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The completely useless irrelevant thread

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Of course after having a closer look with magnifying glass in hand, I realised it was written in the ancient Greek Language.
 
The Quotes of Steven Wright:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ..... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever ... So far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
 
IFocus said:
The Quotes of Steven Wright:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ..... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever ... So far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
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@IFocus I burst out laughing when I read this, so I read it again.
Had the same response
 
I purchased a phone for my personal and business use and for no other reason. Yet, these supposed charity callers are of the opinion I did it only so they can call me.

I'm probably not the only one who is tired of these intrusive fwits.
 
Bellcose said:
I purchased a phone for my personal and business use and for no other reason. Yet, these supposed charity callers are of the opinion I did it only so they can call me.

I'm probably not the only one who is tired of these intrusive fwits.
Click to expand...
The do not call register is supposed to allow you to not be called by randoms, but for reasons only a politician could provide, neither political orgs and charities have to abide by the register.
Mick
 
mullokintyre said:
The do not call register is supposed to allow you to not be called by randoms, but for reasons only a politician could provide, neither political orgs and charities have to abide by the register.
Mick
Click to expand...

Yep. Almost funny in that the more either group contacts without my asking, the less inclined I am to either donate to or vote for the ricks even if I may agree with their objectives.
 
Any organisation cold calling, or hassling us at shopping centres, you can be sure that only a small percentage of the money goes to the actual target.
 
Bellcose said:
Yep. Almost funny in that the more either group contacts without my asking, the less inclined I am to either donate to or vote for the ricks even if I may agree with their objectives.
Click to expand...
We are the same, we have a policy that any business that ignores our "no junk mail" sign is wiped
 
macca said:
We are the same, we have a policy that any business that ignores our "no junk mail" sign is wiped
Click to expand...
my phone has an Ignore button .... basically, if you're not on the call register, I offer Voicemail and then I'll get back to you.

A sorry turn of events, but that's how it is.

Must be hard for a legitimate business.
 
Bellcose said:
I purchased a phone for my personal and business use and for no other reason. Yet, these supposed charity callers are of the opinion I did it only so they can call me.

I'm probably not the only one who is tired of these intrusive fwits.
Click to expand...
When they and the "overseas" callers pester me I press the "I will call you back".
Seems to works for a little while/. Then I hit block, scam and delete.
 
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