter Dutton Relieved Melbourne Streets Finally Free From African Gangs
					

Matthew Guy warned African gangs may return before the next election




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (9 October 2021)

Confirmation Bias Goggles (1970)​





Confirmation Bias Goggles were the first wearable technology to be wired directly into the brain. In addition to the pinhead-sized speaker which perpetually broadcast the statement 'Of course you're right!' into the auditory cortex, the goggles' sensors could also switch off those parts of the brain that deal with troublesome emotions and feelings such as empathy, decency and healthy scepticism.

By tapping into the wearer's biases, the goggles literally deleted undesirable objects from the wearer's field of vision. Sights that were too dominant to be erased completely were visually falsified to validate the wearer's preconceptions.

By 1971, the state had adapted the goggles for use in schools. Children were told precisely what to think and what their personal opinions as adults would be.  Unsurprisingly, everybody who tried the goggles, without exception, thought that they were a great idea.


----------



## basilio (22 October 2021)

*  Wilcannia residents wondering which NSW cabinet member they need to xxxk to get funding for their community   * 






Following allegations that former premier Gladys Berejiklian set aside millions of dollars for a project in her secret partner’s electorate while she was Treasurer, many in Wilcannia are wondering which cabinet members they have to screw in order to get adequate funding for their community. 

“That’s the official application process isn’t it? I mean, I don’t usually go for chinless, white toffs, but I’m willing to take one for the team if it means we can finally get funding for vital projects,” said Wilcannia resident Annie James. “Except I won’t go near Paul Toole, you have to draw a line somewhere.”                                                                                

Although some are concerned that a secret affair with a member of Parliament could lead to another ICAC investigation, locals have been quick to point out that government inquiries in remote and Indigenous communities never lead to any concrete action.  

“The idea that sleeping with a cabinet member would secure funding is laughable. All budget decisions are made based on firm economic reasoning. It’s just that housing and water treatment isn’t as essential as a gun club,” treasurer Matthew Kean said, adding “particularly if that gun club is going to be used by white, National party voters.”

While no one at the Premier’s office would comment on rumours of an affair to secure funding, many sources within the government say they do intend to xxxk remote communities. 








						Wilcannia residents wondering which NSW cabinet member they need to fuck to get funding for their community
					

"That's the official application process isn't it?"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (12 November 2021)

In late breaking news there was a astonishing announcement from the PM's office.

*Scott Morrison claims he was never Scott Morrison  *  

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has made another astonishing backflip, claiming he never actually was Scott Morrison, nor ever claimed to be. It comes a day after the PM said he never mocked electric vehicles even though 2019 footage exists of him doing so. 

When questioned as to what spurred the change of heart on himself he said, “This is no change of heart, I’ve never been Scott Morrison. Not once. It’s simply not true.









						Scott Morrison claims he was never Scott Morrison
					

"I’ve never said I was Scott Morrison. Not once"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (29 November 2021)

*Pauline Hanson condemns use of term ‘Black Friday’, saying ‘all Fridays matter’        * 







One Nation leader Pauline Hanson has moved a motion in the Senate declaring that ‘All Fridays Matter’, following an emotional speech in which she claimed the term Black Friday is racist against white people.

“Once again we see white people being marginalised in this country,” Ms Hanson said. “I refuse to allow this blatant discrimination to continue. Today I demand that the government says, on record, that all Fridays matter”.                                                                                

The Queensland Senator said the country was in danger of being swamped by Black Friday sales.

“Like so many Australians, my inbox has been inundated with ‘Black Friday this’, ‘Black Friday that’. Granted there have been some wonderful bargains. But as yet not a single mention of White Friday. So typical of this country’s disrespect for white people”.

Ms Hanson later moved a second motion to wish all Australians a white Christmas.








						Pauline Hanson condemns use of term ‘Black Friday’, saying ‘all Fridays matter’
					

"We're in danger of being swamped by Black Friday sales"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## Investoradam (3 December 2021)

Knobby22 said:


> This should be satirical.
> View attachment 122973



5 jabs in, vaccination passports, still no freedom, lock downs 18 months in! all from a man eating a bat!
and one who questions this is an extreme right winger!

just how limited are you lefties?


----------



## Investoradam (3 December 2021)




----------



## Investoradam (3 December 2021)

if any one has been following these




			https://www.youtube.com/c/PaulineHansonsPleaseExplain/videos


----------



## wayneL (3 December 2021)

Investoradam said:


> if any one has been following these
> 
> 
> 
> ...




These are pure genius.

I guess it remains to be seen whether they translate into votes, but spectacularly funny and so on the mark hahaha!


----------



## wayneL (9 December 2021)

This made me LOL


----------



## wayneL (9 January 2022)

Secret recording of Herr Dan, addressing Here Klaus.


----------



## wayneL (21 January 2022)

Best.
One.
Yet.

Hahahaha


----------



## cynic (7 March 2022)

https://babylonbee.com/news/putin-receives-nobel-prize-in-medicine-for-ending-covid-pandemic


----------



## moXJO (8 March 2022)

Americans Who Cowered Under Government Oppression For 2 Years Urge Ukrainians To Die For Freedom
					

U.S.—Across the country, millions of Americans who cowered under oppressive government mandates for two years are standing in solidarity with the Ukrainian people, urging them to give their lives for their freedom.




					babylonbee.com


----------



## Knobby22 (20 March 2022)

I don't understand why so many people hate politics. The end is really funny.


----------



## moXJO (20 March 2022)

Knobby22 said:


> I don't understand why so many people hate politics. The end is really funny.




Why is this documentary in the 'satire' thread?


----------



## wayneL (21 March 2022)

It's not really satire as such, but #sorrynotsorry


----------



## basilio (26 March 2022)

*Hillsong finally becomes mainstream religion, after leader charged with concealing sex crimes   * 






After years of being cast aside as a fringe movement, Hillsong Church can finally be considered a conventional, mainstream religion, after its founder Brian Houston was charged with allegedly concealing information about child sexual abuse.

Mr Houston said they had been fighting for acceptance within the broader Church system for years.                                                                      

“Sure, we follow all of the core principles of Christianity, like accruing property and not paying taxes. But concealing sex crimes really does make up the Holy Trinity.

“Even having a Prime Minister as part of our flock didn’t garner us the respect of one of the big boys. We were increasingly worried we’d become a joke, or be forced to blackmail weird lonely celebrities, like Scientology. We just weren’t ready to do that just yet.









						Hillsong finally becomes mainstream religion, after leader charged with concealing sex crimes
					

"Finally, we'll no longer be treated as a fringe movement"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (26 March 2022)

Latest news on the question of the Prime Ministers relationship with the head of Hillsong Church.

*   “I’ve never even heard of Brian Houston,” Morrison says                *





Following reports that Hillsong leader Brian Houston has been stood down from his role for ‘acting inappropriately’ with women, Prime Minister Scott Morrison says he’s never even heard of the guy. 

“Sorry, Brian who?” Morrison said when quizzed on his relationship with the controversial religious leader today. “Nup, sorry, not ringing any bells. Wouldn’t know the guy if he was standing next to me on a stage at Qudos Bank Arena in front of 30,000 people at a Hillsong Conference in 2019, I’m afraid”.                                                                               

Pushed further to recall detail of the decades-long friendship between the two men, Mr Morrison said he was coming up blank. “I mean, apart from referring to him in my maiden parliamentary speech, inviting him to travel with me to meet the President at the White House, and regularly calling him for ‘spiritual guidance’ whenever I’ve forgotten to respond to an epidemic or natural disaster, I can honestly say I’ve never heard of the guy.

“I mean, I’ve heard of the city in Texas obviously. Is that what you mean? No? Ok, I’ll have to ask Jenny then. Maybe she’s stood on stage with him at Sydney’s largest football stadium, saying a prayer for Australia”.

Morrison later responded to pressure to reveal further detail, saying he would set up an inquiry to determine whether he knows Brian Houston or not.









						“I’ve never even heard of Brian Houston,” Morrison says
					

“Sorry, Brian who?”




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## StockyGuy (26 March 2022)

Shall be interesting to see if Hillsong, as a brand, dwindles away to (almost) nothing now.


----------



## wayneL (26 March 2022)

I may be totally wrong, have not been really following Scotty's religious predilections; but doesn't he belong to some other pentecostal church, not Hillsong?


----------



## StockyGuy (26 March 2022)

wayneL said:


> I may be totally wrong, have not been really following Scotty's religious predilections; but doesn't he belong to some other pentecostal church, not Hillsong?




Yeah, he belongs to another Assemblies of God church, called Horizon Church.


----------



## basilio (5 April 2022)

Morrison  is attempting to stem and deflect  the  stories from the Liberal Party  highlighting exactly what type of leader he is.
Check out this effort.

*Morrison does emergency photo op in Lebanese kebab shop to prove he’s not racist          * 







Chanting “I can’t be racist if I eat kebabs,” a frantic Scott Morrison has set up a last-minute photo shoot showing him preparing a lamb kebab at a Lebanese restaurant in Western Sydney.

“I love kebabs! They’re my favourite food!” Morrison posted on Instagram, forgetting that he had posted just a week ago that his favourite food was Indian curry.                                                                                

“And my favourite type of kebab is a Lebanese kebab. I have lots of Lebanese friends,” the caption continued.

Morrison has been accused by several people within the Liberal Party of using racist remarks during a preselection battle with Lebanese opponent Michael Towke in 2007. But the PM hoped to quash those claims by dressing up as a kebab shop owner and posting about in on social media.

“Lebanon is a country in the Middle East. The capital of Lebanon is Beirut. Baba ganoush,” the Instagram caption continued, before randomly listing culturally relevant Lebanese words.

It was later revealed the photo shoot actually took place in a Turkish kebab shop.








						Morrison does emergency photo op in Lebanese kebab shop to prove he’s not racist
					

“I love kebabs! They’re my favourite food!”




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (5 April 2022)

_When "satire" says it all better than any "straight"story_

*    Government revealed as elaborate April Fool’s Day prank        * 






Australia’s Federal government is a joke, it has been revealed.

“I can’t believe you guys fell for it actually,” Josh Frydenberg said on behalf of the government, describing what is thought to be the longest set up ever for a joke.                                                                               

“We’ve been giving so many hints along the way. Bringing pieces of coal into Parliament, promising to build carparks in marginal electorates but then not actually building them, nipping off on holiday when the country is in crisis. I thought we were being too obvious to be honest.

“But then over the past few weeks we decided to dial it up even further … to give people one last chance to figure it out. We had people calling the PM a psycho. Concetta Fierravanti-Wells literally stood up and said – _in Parliament_ – that the Prime Minister was unfit to be Prime Minister, and no-one twigged. It was right there in her speech!”

He said there have been clues stretching back years. “I mean really – a government that covers up an alleged rape, backgrounds against the victim’s partner, calls the victim a lying cow, sends the minister in question on paid leave and then claims to be listening to women. I mean it’s simply not plausible that a government would do that,” he said.

“And that’s just that start of it. We totally fxcked up the vaccination roll-out during the biggest pandemic in 100 years, when that was literally the only task we had. And then 12 months later we fxcked up the roll out of rapid antigen tests. You can’t make that sort of shxt up … actually, turns out you can”.

The Treasurer said the prank had been years in the making. “Oh yeah, from day 1 we were setting this up. Do you remember a few years back when I misplaced $60 billion? _Billion_, not million. That’s more than the annual GDP of a lot of countries. I personally thought it was too ridiculous, but the guys said give it a go and see what happens. And everyone just went along with it”.

Mr Frydenberg said he thought sending people away on empathy training courses in 2021 would be the straw the broke the camel’s back.

“I thought we were going to give the game away to be honest. It was too much. I even said to the guys, ‘Let’s just hold off on this one, it’s too ridiculous, we’ll get found out.

“But they proved me wrong, because they went ahead with it anyway. Let’s be clear here, empathy courses aren’t even a thing. It’s just something we made up! And then, after all of that – and this is where I thought the whole thing was going to fall over – Morrison comes out and says, ‘I’m listening to women!’ For real! I’m crying!

“But everyone fell for it and we’re still in government, so I guess we’ll just keep going”.









						Government revealed as elaborate April Fool’s Day prank
					

“I can’t believe you guys fell for it"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## moXJO (6 April 2022)

basilio said:


> _When "satire" says it all better than any "straight"story_
> 
> *    Government revealed as elaborate April Fool’s Day prank        *
> 
> ...



@Joe Blow 
Satire thread.


----------



## basilio (6 April 2022)

moXJO said:


> @Joe Blow
> Satire thread.




Next time I'll just have to rewrite it in my own words won't I ?  Frankly there is nothing in that story that couldn't be also written,*  in a similar way, *in a biting analysis of how the ScoMo government has  been run. 

After all that is the  point of good satire - telling the truth with a sting and laugh.


----------



## moXJO (6 April 2022)

basilio said:


> Frankly there is nothing in that story that couldn't be also written,*  in a similar way, *in a biting analysis of how the ScoMo government has  been run.



That's why.
The truth is that close to satire that it muddies the waters. People tend to remember the lie though.


----------



## basilio (8 April 2022)

Now this story can't possibly be unture could it ?  Perhaps ScoMo has offered Christian Porter  the Commisionars role as a carrot to persuade him to stand for the next parliament ?









						Government agrees to anti-corruption agency: “We’re just looking for a mate to run it”
					

"Someone who knows corruption inside out"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (8 April 2022)

Could this possible be true ? That a key element of the electorate that votes the Liberal Party into power does so because they quietly recognise the PM is on their side ?  Just the old tap on the side of the nose trick.

*“The PM is definitely racist,” Liberal party says in desperate attempt to lift poll numbers     * 

Looking to shore up the Coalition’s vote at the upcoming election, Liberal Party strategists have reassured Australians that the Prime Minister is definitely racist, after some questioned the accounts of Michael Towke and Concetta Fierravanti-Wells.

“There’s been some conjecture about whether the claims made recently are true, and we just want to reassure the average Australian voter who is terrified of having their job being stolen by a brown person, that they definitely are,” a Liberal Party operator said in a statement.                                                                              
“If you’re scared about people on boats, if you don’t like the idea of getting served a coffee by someone with a funny accent, then we hear you”









						“The PM is definitely racist,” Liberal party says in desperate attempt to lift poll numbers
					

"We just want to reassure Australians that all the allegations are true"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (8 April 2022)

On the other hand of course there is the absolute determination of the PM to establish his non racist credentials.  He has been  adamant that he hasn't a racist bone in his body (Fact Check. Does he actually have any bones ? ) Should this be enough to lay all the bad mouthing to rest ?

*                       Some of my best friends aren’t racist”        * 







Prime Minister Scott Morrison has strongly rejected claims he undermined a rival candidate on the basis of race in his 2007 preselection battle, saying it is simply not possible given he has several friends who are not racist.

“It’s simply not in my character. Not everyone is aware of this, but I actually know a lot of people in the non-racist community. Some of them I consider close friends,” he said.                                                                               

“Just last week I had coffee with someone who isn’t racist, so I think it’s fair to say I know this community pretty well”. 

Asked to name some of these people, the PM was dismissive. “Look, I’m not going to provide a list of people for you right here and now, that wouldn’t be appropriate. But they do exist and I’m happy to sign a statutory declaration at a later date to confirm that they do”.









						“Some of my best friends aren’t racist”
					

"I know several people in the non-racist community"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (8 May 2022)

Again Political Truth masquerading as a joke.

*         Liberal Party enacts ‘Bring out John Howard in case of emergency’ procedures       * 






Out of options and uncertain of what else to do in the face of an onslaught from independent candidates, Liberal Party MPs have smashed the glass and removed the little John Howard that sits on a wall at Liberal Party headquarters in Sydney.

“Emergency! Emergency!” deputy leader Josh Frydenberg shouted, being careful not to get Howard’s eyebrows stuck in the glass as he pulled the little guy out of the box.                                                                                

Frantically reading the instructions as he held Howard in his hand, Frydenberg used a small key to wind up the former Prime Minister, aimed him towards the campaign trail and watched him spring to life and immediately run off to a media event to say something sexist.

“It’s incredible how quickly he’s ready to go. Wind him up, let him spray bull**** everywhere and he immediately takes everyone back to the 1950s”.

A party spokesperson said the emergency procedures were used sparingly. “This is something we definitely only use as a last resort once every federal election and at every state election and three to four times a year when we can’t think of anything else to do”.  









						Liberal Party enacts ‘Bring out John Howard in case of emergency’ procedures
					

"Quick! Smash the glass and pull him out!"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (23 May 2022)

The election  results  are all wrong.  One needs to take an overall perspective as this analysis provides.
*
Coalition ‘clear winner’ (when using carryover credits from previous elections)     * 





The Coalition won the 2022 election in a landslide, if you use an accounting method that allows you to add votes from previous elections, Sky News presenter Andrew Bolt has explained.

In a media conference this morning former Environment Minister Sussan Ley echoed Bolt’s analysis, saying the Coalition would be continuing on in Government, based on the calculations she had made.                                                                                

“At the last election we received 51.5% of the vote – an additional 1.5% over and above what we needed. In the 2016 election we received 50.36%, that’s 0.36% in surplus. And at the 2013 election 53.49%, well above the target rate.

“So when you add those carryover credits together, that gives us an extra 5.35% of the vote, pushing this year’s two party preferred vote to 53.35%. I think you’ll agree that that’s a pretty decisive victory for the Coalition”.









						Coalition ‘clear winner’ (when using carryover credits from previous elections)
					

"We're well above the required target"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (26 May 2022)

*Voldemort demands Tanya Plibersek apologise for ‘hurtful’ comparisons to Peter Dutton                *






Lawyers for the Dark Lord, Lord Voldemort have demanded an ‘immediate and full’ apology from Tanya Plibersek after the Labor MP compared their client to former Defence Minister Peter Dutton.

Plibersek made the comments during a radio interview yesterday, noting the similarities between the terrifying villain and the Harry Potter character. Voldemort’s lawyers say the comparison was hurtful and unnecessarily cruel.                                                                                                            
“How would you feel if you were compared to a man who has locked away small children, jokes about a country being devastated by climate change and who boycotted the apology to the Stolen Generation? Our client is not just going to sit back and take this”.

The ruthless practitioner of the dark arts was unavailable for comment. So was Lord Voldemort.









						Voldemort demands Tanya Plibersek apologise for ‘hurtful’ comparisons to Peter Dutton
					

"It was unnecessarily cruel"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (22 June 2022)

*Outstanding opportunity for John "Pork Barrel" Barilaro to  highlight exactly why he is most suited to this gilt edged job he created.

Inquiry into Barilaro’s New York posting to be conducted by John Barilaro *





NSW Premier Dominic Perrottet has confirmed that, after an extensive global search, the person to lead an inquiry into why former deputy premier John Barilaro was chosen for a $500,000-a-year job created by former deputy premier John Barilaro, will be former deputy premier John Barilaro.

The role was initially awarded to an impeccably qualified woman within the public service, but the offer was later withdrawn after John Barilaro said he wanted the position.                                                                                  

In a media conference this morning, Perrottet said it was important that the person leading the investigation had an intimate understanding of the issues. *“John both established the New York role, and was successful in securing that role, *so I don’t think there’s anyone more qualified to investigate this, frankly”.

Opposition MPs have strongly condemned the inquiry appointment, saying there is a clear conflict of interest. Perrottet says he will take their comments on board and has asked John Barilaro to prepare a report on any potential conflicts.









						Inquiry into Barilaro’s New York posting to be conducted by John Barilaro
					

"He's highly qualified for the role"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## Knobby22 (22 June 2022)

basilio said:


> *Outstanding opportunity for John "Pork Barrel" Barilaro to  highlight exactly why he is most suited to this gilt edged job he created.
> 
> Inquiry into Barilaro’s New York posting to be conducted by John Barilaro *
> 
> ...



Why does the NSW need an ex state polly in New York anyway?


----------



## SirRumpole (22 June 2022)

Knobby22 said:


> Why does the NSW need an ex state polly in New York anyway?



We don't.


----------



## basilio (22 June 2022)

Knobby22 said:


> Why does the NSW need an ex state polly in New York anyway?



Because John Barilaro created the position and then asked for the job .  Pays $500k a year. Lot's of Pork there..


----------



## basilio (22 June 2022)

How to spend $25m on an aboriginal flag.


----------



## sptrawler (23 June 2022)

There is only one thing funnier than satire, reality.
A year is a long time in politics and politics has a lot to do with how people see an issue. The more things change, the more they stay the same.🤣
10 months ago it was just an anti renewable Govt that wants to pay coal and gas to stay available. Now it is a Green Govt that wants to do the same, shock horror.
Not only wants to, but has to.

*BAD GOVT*
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2021-08...lor-subsidies-coal-gas-power-plants/100410770 *26 August 2021*
The Federal Minister for Energy and Emissions Reduction, Angus Taylor, is battling to get support from the states and territories for his *plan to get electricity retailers to pay coal and gas-fired power generators to keep operating.*
The federal government wants to introduce a Physical Retailer Reliability Obligation (PRRO) *to ensure there is enough energy available in the National Electricity Market (NEM) at all times to fill gaps when wind and solar power cannot meet demand*.


*GOOD GOVT*
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-06-20/capacity-mechanism/101166480 * 20 June 2022*
A draft plan for a new "capacity mechanism", aimed at ensuring stability in the national electricity grid, c*ould see coal and gas generators paid for reliable power supply.*
The federal government's Energy Security Board (ESB) has been tasked with designing the new mechanism, which would pay generators through an auction process for the capacity they can provide.
*The new system would also pay for generators to be available when needed.

The ESB said introducing such a tool by mid-2025 was going to be vital to ensuring much more capacity enters the grid in coming decades, and a smooth transition to net zero emissions by 2050.*


----------



## Knobby22 (24 June 2022)

sptrawler said:


> There is only one thing funnier than satire, reality.
> A year is a long time in politics and politics has a lot to do with how people see an issue. The more things change, the more they stay the same.🤣
> 10 months ago it was just an anti renewable Govt that wants to pay coal and gas to stay available. Now it is a Green Govt that wants to do the same, shock horror.
> Not only wants to, but has to.



Except the same people as per the original are still against it. The Vic Govt and the Greens.
Bit of convincing to do and that requires a long term plan rather than just what Taylor offered at least to get the the Victorian government on side.


----------



## basilio (24 June 2022)

*        Murdoch divorce settlement: Jerry to get Australia   * 






Rupert Murdoch’s recently estranged fourth wife Jerry Hall will take over control of Australia as early as next week, after the two came to an agreement over their divorce settlement this morning. 

Under the agreement, Mr Murdoch will retain control of the United States and Britain, with the ‘scraps’ – as one Murdoch ally described it – going to Hall.                                                                               

Hall – 65 – said she needed a hobby and had always wanted to run a small-to-medium sized country in the Asia-Pacific region. “I’m really excited about getting to know more about this important part of the company,” she said in a statement.

Hall said she’ll make an announcement on the country’s Prime Ministership “in due course”.









						Murdoch divorce settlement: Jerry to get Australia
					

Jerry Hall will take over control of Australia, after the two came to an agreement over their divorce settlement.




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## sptrawler (24 June 2022)

Knobby22 said:


> Except the same people as per the original are still against it. The Vic Govt and the Greens.
> Bit of convincing to do and that requires a long term plan rather than just what Taylor offered at least to get the the Victorian government on side.



The problem is, as was proven with the latest energy issue over East, it is one thing saying you have a plan. 
It is completely different, when you are shown you don't have a plan you have a hope and a dream and how you are going to make it a reality no really have no idea.
Labor are saying they are going to do this that and he other, but in reality it is waffle and fluff, even the experts aren't sure how this is going to go.
That's where making a commitment to a reduction number pulled out of thin air, becomes a real issue, because you will be held to it even if it is unachievable in the time frame despite your best efforts.
I ordered a car on 1st of March and I want it now, but the manufacturer can't even make a guess when it will be ready and they're making the thing.


----------



## basilio (7 July 2022)

Pointing out the obvious.  I cannot see how insurance companies are going to continue insuring against "natural" disasters at this rate. 
So what happens when areas become uninsurable ?
*NSW residents facing fourth once-in-a-hundred-year event since last January   * 







As flood waters continue to rise across the state, residents of New South Wales are weathering their fourth once-in-a-lifetime event since the start of last year.

Penrith resident Helen McMannis said she would be telling the grandkids about the floods of 2022, after she’d finished telling them about the floods of 2021, and the floods and bushfires of 2020.                                                                               

I haven’t seen a weather event of this scale during a Sydney summer since summer,” she said.

Jude Johnson, whose property was burnt down two years ago before being covered with a dust storm, then flooded, then overtaken by mice, said his street was underwater yesterday. 

“I remember the last once-in-a-hundred year event like it was just last year. You won’t see something as bad as this again, until something worse comes along in a few months,” he said.








						NSW residents facing fourth once-in-a-hundred-year event since last January
					

"I remember the last once-in-a-hundred year event like it was just this year"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (8 July 2022)

So how well do we * really* know Peter Dutton ?  Is it possible there is a kinder, gentler man underneath that head kicker persona ?
Let's consider the facts.

* “Having only been in Parliament for 21 years, Australians haven’t had the chance to see the real me yet” by Peter Dutton       * 






“Now that I’m Opposition Leader, Australians will finally have a chance to see the real Peter Craig Dutton. After all, I only joined federal Parliament in 2001 – barely twenty years ago. Voters simply haven’t had a proper opportunity to get to know who I really am.

It’s pretty hard to expect people to judge me on the eighty or ninety times I’ve used asylum seekers as a political tool, or the four-hundred or so times I’ve made disparaging comments about various minority groups in this country. That was just a two-decade phase I was going through. It’s hardly a reflection of my true character.                                                                                  

How can people know me? They haven’t had the chance to see or hear from me. Sure, the radio interview I have with Ray Hadley might be on one of the highest rating radio programs in Sydney, but it’s is only once a week. And it’s with an interviewer who is entirely on-side with my political values. Not exactly a window into my soul.  

Some desperate lefty Twitterarti losers think Australians already know me. But those idiots haven’t seen my softer side. I mean, for goodness sake, I’ve only held a senior government ministry for the past nine years. It’s hardly enough time for people to get a sense of who I am. I’m much more caring and compassionate than you think. And if you disagree, I’ll sue you.

People might think my act of walking out during the Sorry speech to Parliament said something fundamental about my character. But I’ve since made the calculation that it is not favourable to my prospects as Prime Minister and so I now regret it. End of story.

As I’ve always said, ‘Judge a man on his carefully crafted persona when he’s vying to be Prime Minister, not on the words he’s said, the things he’s done, the people he’s supported, the causes he’s stood up for, or the people he’s disparaged in the past’.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to do a photoshoot for the Telegraph of me holding a puppy in a countryside meadow”.








						“Having only been in Parliament for 21 years, Australians haven’t had the chance to see the real me yet” by Peter Dutton
					

"I’m much more compassionate than you think. And if you disagree, I’ll sue you"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (12 July 2022)

*Boris Johnson resigns to spend more time figuring out who exactly his children are* 







British Party Liaison Boris Johnson has confirmed that he will be stepping down from his position, saying he was looking forward to finally being able to spend some quality time working out just how many women he has impregnated, and how many of those have given birth to his children.

In a speech today, Johnson thanked the millions of Britons who might be his children, as of 2022.  “Thank you for being part of what may be the biggest Conservative majority since 1987. I’m immensely proud of the achievements of the House of Commons under my leadership.” It is understood the ‘House of Commons’ is the nickname he has given to his testicles.                                                                                                            
Johnson has agreed to stay on as caretaker party liaison, despite not being actively discouraged from doing so, until a new liaison can be found. People are scrambling to look under couches, behind the fridge, and in the No. 10 bins to find a replacement of suitable prowess so the former liaison can get on with the important work of not getting his public stink on the rest of the party.

The process of determining exactly who Johnson’s children are is expected to be a lengthy process as there are no clear frontrunners and few are willing to step up and openly confess to being in the position.









						Boris Johnson resigns to spend more time figuring out who exactly his children are
					

"I'd like to thank the millions of Britons who might be my children"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## Knobby22 (13 July 2022)

basilio said:


> *Boris Johnson resigns to spend more time figuring out who exactly his children are*
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I will miss him though.
An entertainor and erudite but not with qualities suiting the position e.g. ethics.


----------



## SirRumpole (13 July 2022)

basilio said:


> How to spend $25m on an aboriginal flag.
> 
> View attachment 143191



Pretty expensive tokenism.


----------



## basilio (22 July 2022)

Back to the Future. Peter Dutton reports from Gilead.

* Dutton returns from Gilead study trip with new ideas to revitalise Liberal party  * 





Federal Opposition Leader Peter Dutton arrived in Canberra yesterday ‘rejuvenated and re-energised’ after two weeks touring Gilead strongholds in the South and Midwest.

Dutton met with some of Gilead’s top officials and said he took inspiration from their work. “They’re doing a lot of interesting stuff over there – with education, with religion, in the way they’re pushing women’s issues into some exciting new areas.                                                     

“Denigrating woman has been a strength of the Liberal Party’s for some time of course, but you can’t become complacent. I’m looking forward to sharing what I’ve learnt with the broader team”.

He said the Liberal Party could learn a lot from Gilead. “It’s obvious to me that we lost the last election because we became too woke. What Gilead taught me is that we need to get back to focusing on fundamental issues that are important to Australians, like protecting women’s sport from trans people and overhauling our Marxist education system”.








						Dutton returns from Gilead study trip with new ideas to revitalise Liberal party
					

"They're doing a lot of exciting stuff over there"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (22 July 2022)

We are not supposed to put "Political Satire" stories in the formal political discussion threads.

However if you want to get a good summary of the political chicanery situation in Oz this story sums it up exceptionally well.

*    Victoria, NSW neck-and-neck in thrilling Corruption State of Origi*n               








Pundits are struggling to pick a winner in this year’s Corruption State of Origin as the two sides go head-to-head in a battle to see who can more comprehensively puck over their constituents through the use of nepotism, fraud, bribery and just run-of-the-mill thithouse behaviour.

NSW has enjoyed an unbeaten run in recent years, with names like Berejiklian, Maguire and Obeid going down in Origin folklore. This year’s series looked headed for another easy NSW win after former vice captain John Barilaro skilfully created a $500k-a-year job in New York and then awarded it to himself – dubbed an early contended for corrupt move of the series.                                                                                                           
But Victoria hit back yesterday, with an onslaught of corruption, branch-stacking, nepotism, forged signatures and misuse of public money, leading some commentators to suggest the southern state might edge in front. “It was an awesome display. I particularly loved how the Victorian captain then suggested he was unaware of any of the behaviour – giving everyone the don’t argue. That’s Origin at its best,” one commentator said.

Just as Victoria felt they had their rival’s measure, NSW responded late with a finding that journeyman John Sidoti had lobbied a council to rezone his parent’s properties.









						Victoria, NSW neck-and-neck in thrilling Corruption State of Origin
					

"Victoria has hit back after NSW gained an early lead"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (4 August 2022)

The high Road for Peter Dutton

*              Positive start for Dutton, graph in The Australian shows* 






Opposition leader Peter Dutton has made a strong start in his campaign to unseat Anthony Albanese, with an analysis in _The Australian_ showing he has a significantly larger chunk of their pie chart.

Despite Dutton being named as preferred PM by just one in four of those surveyed, a spokesperson for _The Australian_ said he took up well over half of their chart. “This is a bigger piece of the pie chart for Dutton than even we expected when we briefed our graphic designer. And he has a much bolder colour than Albanese too. What a great result for the Coalition”.                                                                               

He said it was easy to get blindsided by numbers and over-analysis. “But the proof is in the pudding, or the pie chart, as we like to say. The more you look at this, the more it becomes clear that Albanese is in a lot of trouble come 2025”.

An editorial in _The Australian_ said the poll was proof that the Coalition needed to shift further to the right.









						Positive start for Dutton, graph in The Australian shows
					

"Albanese is in a bit of early trouble, as we expected"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (4 August 2022)

And now something truly farcical  from the political creature who spent 9 years in office with the opportunity of "examining nuclear power".
From the same creature who received numerous reports pointing out nuclear power is simply not competitive in any way shape or form with renewable or even fossil fuel based power.

*Dutton calls for sensible debate about installing rooftop nuclear reactors on every home* 






Opposition leader Peter Dutton says it is high time Australia had an honest and informed debate about the benefits of supplying the nation’s energy needs through rooftop nuclear fission technology.

“There are a lot of silly ideas floating around about solar and wind and such. But I think it’s time we put an end to the games and started talking about the more obvious solution of splitting atoms on suburban rooftops,” Dutton said.                                                                                                            
The Liberal leader said the nuclear option was infinitely more reliable. “You’re not reliant on the sun shining. You’re not reliant on it being windy. All you need is a nuclear moderator, a reactor coolant, some control rods, a containment system, a steel pressure vessel and a few hundred kilos of enriched uranium and you’re away. It’s that simple. And yet we have literally millions of potential nuclear reactor sites just sitting there, going unused. It’s madness”.

Under the Coalition’s plan, households would receive subsidies for installing nuclear reactors, which Dutton says would boost the economy. “Think of the thousands of jobs created in the local nuclear reactor installation industry,” he said.

Households would be given a new ‘grey’ bin for kerbside nuclear waste collection.









						Dutton calls for sensible debate about installing rooftop nuclear reactors on every home
					

“It’s time to have an honest conversation about splitting atoms on suburban rooftops”




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (5 August 2022)

*Alex Jones claims bloodbath in courtroom was faked       * 







Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones has claimed that the footage of complete carnage that supposedly took place in a Texas courtroom was a false flag, and says the scene was actually carried out by crisis actors.

“That’s not real. No way. There’s absolutely no chance that someone would accidentally send their entire text message history to the opposing legal team. That’s not plausible,” he said.                                                                                

“I mean, just think of the implications that would have, having every single confidential text message in the hands of the lawyers prosecuting you. It’s simply not believable that someone would be that stupid”.

Footage of the hearing appears to show Jones absolutely dying on the stand as he realises he’s entire case has fallen apart. But he says it’s all a hoax. “That’s not me. It doesn’t even look like me. Ok, it looks a bit like me. But that’s how good these actors are. Do your own research”.









						Alex Jones claims bloodbath in courtroom was faked
					

"That was a false flag carried out by crisis actors"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## basilio (5 August 2022)

Absolutely priceless . Well worth checking out*
 
The Shovel is hiring a trade commissioner for New York   * 


We are seeking a suitably-qualified industry expert with impeccable credentials and extensive industry experience to be appointed as our New York trade commissioner, before being replaced at the last minute by John Barilaro. 

This is an exceptional opportunity for someone with previous experience in a comedic organisation who is looking to advance their comedy career. Please see full details below and share with anyone who you think might be interested.  

https://www.theshovel.com.au/2022/07/01/the-shovel-is-hiring-a-trade-commissioner-for-new-york/


----------



## sptrawler (7 August 2022)

You don't need loony story tellers to get satire @basilio reality and the truth, is just as good. 😂









						Dutton stoking China threat in 'dangerous election tactic': Wong
					

Peter Dutton has been accused of risking a catastrophic war with China for votes.




					www.canberratimes.com.au
				



Defence Minister Peter Dutton is deliberately stoking conflict with China in "the most dangerous election tactic in Australian history", Penny Wong says.









						China lashes out at Penny Wong for condemning Taiwan missiles
					

The aggressive military exercises were part of a dummy spit response to US House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's visit to Taiwan, which China claims jurisdiction over.




					www.dailymail.co.uk
				



China has lashed out at Penny Wong after she condemned the Communist regime for firing 11 ballistic missiles over Taiwan.


----------



## sptrawler (7 August 2022)

Here is another one @basilio, some bad news regarding alcohol abuse, but some good news regarding tax collection to cover it. We just have to keep cranking wages and welfare to support it.
That's political satire, not some made up tripe, that the gullible chooks pay to read. 
We are seriously worried about the effect of drinking and gambling, but whatever you do, don't stop. 😂 









						Alcohol use harming Australians and costing the community billions each year
					

Loading




					anmj.org.au
				



Alcohol consumption has been estimated to cost Australia almost $67 billion a year in health, workplace and other impacts, including significant personal and community level harms, according to new research released today by Curtin University’s National Drug Research Institute (NDRI).​








						NSW pokie profits surged amid COVID-19 pandemic, data reveals
					

Gamblers in NSW lost $2.17 billion to poker machines in clubs in the six months after the state's COVID-19 lockdown ended last year, a 7 per cent increase on the same period in 2019.




					www.abc.net.au
				



*Profits from poker machine gambling in NSW clubs surged despite the COVID-19 pandemic, State Government data obtained by the ABC has revealed.
Gamblers across the state lost $2.17 billion to poker machines in clubs from June to November 2020, up 7 per cent on the same period in 2019.*










						More than $60 billion lost on Victorian pokies in past 30 years
					

New data reveals Victorians have lost billions dollars on poker machines since they were introduced in the ...




					www.9news.com.au
				



*The figures show more than $66 billion was gambled and lost on pokies in past 30 year*s.





__





						Queensland Pokies Reaching High Records in Australia | Branded Voices | Advertise
					

Branded Voices features content from our marketing partners.  Articles are not created by Native News Online staff and do not reflect the views and opinions expressed in the Branded Voices are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Native News...




					nativenewsonline.net
				




*According to the Queensland government, local players spend around $300 million on pokies every month. During the pandemic, online poker machines have made even a bigger profit. This statistical data doesn’t include the income of offshore online casinos. Otherwise, the reported revenues would be at least twice higher*.


----------



## basilio (7 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Here is another one @basilio, some bad news regarding alcohol abuse, but some good news regarding tax collection to cover it. We just have to keep cranking wages and welfare to support it.
> That's political satire, not some made up tripe, that the gullible chooks pay to read.
> We are seriously worried about the effect of drinking and gambling, but whatever you do, don't stop. 😂
> 
> ...




Yeah. The  decision by governments to legalise poker machines has been a wicked, wicked  pact with the devil. One could certainly make a "satirical" story out of it but  it would be so bitter and twisted. 

To be fair the point about The Shovels work (and other similar sites) is to make one think about current political/social situations through the lens of dark humour.  It is also a way of  highlighting how dishonest/ absurd /*stupid *particular actions are with humour rather than rhetoric or investigation.  

Another critical element of satire is using the defence of humour or "gentle" mockery to avoid being charged with libel.  Good satire is not about "looney story tellers" .  But certainly there are a range of skills and some are much cleverer than others.


----------



## sptrawler (7 August 2022)

basilio said:


> Yeah. The  decision by governments to legalise poker machines has been a wicked, wicked  pact with the devil. One could certainly make a "satirical" story out of it but  it would be so bitter and twisted.
> 
> To be fair the point about The Shovels work (and other similar sites) is to make one think about current political/social situations through the lens of dark humour.  It is also a way of  highlighting how dishonest/ absurd /*stupid *particular actions are with humour rather than rhetoric or investigation.
> 
> Another critical element of satire is using the defence of humour or "gentle" mockery to avoid being charged with libel.  Good satire is not about "looney story tellers" .  But certainly there are a range of skills and some are much cleverer than others.



The shovel is clever, but as usual they have a political motive, which is a shame.
If they were just as critical of the left, as they are of the right, they may have a believable opinion and maybe would focus on social issues rather than just sniping at those with differing political bias.
But they don't unfortunately, in reality the left make just as many mistakes as the right, it is just at this moment in time being left is in vogue.
I try and remain impartial.
As you said:
"One could certainly make a "satirical" story out of it but it would be so bitter and twisted."
Which is true because being left, you can't say anything that may reflect badly on people who are seen as being disadvantaged, but in reality most are disadvantaged through life's choices".
It just not in vogue to say it, but if by chance we are taken by China, it will be a lesson hard learned IMO.
There would be many that will say, I wish I had done it differently, before it came to this. 
There is a reason Britain wasn't over run by the Germans in both World wars, the very same reason that most of the Australian troops were volunteers and now a survey shows that 30% of Australian youth would leave if war broke out. 








						Young Aussies would REFUSE fighting for country and will flee instead
					

Even if China was to launch an unlikely invasion Down Under as in Ukraine with Russia, Australia's young say they would rather flee the country  than take up arms.




					www.dailymail.co.uk
				




That's satire, the media building a better Australia, one brick at a time.


----------



## Smurf1976 (8 August 2022)

A picture I was sent. 

No hypocrisy here.....


----------



## SirRumpole (8 August 2022)

Young Aussies say they would REFUSE to fight for Australia and FLEE the country instead of resisting an invasion because of high house prices: 'Send the boomers... they have the most to lose'​
I'm afraid that if it gets down to fighting in the streets against a well equipped Army of a country with a much higher population, we are done for anyway, the only hope we have is to not let it get t that state.

But yes, baby boomers have a lot to answer for imo, basically shutting young people out of the housing market and causing heaps of resentment along the way, and a lot have moved elsewhere looking for a better deal.

Previous governments haven't cared much about this as they kept getting voted in , but it's something Labor has to look closely at, re-uniting the country and getting a sense of national purpose started again that disappeared with the word 'globalisation'.


----------



## wayneL (8 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> ...but it's something Labor has to look closely at, re-uniting the country and getting a sense of national purpose started again that disappeared with the word 'globalisation'.



I suppose it is possible Hell freezes over... 🤔


----------



## SirRumpole (8 August 2022)

wayneL said:


> I suppose it is possible Hell freezes over... 🤔




Ever the optimist.


----------



## sptrawler (8 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> But yes, baby boomers have a lot to answer for imo, basically shutting young people out of the housing market and causing heaps of resentment along the way, and a lot have moved elsewhere looking for a better deal.



Well Rumpy you shouldn't have done it, you shouldn't have sold your house for the price people were prepared to pay, you should should have said "no that is too much, i'll sell it too you for less than that". 
You shouldn't have made them pay more by dragging them into the house and holding them captive until they had signed on the dotted line, bad on you, I never did that, it's baby boomers like you that give the rest of us a bad name.   😂


----------



## wayneL (8 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Well Rumpy you shouldn't have done it, you shouldn't have sold your house for the price people were prepared to pay, you should should have said "no that is too much, i'll sell it too you for less than that".
> You shouldn't have made them pay more by dragging them into the house and holding them captive until they had signed on the dotted line, bad on you, I never did that, it's baby boomers like you that give the rest of us a bad name.   😂



Yeah if we need to apportion blame, it is not individual boomers. The video I put up of our old friend Milton Friedman (and the Richard Werner addendum) in the inflation thread gives us our best clue.


----------



## macca (8 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> Young Aussies say they would REFUSE to fight for Australia and FLEE the country instead of resisting an invasion because of high house prices: 'Send the boomers... they have the most to lose'​
> I'm afraid that if it gets down to fighting in the streets against a well equipped Army of a country with a much higher population, we are done for anyway, the only hope we have is to not let it get t that state.
> 
> But yes, baby boomers have a lot to answer for imo, basically shutting young people out of the housing market and causing heaps of resentment along the way, and a lot have moved elsewhere looking for a better deal.
> ...




The main reason housing is so expensive is too many immigrants and too low interest rates kept that to enable a false boom.

NO BB that I know personally, is responsible for any of that


----------



## SirRumpole (8 August 2022)

macca said:


> The main reason housing is so expensive is too many immigrants and too low interest rates kept that to enable a false boom.
> 
> NO BB that I know personally, is responsible for any of that



Who do you think let the immigrants in ? It wasn't the millennials it was current or past politicians who are..? Baby boomers in general .


----------



## SirRumpole (8 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Well Rumpy you shouldn't have done it, you shouldn't have sold your house for the price people were prepared to pay, you should should have said "no that is too much, i'll sell it too you for less than that".
> You shouldn't have made them pay more by dragging them into the house and holding them captive until they had signed on the dotted line, bad on you, I never did that, it's baby boomers like you that give the rest of us a bad name.   😂



I haven't t sold my house but if I did i'd want the highest price I could get because I have t o live somewhere and everywhere is expensive.


----------



## sptrawler (8 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> I haven't t sold my house but if I did i'd want the highest price I could get because I have t o live somewhere and everywhere is expensive.



Exactly right, the seller doesn't set the price the buyers do.
If the person can't sell the property they have to drop the price, if people are queuing up to buy the property, the seller will take the highest price offered.


----------



## macca (9 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> Who do you think let the immigrants in ? It wasn't the millennials it was current or past politicians who are..? Baby boomers in general .




The immigrants aren't BBs though, we have to let them in otherwise we have no one to do the basic jobs around the place.

Crops rotting in the fields and no one to pick the stuff, job snobs are real, unfortunately.

I had a discussion with my next generation about work for the dole, they feel that they would rather have people never work in their life than be forced to have to work for the dole.


----------



## sptrawler (9 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> Who do you think let the immigrants in ? It wasn't the millennials it was current or past politicians who are..? Baby boomers in general .



So when the baby boomers die off, house prices will stop rising and so will the importing of skills, because when the baby boomers die all the nasty awful people have gone and only the nice younger people of today will be  left and they will sell their houses cheaper and they wont want to paid to work.
Finally we have the perfect Australia, the baby boomers are gone, and all life's problems are solved.
Australia as the media report it.


----------



## SirRumpole (9 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> So when the baby boomers die off, house prices will stop rising and so will the importing of skills, because when the baby boomers die all the nasty awful people have gone and only the nice younger people of today will be  left and they will sell their houses cheaper and they wont want to paid to work.
> Finally we have the perfect Australia, the baby boomers are gone, and all life's problems are solved.
> Australia as the media report it.



The baby boomers may be gone but their problems will be left behind.


----------



## sptrawler (9 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> The baby boomers may be gone but their problems will be left behind.



No the next generation will just continue on and make new problems, the same as every other generation before them.
The only difference will be every passing generation will be less able to cope with their problems, as the Government interferes more in the name of helping people. When in actual fact all they are doing is making them more and more dependent, less self reliant, less resourceful and less able to deal with adversity.
Until everyone in Australia can afford to buy a house in Sydney, we have failed, a bit like unless everyone who plays the pokies, bets on the horses or goes to the casino wins, we have failed.🤣
There are heaps of jobs available, they should pack up their $hit and go to where the work is, rather than sitting in Sydney waiting for a house IMO. Even if they get a house in Sydney then they will be complaining it should have harbour views, then when they get harbour views they will be complaining it needs maintenance and they don't know how to replace a tap washer. Maybe they could ring up their dad who lives out in Lismore to come and fix it for them.
Rumpy how much do you spend on eating out, netflix, google play, disney on line, uber eats, streaming music, latest and greatest phone plan, tablet, gaming computer, 75" oled t.v? I don't know about you, but we still run a Panasonic plasma 50".😂

You never know, if a war breaks out with China, it will sort out Sydney/Melbourne house prices and making moving to the bush much more attractive.


----------



## moXJO (9 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> The baby boomers may be gone but their problems will be left behind.



The only thing the boomers did wrong was raise a bunch of whinging pu5sys.
So yes I suppose they will "leave their problems behind".


----------



## sptrawler (9 August 2022)

moXJO said:


> The only thing the boomers did wrong was raise a bunch of whinging pu5sys.
> So yes I suppose they will "leave their problems behind".



Yes I was walking out of Woolies the other day and a young guy around mid 20's, big strapping guy about 6" fit as, was sitting there begging. He looked at me and said, "this isn't easy mate", I said "neither is working shiftwork for 50 years. I guess everyone has to do hard sometime.


----------



## sptrawler (10 August 2022)

Another bit of political satire, how life's realities change, when you're in the drivers seat.
Same $hit, different day.
Only the faces change, the hypocrisy stays the same.🤣









						Dutton stoking China threat in 'dangerous election tactic': Wong
					

Peter Dutton has been accused of risking a catastrophic war with China for votes.




					www.canberratimes.com.au
				



Senator Wong told the ANU National Security College on Tuesday that Mr Dutton is making a calculated and reckless attempt to make national security a battleground at the next election.

Mr Dutton this month drew criticism for his comments on regional geopolitical tensions, saying that opting out of a US-led armed conflict in Taiwan was "inconceivable".
The Labor senator ramped up her attacks on Mr Dutton's handling of Australia's national security in a speech today, accusing him of dangerously exploiting the issue for electoral gains.
"Amping up the prospect of war against a superpower is the most dangerous election tactic in Australian history," she said.
"A tactic employed by irresponsible politicians who are desperate to hang on to power at any cost."










						Acting PM says there's little the government can do to stop China's constant criticism
					

As China lashes out against international condemnation of its military drills in the Taiwan Strait, the Defence Minister says a "more respectful" tone from Australia may do little to prevent relations deteriorating again.




					www.abc.net.au
				




The acting Prime Minister insists there is little the federal government can do to ward off constant Chinese criticism of Australia, as Beijing lashes out against international condemnation of its military drills in the Taiwan Strait.
Australia has joined with other nations to condemn Beijing's decision to extend military drills around Taiwan, triggered by a visit to the island from United States House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

Chinese officials said condemnation by Australia was undermining regional peace and stability, and amounted to meddling in its affairs.

Acting Prime Minister Richard Marles dismissed that accusation and said it was up to China whether relations with Australia thawed or deteriorated again.


----------



## basilio (10 August 2022)

*     Basilios view on the Donald Trump FBI raid   * 

I am certainly no fan of Donald Trump –  that is well understood on ASF . But yesterday’s raid by the FBI on the home of a former president sets a dangerous precedent.

A precedent which now means that anyone who evades taxes, attempts to undermine an election, sexually assaults women, manipulates the value of their assets, uses state resources to enrich themselves or aids and abets the overthrow of a democratically elected government will be subject to investigation.                                                                               

Is that the world we want to live in? Where anyone accused of insurrection can be subject to questioning from law enforcement officers?

It’s a slippery slope. Before we know it, regular citizens accused of defrauding the government, concealing evidence, manipulating financial documents, tampering with witnesses or perverting the course of justice will also be held to account.

Or to put it another way, if we simply shrug our shoulders and fail to question the actions of the FBI, soon any old Joe Citizen who is suspected of ripping classified government documents into small pieces and flushing them down the toilet will be obliged to answer to law enforcement, as well as their plumber.

If we don’t ask the hard questions about the potential motives of the FBI now, soon any one of us who buries our ex-wife in a small grave at the side of their golf course in order to gain a tax concession will be treated with suspicion. 

As Trump supporters put it so clearly yesterday, if this can happen to a President, it could happen to anyone who has committed insurrection, assault or fraud. That’s a chilling thought. 

We are on new ground here. As Donald Trump himself made clear, this is the first time a former president’s home has been raided. Proof, if ever we needed it, that the FBI shamefully only targets people who it considers to have committed a crime. Who gave FBI director Chris Wray that authority?

As we made clear earlier, I'm certainly not a Trump supporter. But in today’s partisan world, it would be easy to fall into the trap of cheering on the FBI’s actions, without taking a step back to look at the bigger picture.* If Trump goes to jail, it opens the door for every lying, corrupt, perverted piece of xhit to go to jail too. Is that what we want?*


(Freely adapted from  Support The Shovel with a small donation )









						The Shovel’s view on the Donald Trump FBI raid
					

We're no fans of Donald Trump. But the FBI's raid on the home of a former president sets a dangerous precedent.




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## sptrawler (10 August 2022)

basilio said:


> *     Basilios view on the Donald Trump FBI raid   *
> 
> I am certainly no fan of Donald Trump –  that is well understood on ASF . But yesterday’s raid by the FBI on the home of a former president sets a dangerous precedent.
> 
> ...



Yes hopefully they find something.🤣🤣🤣🤣

It wont be long before we vote on a republic again, this sort of publicity for a republic certainly doesn't bode well for a yes vote.😍


----------



## wayneL (10 August 2022)

I love how the shovel is so one eyed they continually shoot themselves (as do their reader) in the ideological foot.

I mean, I read that shyte... they delude themselves as clever while normal folks  are STDH.


----------



## sptrawler (10 August 2022)

wayneL said:


> I love how the shovel is so one eyed they continually shoot themselves (as do their reader) in the ideological foot.
> 
> I mean, I read that shyte... they delude themselves as clever while normal folks  are STDH.



Yes he seems to be an out of work journalist and his completely one sided view of subjects probably explains his work situation. 🤣
At least if he applied the same critique on the other side of politics, he would be considered humorous and clever, the way he presents is bigoted, biased, discriminatory and bitter.
Probably attracts a similar audience.


----------



## basilio (11 August 2022)

wayneL said:


> I love how the shovel is so one eyed they continually shoot themselves (as do their reader) in the ideological foot.
> 
> I mean, I read that shyte... they delude themselves as clever while normal folks  are STDH.



What a surprise .  How could anyone have possibly imagined that the litany of  insurrections,  political actions,  business scams and  sexual assaults by the Master Tinpot God Emperor might ever be acknowledged by the marching trump army.

Nuh .  None or this ever happened do ya heare !! All just Fake News..

And what about the emails..


----------



## basilio (11 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Yes he seems to be an out of work journalist and his completely one sided view of subjects probably explains his work situation. 🤣
> At least if he applied the same critique on the other side of politics, he would be considered humorous and clever, the way he presents is bigoted, biased, discriminatory and bitter.
> Probably attracts a similar audience.




This.
1) We don't know if the writer doesn't also write quite biting satire against other politicians from the other side of the fence. He well could be.   The topic of this  piece  however was highlighting how an FBI investigation of  Donald Trump is well warranted.

2) The issues raised about Donald Trumps litany of political, business and personal legal issues are well known. Yes the invective was very strong.  And I support it. If people want to believe none of these things every happened, or that this is all "Fake News"  or that this is the *Biggest Witch Hunt Ever  *they can do so.

It just doesn't make it true.


----------



## basilio (11 August 2022)

*Trump Thanks FBI For Kicking Off His 2024 Reelection Campaign*

Politics   ·  Aug 9, 2022 · BabylonBee.com







MAR-A-LAGO, FL — The morning after Trump's Florida home was raided by FBI agents, the former president took the time to thank the FBI for officially kicking off his reelection campaign.

"I would like to thank the F...B...I... remember them, the FBI? How about those beauties, huh?" said Trump to a roaring crowd of thousands outside his resort. "They came into my home to make your favorite president look like a criminal. Such losers, such losers. But everyone still loves me so it's ok. They didn't even find anything! I'm gonna be the President again!"

Sources close to Trump say his first act as President will be to fire his own appointed FBI Director Christopher Wray and replace him with a used dust mop from the Capitol janitor's closet before razing the Hoover building and banishing all FBI agents to Gitmo.

"I'm gonna fire everyone, literally everyone in government," said Trump. Federal Reserve? Gone! EPA? Gone! CIA? Gone! Department of Education? ATF? HHS? Gone, gone, gone!"

The news media responded to Trump's statement by calling him a "threat to democracy worse than Hitler" while tearing their clothes and heaping dust upon the crowns of their heads.

At publishing time, Trump's approval had gone up over 30%, only to plunge again after he made another nasty comment about Mika Brzezinski's facelift.









						Trump Thanks FBI For Kicking Off His 2024 Reelection Campaign
					

MAR-A-LAGO, FL — The morning after Trump's Florida home was raided by FBI agents, the former president took the time to thank the FBI for officially kicking off his reelection campaign.




					babylonbee.com


----------



## basilio (11 August 2022)

And while we are at it.  Another excellent piece of satire from Babylon Bee.

*Enlightened Trump Takes Vow Of Silence*

U.S.   ·  Aug 10, 2022 · BabylonBee.com






NEW YORK, NY — In what many are calling the most powerful 5th Amendment plea ever, enlightened Trump has taken a vow of silence.
"My silence will be the most peaceful, most quiet 5th amendment plea ever," said Trump before taking the vow in the New York AG's office. "I will achieve the lowest amount of decibels of any vow of silence ever achieved. Folks, you haven't seen anything this silent since the Democrat victory party on election night 2016!"

Trump's legal team confirmed that in addition to pleading the 5th, Trump will also be pleading the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 4th Amendments, just to make sure his bases are covered.

"I plead all of them. All of the amendments," said a serene, stoic-looking Trump before he closed his eyes and pursed his lips shut while lawyers passed papers back and forth.

Sources say Trump's vow of silence lasted until he left the building when he gave a 2-hour speech about how his plea was the best, most beautiful plea, maybe ever.  









						Enlightened Trump Takes Vow Of Silence
					

NEW YORK, NY — In what many are calling the most powerful 5th Amendment plea ever, enlightened Trump has taken a vow of silence.




					babylonbee.com


----------



## sptrawler (11 August 2022)

Like I said, let's hope the FBI find something, because if they don't whether it was a witch hunt or not, it will certainly look like one.

Then satire on not, the FBI will be in deep manure, disliking someone is no justification for raiding their house.

But then again discrimination and victimisation seems to be o.k, as long as it is done by the loony left, as was proven with the Margaret Court/ Israel Folau .🤣

As I said I certainly hope the FBI finds something to justify the raid.


----------



## sptrawler (12 August 2022)

As I said life is better than made up satire, it looks as though they are going to have to prove it wasn't a witch hunt by the U.S Government, the shovel should be able to get a great article out of this.🤣
They talk about Russia and China being morally corrupt and targeting their opponents, as usual in a republic, do as I say not as I do.😱
One hopes they have just cause, or it will get very messy IMO.
 Another example of life being better than made up satire.









						Attorney-General breaks silence on raid, Trump agrees search warrant be made public
					

Hours after Merrick Garland said he approved the decision to execute a search warrant, a US outlet reported agents were looking for documents relating to nuclear weapons.




					www.smh.com.au
				




*Washington*: US Attorney-General Merrick Garland has broken his silence following the raid on Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago estate, asking a court to unseal the search warrant due to the “substantial public interest in this matter”.
Seventy-two hours after the unprecedented event sparked a political firestorm across America, Garland finally commented on the issue amid growing fears that an information vacuum would give rise to more conspiracy theories or threats of violence by Trump supporters.


----------



## sptrawler (13 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> As I said life is better than made up satire, it looks as though they are going to have to prove it wasn't a witch hunt by the U.S Government, the shovel should be able to get a great article out of this.🤣
> They talk about Russia and China being morally corrupt and targeting their opponents, as usual in a republic, do as I say not as I do.😱
> One hopes they have just cause, or it will get very messy IMO.
> Another example of life being better than made up satire.



Well we now have the motive for the raid, let's see the trail, this is better than a Hollywood movie.










						FBI removed top secret documents from Trump’s home: officials
					

FBI agents who searched Mar-a-Lago this week removed 11 sets of classified documents including some marked as top secret, the US Justice Department says.




					www.smh.com.au
				



FBI agents who searched former president Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago home in Florida this week removed 11 sets of classified documents including some marked as top secret, the US Justice Department said, while also disclosing it has probable cause to believe he violated the Espionage Act.


----------



## SirRumpole (13 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Well we now have the motive for the raid, let's see the trail, this is better than a Hollywood movie.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



What about a prisoner swap between Trump and Assange ?


----------



## sptrawler (13 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> What about a prisoner swap between Trump and Assange ?



Yep it bodes well for the bandana bloke and the republican movement.🤪


----------



## basilio (13 August 2022)

*FBI reassures nation that nuclear documents Trump stole aren’t in picture book format  * 





The FBI has moved to reassure Americans that the nuclear secrets documents supposedly held at Trump’s Mar-a-Lago home are not the versions with pictures and colouring-in pages, meaning there is no immediate cause for panic.

“He’s got the version with words, so we’re safe for now,” FBI director Christopher Wray explained. “We believe Trump had engaged a children’s author to convert the documents to a bedtime story so he could understand them – “The very hungry nuclear weapon” was the working title apparently – but that process had only just gotten underway when we  executed the raid”.                                                                                                         
The FBI also made clear that the nuclear codes had been changed since Trump left office. “Please be reassured that the code is no longer 0-0-0-0,” Wray said.








						FBI reassures nation that nuclear documents Trump stole aren’t in picture book format
					

“He’s got the version with words, so we’re safe for now"




					www.theshovel.com.au


----------



## moXJO (14 August 2022)

basilio said:


> What a surprise .  How could anyone have possibly imagined that the litany of  insurrections,  political actions,  business scams and  sexual assaults by the Master Tinpot God Emperor might ever be acknowledged by the marching trump army.
> 
> Nuh .  None or this ever happened do ya heare !! All just Fake News..
> 
> And what about the emails..



Bring receipts Bas.
6 years on and nothing. And there were massive accusations that all flopped or were made up. 
What happened to Jan 6 bombshells?
Oh now it's the raid.
There's been dozens of so called "moments before arrest". So far its all been bs.


----------



## basilio (14 August 2022)

DocumentCloud
					






					www.documentcloud.org


----------



## basilio (14 August 2022)

Listen to the full audio of Trump's phone call with the Georgia secretary of state​The hourlong call was a last-ditch attempt by the president to overturn the election results.

In an astounding phone call, President Donald Trump for over an hour berated and threatened Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger, repeating various false claims about voter fraud and begging the Republican official to overturn the election results.









						Listen to the full audio of Trump's phone call with the Georgia secretary of state
					

The hourlong call was a last-ditch attempt by the president to overturn the election results.




					www.nbcnews.com


----------



## sptrawler (15 August 2022)

basilio said:


> Listen to the full audio of Trump's phone call with the Georgia secretary of state​The hourlong call was a last-ditch attempt by the president to overturn the election results.
> 
> In an astounding phone call, President Donald Trump for over an hour berated and threatened Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger, repeating various false claims about voter fraud and begging the Republican official to overturn the election results.



Like I said reality is just as good as satire, Australia has its own Trump, saying that he was robbed of office.    😂
I bet he has been phoning anyone who will listen as well. 😂 









						Kevin Rudd says Australian politicians ‘frightened’ of ‘Murdoch media beast’ in Senate inquiry
					

Former PM says his fear of the Murdoch empire persisted during his time in office and only subsided after he left




					www.theguardian.com
				












						Australian ex-PM Rudd calls for inquiry into Murdoch media dominance
					

Former Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd has called for a major government inquiry into the tight ownership of Australian media by Rupert Murdoch's News Corp, securing more than 46,000 signatures on a petition after just two days.




					www.reuters.com
				












						What next for Kevin Rudd’s Murdoch royal commission push?
					

The lobby group chaired by the former PM – Australians for a Murdoch Royal Commission – says its campaign is still alive, despite the Albanese government’s rejection of its cause.




					www.smh.com.au


----------



## sptrawler (15 August 2022)

The media reved up the muppet pitchfork brigade to get rid of Boris Johnson, now the polls are coming in, the voters don't want him to go. 😂  😂  😂
Oh the irony.









						Tory members prefer Boris Johnson to Liz Truss and Rishi Sunak, poll finds
					

Signs of ‘Johnson nostalgia’ among both party members and 2019 Tory voters




					au.news.yahoo.com
				



In a head-to-head contest between Mr Johnson and Ms Truss, 63 per cent of Tory members would opt for the caretaker PM, compared with 22 per cent support for the foreign secretary.

Results were even more stark in a Johnson versus Sunak contest. Some 68 per cent of Tory members prefer the PM over the ex-chancellor.

A separate Savanta ComRes poll for _The Independent_ also found evidence of “Johnson nostaligia” among 2019 Tory voters.

If the caretaker PM were running as a candidate, 46 per cent of Tory voters would prefer he won, compared to only 24 per cent for Ms Truss and 16 per for Mr Sunak.


----------



## wayneL (15 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> The media reved up the muppet pitchfork brigade to get rid of Boris Johnson, now the polls are coming in, the voters don't want him to go. 😂  😂  😂
> Oh the irony.
> 
> 
> ...



I actually really liked Kemi, and so did the majority. But couldn't have a true conservative could we?


----------



## InsvestoBoy (15 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> The media reved up the muppet pitchfork brigade to get rid of Boris Johnson, now the polls are coming in, the voters don't want him to go. 😂  😂  😂
> Oh the irony.
> 
> 
> ...




How many muppets are members of the Tories in the UK is it like 12 people.


----------



## sptrawler (15 August 2022)

InsvestoBoy said:


> How many muppets are members of the Tories in the UK is it like 12 people.



I wouldn't know, but whoever they are they obviously weren't canvased for their opinion, situation normal. 
The media is having a pile on the mill, best we do as they say, so they can move on and leave us alone. 

It's a bit like here in Aus, the media hammer Morrison for not being accountable and being away when he should be running the State bush fire brigade.
He should be doing more to mitigate the flood problems, he should be getting more RAT's and more vaccines into the country, so he puts himself in charge like the media wanted, now he is in trouble for putting himself in charge. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Magic satire


----------



## SirRumpole (15 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> I wouldn't know, but whoever they are they obviously weren't canvased for their opinion, situation normal.
> The media is having a pile on the mill, best we do as they say, so they can move on and leave us alone.
> 
> It's a bit like here in Aus, the media hammer Morrison for not being accountable and being away when he should be running the State bush fire brigade.
> ...




President Morrison.


----------



## sptrawler (15 August 2022)

SirRumpole said:


> President Morrison.



Yes so many Presidents for so small a population, over the covid period, President Morrison, President Dan, President, Mark, President Annastacia. 😂


----------



## InsvestoBoy (15 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> I wouldn't know, but whoever they are they obviously weren't canvased for their opinion, situation normal.
> The media is having a pile on the mill, best we do as they say, so they can move on and leave us alone.
> 
> It's a bit like here in Aus, the media hammer Morrison for not being accountable and being away when he should be running the State bush fire brigade.
> ...




You are dumber than a turnip


----------



## sptrawler (15 August 2022)

InsvestoBoy said:


> You are dumber than a turnip



That's a bit hurtful, but coming from a parsnip, I guess you have to expect it.


----------



## sptrawler (22 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> The media reved up the muppet pitchfork brigade to get rid of Boris Johnson, now the polls are coming in, the voters don't want him to go. 😂  😂  😂
> Oh the irony.
> 
> 
> ...






InsvestoBoy said:


> How many muppets are members of the Tories in the UK is it like 12 people.






InsvestoBoy said:


> You are dumber than a turnip



It sounds as though it isn't only members of Johnsons party that are annoyed, the voters aren't too pleased either, by the sounds of it.
Obviously too many listening to the media echo chamber, it's pointless having elections, we should just ask the media who they want in the various positions, it would save a hell of a lot of costs. 
Also us turnips wouldn't have to go out to vote, win/win, we don't have to vote and the media doesn't have to waste so much of their time and effort changing our minds, if we get it wrong. 








						Remorse over Boris Johnson exit as Britons rate him more highly than new candidates combined
					

Boris Johnson was forced to resign by party members over a series of scandals, but the Conservative Party members who choose his successor would prefer he stayed.




					www.smh.com.au
				



Once the new prime minister is announced on September 5, Johnson will be able to charge six-figure sums for speeches on the US speaking circuit while he also intends to complete a book on William Shakespeare.

The YouGov survey, in _The Times_ newspaper, indicated that many Conservative voters have “seller’s remorse” over the ousting of Johnson.

The newspaper also commissioned focus group research which found that many people thought the leadership campaign had damaged the Conservative Party.

Richard, a plumber in the marginal seat of Southampton Itchen in Britain’s south, said: “The others have not had to deal with everything he’s had to.

“He stepped straight in and it was Brexit and then it was COVID and now it’s the war in Ukraine. Everybody waffles on about, ‘He should have done this, he should have done that.’ But I’d like to see them in his shoes.”

Voters in the so-called Blue Wall seat of Esher and Walton in London’s south-west felt he had been unfairly ousted.

“They’re picking on minor things. You know, furnishings and wallpaper and making such a big deal about it.* And it’s the media. The media are the ones that turn everyone against him.” 😂*


----------



## InsvestoBoy (27 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Also us turnips wouldn't have to go out to vote, win/win, we don't have to vote and the media doesn't have to waste so much of their time and effort changing our minds, if we get it wrong.






sptrawler said:


> “They’re picking on minor things. You know, furnishings and wallpaper and making such a big deal about it.* And it’s the media. The media are the ones that turn everyone against him.” 😂*


----------



## sptrawler (27 August 2022)

InsvestoBoy said:


> View attachment 146012



Nice advert.
I wonder who funded that, oh I forgot its doesn't matter these days, as long as it supports the narrative.


----------



## sptrawler (29 August 2022)

Politics makes strange bedfellows. 
Good to see they have found a common charity, to offload some of their millions to.


----------



## wayneL (29 August 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Politics makes strange bedfellows.
> Good to see they have found a common charity, to offload some of their millions to.
> 
> View attachment 146057



I don't find it strange at all, totally consistent from both of these Komrades


----------



## sptrawler (29 August 2022)

wayneL said:


> I don't find it strange at all, totally consistent from both of these Komrades



Yes IMO they look like Twiddle Dee and Twiddle Dumb, working up a brain fart, by the look on their faces Kevs closer.🤣


----------



## sptrawler (31 August 2022)

Here is a great example of political commentary not being careful of what they wished for.
Reading both articles shows that the political parties ideology isn't much different. 
These articles are from the same reporter and I can understand his frustration, but he is adding to the problem, not solving it IMO.
If he spent as much time promoting answers, rather than just highlighting the problems, he may get more traction IMO.
That is the underlying issue today IMO, the media chasing a headline, rather than investigating a solution.

*August 2021, 12 months ago.*








						Morrison government hates low unemployment and wage growth
					

For the better part of six months, the Reserve Bank of Australia (RBA) has stated continuously that it is committed to driving unemployment below 4.5% because lower unemployment is needed to drive wage growth above its current historically low level. The RBA has also admitted that the closure of...




					www.macrobusiness.com.au
				



_Only in the world of the Morrison Government is an unemployment rate below 5%, a strong jobs market, and decent wage growth seen as a bad outcome.

The above statement from Julian Leeser proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Coalition serves its business masters first and foremost, and that they don’t give a stuff about the welfare of Australian workers and households.

The Coalition’s modus operandi is to flood the labour market with cheaper migrant workers to fatten the wallets of its business mates.
Unconventional Economist_

*August 2022, Today*
_








						Welcome to the Jobs & Skills Destruction Summit
					

In this week’s speech to the National Press Club, Prime Minister Anthony Albanese said that Australia needs to rapidly lift immigration because we are a “migrant country” and “we’ve got a globalised labour market, and we need to enhance our reputation”. Albanese also attacked the former Morrison...




					www.macrobusiness.com.au
				



In this week’s speech to the National Press Club, Prime Minister Anthony Albanese said that Australia needs to rapidly lift immigration because we are a “migrant country” and “we’ve got a globalised labour market, and we need to enhance our reputation”.

Albanese also attacked the former Morrison Government’s decision to send temporary migrants home during the pandemic, claiming it should instead have spent billions of taxpayers dollars providing JobKeeper, JobSeeker and Medicare so that they could stay:
Let’s be real: the Summit should be renamed the “Jobs & Skills Destruction Summit”, because that’s what it will achieve.

Labor’s ‘Big Australia’ immigration agenda will lift unemployment and further suppress wage growth, while exacerbating infrastructure and housing strains across Australia. It will drive another ‘lost decade’ for Australians (see here and here) where the economy and living standards stagnate in per capita terms, and productivity growth remains stillborn as migrants flood into low productivity ‘people servicing’ industries.
Unconventional Economist_

Like I've always said, only the faces change and it is why the swinging voter has the responsibility to keep Australia on track.
Satire at its best.
@basilio you may be able to post up the shovels take on it.
He is good at satire.
The funny part is, only the swinging voter will read both articles.


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## sptrawler (31 August 2022)

What I really find funny with the satire of the last post was:

_The Coalition’s modus operandi is to flood the labour market with cheaper migrant workers to fatten the wallets of its business mates._

As opposed to:
_Albanese also attacked the former Morrison Government’s decision to send temporary migrants home during the pandemic, claiming it should instead have spent billions of taxpayers dollars providing JobKeeper, JobSeeker and Medicare so that they could stay:_

But hey as long as it rows your boat, even if your moral compass is spinning like a top.🤣


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## noirua (3 September 2022)

Prime Minister Boris Johnson is on the move from his London address at number 10 Downing Street.


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## sptrawler (4 September 2022)

noirua said:


> View attachment 146345
> 
> Prime Minister Boris Johnson is on the move from his London address at number 10 Downing Street.



Check mate.


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## noirua (6 September 2022)

Boris Johnson likens himself to Roman who returned as dictator
					

Departing PM references Cincinnatus, who turned to farming after leaving Rome – but then returned to power




					www.theguardian.com
				




Boris likens himself to Emperor Lucius Cincinnatus. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucius_Quinctius_Cincinnatus


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## Knobby22 (7 September 2022)

noirua said:


> Boris Johnson likens himself to Roman who returned as dictator
> 
> 
> Departing PM references Cincinnatus, who turned to farming after leaving Rome – but then returned to power
> ...



I can see where Boris is coming from..he believes he shares the traits of humility, virtue and modesty. 😄


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## bux2000 (13 September 2022)

Is it just me or has @basilio  gone AWL.

bux


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## moXJO (13 September 2022)

bux2000 said:


> Is it just me or has @basilio  gone AWL.
> 
> bux



Probably a burst of YOLO after covid pandemic. Happening a lot.


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## sptrawler (14 September 2022)

moXJO said:


> Probably a burst of YOLO after covid pandemic. Happening a lot.



Yes, we are off on a cruise next month.  🥳


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## basilio (4 November 2022)

Couldn't resist this.

*Sport shouldn’t be used to push a message, says billionaire who uses sport to push a message             * 







A woman who uses the uniforms of rowers, volleyballers and swimmers to promote her mining company says sport should not be used to as some sort of personal promotional messaging tool.

Standing at a sporting venue in front of a large sign that displays the name of her company, the billionaire said sport and self-promotion do not mix.                                                                                

“The idea that you’d think it appropriate to use sport as a way to push your agenda is really disappointing. All this tedious virtue signalling is nothing more than an attempt to influence the public’s perception of you.

“How about we keep our opinions to ourselves and get back to what sport is all about – softening the image of iron-ore mining companies”.  








						Sport shouldn’t be used to push a message, says billionaire who uses sport to push a message
					

"This is nothing more than an attempt to influence the public's perception of you"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## sptrawler (5 November 2022)

basilio said:


> Couldn't resist this.
> 
> *Sport shouldn’t be used to push a message, says billionaire who uses sport to push a message             *
> 
> ...



Well it is certainly going to be interesting to see how the various sports manage, when they have to rely on their supporter base to find the administration costs, players wages and facilities overheads.
Good on them for standing up for a principle, maybe sports people should make a stand against the obscene profits banks make and stop paying their mortgages? Refuse sponsorship from any company that isn't seen as morally acceptable to all sectors of the population.
Where do principals start and finish, which principals are worthy and which aren't?


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## sptrawler (18 November 2022)

NSW premier devastated by having to take responsibility for flood response, why is it all of a sudden his fault? Where's Scomo, when you need someone to blame.  









						'It's a disgrace': Eugowra resident confronts Dominic Perrottet over flood response
					

Frustrations bubble over in the Central West, where a local man has demanded more support for flood-stricken communities from the NSW premier, as prepare-to-evacuate orders are issued for towns downstream of Forbes.




					www.abc.net.au
				



A Eugowra man has demanded more support for flood-stricken Central-West communities from the NSW premier, as additional funding is announced for farmers. 

While visiting the flood-ravaged town of Eugowra, the NSW Premier Dominic Perrottet was confronted by local Peter Jones. 

"People were just left to their own devices, we had no food, no clothing, no-one telling them what will happen next — no-one was here to help us," he told the Premier.


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## sptrawler (18 November 2022)

Looks like the French are hoping for another sub contract, they got  $1/2billion for making nothing last time, may as well have a go at doubling up. 😂









						Macron says submarine offer to Australia still ‘on the table’
					

A diplomatic feud erupted between the two nations after Canberra scrapped a multibillion-dollar contract for French submarines last year.




					www.politico.eu


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## wayneL (18 November 2022)

sptrawler said:


> Looks like the French are hoping for another sub contract, they got  $1/2billion for making nothing last time, may as well have a go at doubling up. 😂
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I reckon we should stick to buying Camembert and Bordeaux


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## sptrawler (25 November 2022)

I wonder how much this cost us. 
If no one knew of his appointment, how would he have been forwarded any information by the department.🤣
Sounds like a lot more paper for the round filing cabinet under the desk.🤪
Couldn't we have saved a lot of money, by someone saying "hey if you are going to be vice captain in a portfolio, you have to tell everyone".🥳








						Key takeaways from the inquiry into Scott Morrison's secret ministries
					

The findings from the investigation into Scott Morrison's self-appointment to secret ministries have been released. Here are some of the key takeaways.




					www.abc.net.au
				



Recommendation 1​Legislation should be enacted to require publication in the Commonwealth Gazette or in a notifiable instrument registered on the Federal Register of Legislation as soon as reasonably practicable following the fact of:


1.the swearing of an Executive Councillor under section 62 of the Constitution;
2.the appointment of an officer to administer a department of State under section 64 of the Constitution;
3.the direction to a Minister of State to hold an office under section 65 of the Constitution; and
4.the revocation of membership of the Federal Executive Council, an appointment to administer a department, and a direction to hold an office, when effected by an instrument executed by the Governor-General.
The notice or notifiable instrument should include the name of the person and the date that he or she was sworn, appointed and/or directed, or the date that such membership, appointment and/or direction was revoked. It may also be convenient for a copy of the instrument to be included in the notification.

Recommendation 2​The authorisation of an acting minister for a period of two weeks or more should be published as soon as reasonably practicable in the Commonwealth Gazette or in a notifiable instrument on the Federal Register of Legislation.

Recommendation 3​A list of all acting arrangements should be published periodically on the Department of the Prime Minister and Cabinet's or each department's website.

Recommendation 4​A document identifying:


1.the ministers appointed to administer each department of State;
2.the offices the ministers are directed to hold; and
3.in the case of two or more ministers administering the one department, an outline of the division of responsibilities between the ministers
should be published on the Department the of Prime Minister and Cabinet's website.

Recommendation 5​A website concerning ministerial appointments should be established which contains explanatory materials and current and past records to enable the public to readily ascertain which minister is responsible for which particular matters.

Recommendation 6​All departments should publish a list of the ministers appointed to administer them on their website, and include in their annual report the name of all ministers appointed to administer the department in the reporting period.


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## sptrawler (29 November 2022)

Australian politics is satire, it is a joke an absolute media circus.
Hang on lets have a royal comission into that. Lol absolute FW's running a political scam.


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## basilio (2 December 2022)

This crew always make some excellent points about Australien (sic) politics while wielding their smiley  , sweary,  stilettos.

Check out their latest  take on the Great Australian Housing Shortage.









						Honest Government Ads - The Juice Media
					

Authorised by the Department of Genuine Satire. Produced by the Patrons of The Juice Media. Are you a teacher or community-radio host looking for PG / bleeped versions? Go here! All202120202019201820172016 Honest Government Ad | News Corp Bargaining Code February 26, 2021February 27, 2021 The...




					www.thejuicemedia.com


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## basilio (2 December 2022)

The last government took a very dim view of Juice Medias "Honest Government ads" . They thought people might actually think they were Government ads.

So they passed some laws to criminalize such behaviour.

Naturally Juice media had field day with* that *decision









						Honest Government Ads - The Juice Media
					

Authorised by the Department of Genuine Satire. Produced by the Patrons of The Juice Media. Are you a teacher or community-radio host looking for PG / bleeped versions? Go here! All202120202019201820172016 Honest Government Ad | News Corp Bargaining Code February 26, 2021February 27, 2021 The...




					www.thejuicemedia.com


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## sptrawler (2 December 2022)

We have sent our manufacturing offshore, we have closed all the mines, we has stopped gas production, now to go and find lunch. 🤣


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## macca (2 December 2022)

sptrawler said:


> We have sent our manufacturing offshore, we have closed all the mines, we has stopped gas production, now to go and find lunch. 🤣
> 
> View attachment 149999




just jump online, too easy


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## sptrawler (2 December 2022)

Remember when we only visited Centrelink to update our details, then we went online and had the welfare card, now they feed us and it saves us a fortune on the cooking costs.
Also there is the safety side, most accidents happen in the kitchen and we also don't need a car to do our shopping, which helps us avoid road accident trauma and has the added benefit of more internet gamming time.
Just better Government, looking after the little guy.  🤣



Centrelink 2040, coming to a corner near you. 🥳


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## sptrawler (2 December 2022)

The Government is committed to reducing household power costs. 
For a small upfront cost and a reasonably cheap monthly charge, consumers will be able to take control over their power bills.
This could, if used correctly, reduce consumers power bills by up to $265 per year. 🤣


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## sptrawler (2 December 2022)

It sounds as though the Government is going to write off $31bn of taxpayer funded NBN debt, so that taxpayers can get cheaper internet, that they paid for.🤪
This means the taxpayer will probably no longer have to pay twice as much for internet access to the system they paid put in, to replace the previous system they paid put in and only paid $30 access for.🤣
The retail internet providers send their thanks for a job well done and look forward to putting more of the live and free content, onto the streaming platform. 









						NBN writes off recovering $31b invested to build network
					

The government-owned company said it would no longer seek to recover the full $44 billion sunk into the initial build and would only claw back $12.5 billion.




					www.afr.com
				




In a new draft pricing proposal lodged with the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission this week,* the government-owned company said it would no longer seek to recover the full $44 billion sunk into the initial build and instead would only claw back $12.5 billion from retail internet providers.*
NBN Co stressed the $31.5 billion contraction to its Initial Cost Recovery Amount (ICRA) would not itself lead to any writedown or impairment of its value, which would hurt the federal budget’s bottom line, saying it will allow instead the setting of “lower wholesale prices in future” than otherwise.



			https://minister.infrastructure.gov.au/rowland/media-release/albanese-government-welcomes-lodgement-new-nbn-sau-variation-accc
		


*Quotes attributable to the Minister for Communications, the Hon Michelle Rowland MP:*

_“At the core of the Albanese Government’s priorities are the long-term interests of Australian consumers. This means affordable prices and a quality, resilient network._


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## sptrawler (2 December 2022)

The Greens handing out justice. 🤣


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## sptrawler (2 December 2022)

The Liberals trying to offload ScoMo


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## basilio (11 December 2022)

ScoMos latest award.  The prestigious Time-Life  People of the Year award.

*Scott Morrison named Time magazine’s People of the Year                *






Time Magazine has awarded Scott Morrison it’s coveted ‘People of the Year’ award for their unique ability to take on a seemingly endless number of jobs while simultaneously not actually doing any work. 

Time editor-in-chief Edward Felsenthal said the decision was the most “clear-cut in memory”.                                                                                

“No one embodies the absolute shambolic  energy of 2022 more than Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison. Or Finance Minister Scott Morrison. Or Social Services Minister Scott Morrison. Or Home Affairs Minister ….” he said, before being reminded he only had 30 minutes to get through his speech. 

“Scott has given ordinary people hope that, even if they don’t have any talent, relevant experience, charisma or work ethic, they too can go on to hold the majority of the positions on the front bench of a democratic nation”.

Judges also signed out Morrison for their efforts in single-handedly reducing Australia’s unemployment rate. Thousands of new jobs were created under the Morrison Government, and Scott Morrison selflessly took most of them for themselves. 









						Scott Morrison named Time magazine’s People of the Year
					

News you can believe in




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## basilio (19 December 2022)

Yep.  Makes total sense. Very sharp.









						Jenny to blame for Robodebt, Morrison says
					

“It’s time to take responsibility. And Jenny is now willing to do that".




					www.theshovel.com.au
				




_Putting on his special emotional voice for the benefit of those watching, the former PM said the scheme had taken a huge toll on him. “Sure, there were people who were relentlessly harassed into handing over their final few dollars under the threat of legal action, driving them to the depths of depression. But think about how it felt for me. I had it much worse”.  _


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## basilio (6 January 2023)

Neat one here.  An advertising campaign  for lamb that  satirizes the  theme of  "Unaustralian"









						Latest lamb ad humorously roasts Aussies for 'un-Australian' behaviour
					

The latest annual lamb ad from Meat and Livestock Australia takes aim at "offences" such as eating a meat pie with a knife and fork, changing the channel during the Test cricket and not knowing the words to Khe Sanh.




					www.abc.net.au


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## orr (6 January 2023)

basilio said:


> Neat one here.  An advertising campaign  for lamb that  satirizes the  theme of  "Unaustralian"
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Goes to prove that there's more ways to kill a 'j_umbuck'_ than than f*kcing it to death, oh so terribly _un-australian_. ..._ bon appe'tit *!*_

I feel an award coming on......


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## basilio (7 January 2023)

basilio said:


> Neat one here.  An advertising campaign  for lamb that  satirizes the  theme of  "Unaustralian"
> 
> 
> 
> ...





There are a number of interesting elements to this story
1) The two main characters are attractive and articulate aboriginal women.  They have the best lines and are central characters in the story. They are not "sexed up" either

2) The remainder of the cast are traditional typical Aussies.  The stereotypes we see in movies ( They're a Weird Mob)  and some older Australian docos .  But they are a pretty homely bunch - being generous. There is no one with the looks or lines of the two aboriginal women.

3) The most vivid scene is the final aerial shot of the characters forming an Aboriginal whirl pattern as they celebrate their lamb barbie.

It's a 3 minute story. It will be interesting to see  the different editing forms for TV.


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## basilio (Friday at 4:30 PM)

Says it all.  Dutton is a smarmy cow.

*Dutton says he needs more detail on the specifics of the Voice before he can walk out on it in Parliament * 






Opposition Leader Peter Dutton says he wants a line-by-line description of what the Indigenous Voice to Parliament would entail before he boycotts it later this year.

In a letter addressed to Anthony Albanese but strangely sent to News Corp, Dutton said there was a lot more mileage he needed to extract from the issue before he officially rejects it.                                                                                                              

“When this is eventually tabled in Parliament, I will stand up, turn my back and walk out on it, in a symbolic ‘xuck you’ to Indigenous Australians. That’s my track record with these types of things. But that’s still a way off, and there’s still a fair bit more media coverage I can get out of this before then,” Dutton explained.

“So until such time that I have the opportunity to walk out in Parliament, until that point, I will make performative demands that the Prime Minister provide more detail than the 264-page report already provided by the joint select committee. I think that’s what all reasonable Australians expect of me as Opposition Leader”.









						Dutton says he needs more detail on the specifics of the Voice before he can walk out on it in Parliament
					

"There's a lot more mileage I need to extract from the issue before I officially reject it"




					www.theshovel.com.au


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## sptrawler (Yesterday at 2:11 AM)

You're starting to become a bit of a cult disciple, of the shovel @basilio , it's starting to become a bit creepy OCD. Lol

"All hail the shovel"  🤣


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