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Political Satire

It sounds as though the Government is going to write off $31bn of taxpayer funded NBN debt, so that taxpayers can get cheaper internet, that they paid for.?
This means the taxpayer will probably no longer have to pay twice as much for internet access to the system they paid put in, to replace the previous system they paid put in and only paid $30 access for.?
The retail internet providers send their thanks for a job well done and look forward to putting more of the live and free content, onto the streaming platform. :roflmao:


In a new draft pricing proposal lodged with the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission this week, the government-owned company said it would no longer seek to recover the full $44 billion sunk into the initial build and instead would only claw back $12.5 billion from retail internet providers.
NBN Co stressed the $31.5 billion contraction to its Initial Cost Recovery Amount (ICRA) would not itself lead to any writedown or impairment of its value, which would hurt the federal budget’s bottom line, saying it will allow instead the setting of “lower wholesale prices in future” than otherwise.


Quotes attributable to the Minister for Communications, the Hon Michelle Rowland MP:

“At the core of the Albanese Government’s priorities are the long-term interests of Australian consumers. This means affordable prices and a quality, resilient network.
 
ScoMos latest award. The prestigious Time-Life People of the Year award.

Scott Morrison named Time magazine’s People of the Year

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Time Magazine has awarded Scott Morrison it’s coveted ‘People of the Year’ award for their unique ability to take on a seemingly endless number of jobs while simultaneously not actually doing any work.

Time editor-in-chief Edward Felsenthal said the decision was the most “clear-cut in memory”.

“No one embodies the absolute shambolic energy of 2022 more than Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison. Or Finance Minister Scott Morrison. Or Social Services Minister Scott Morrison. Or Home Affairs Minister ….” he said, before being reminded he only had 30 minutes to get through his speech.

“Scott has given ordinary people hope that, even if they don’t have any talent, relevant experience, charisma or work ethic, they too can go on to hold the majority of the positions on the front bench of a democratic nation”.

Judges also signed out Morrison for their efforts in single-handedly reducing Australia’s unemployment rate. Thousands of new jobs were created under the Morrison Government, and Scott Morrison selflessly took most of them for themselves.

 
Yep. Makes total sense. Very sharp.


Putting on his special emotional voice for the benefit of those watching, the former PM said the scheme had taken a huge toll on him. “Sure, there were people who were relentlessly harassed into handing over their final few dollars under the threat of legal action, driving them to the depths of depression. But think about how it felt for me. I had it much worse”.
 
Neat one here. An advertising campaign for lamb that satirizes the theme of "Unaustralian"


 
Neat one here. An advertising campaign for lamb that satirizes the theme of "Unaustralian"



Goes to prove that there's more ways to kill a 'jumbuck' than than f*kcing it to death, oh so terribly un-australian. ... bon appe'tit !

I feel an award coming on......
 
Neat one here. An advertising campaign for lamb that satirizes the theme of "Unaustralian"




There are a number of interesting elements to this story
1) The two main characters are attractive and articulate aboriginal women. They have the best lines and are central characters in the story. They are not "sexed up" either

2) The remainder of the cast are traditional typical Aussies. The stereotypes we see in movies ( They're a Weird Mob) and some older Australian docos . But they are a pretty homely bunch - being generous. There is no one with the looks or lines of the two aboriginal women.

3) The most vivid scene is the final aerial shot of the characters forming an Aboriginal whirl pattern as they celebrate their lamb barbie.

It's a 3 minute story. It will be interesting to see the different editing forms for TV.
 
Says it all. Dutton is a smarmy cow.

Dutton says he needs more detail on the specifics of the Voice before he can walk out on it in Parliament


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Opposition Leader Peter Dutton says he wants a line-by-line description of what the Indigenous Voice to Parliament would entail before he boycotts it later this year.

In a letter addressed to Anthony Albanese but strangely sent to News Corp, Dutton said there was a lot more mileage he needed to extract from the issue before he officially rejects it.

“When this is eventually tabled in Parliament, I will stand up, turn my back and walk out on it, in a symbolic ‘xuck you’ to Indigenous Australians. That’s my track record with these types of things. But that’s still a way off, and there’s still a fair bit more media coverage I can get out of this before then,” Dutton explained.

“So until such time that I have the opportunity to walk out in Parliament, until that point, I will make performative demands that the Prime Minister provide more detail than the 264-page report already provided by the joint select committee. I think that’s what all reasonable Australians expect of me as Opposition Leader”.

 
You're starting to become a bit of a cult disciple, of the shovel @basilio , it's starting to become a bit creepy OCD. Lol

"All hail the shovel" ?
 
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You're starting to become a bit of a cult disciple, of the shovel @basilio , it's starting to become a bit creepy OCD. Lol

"All hail the shovel" ?


Do you think the satire hits the mark ? Is it very pointed and still darkly humourous ? Would it be "better" if I left off the the recognition or made it up for another site ?

The Shovel just happens to have some very funny satire that I share. There were more I could have quoted but ... enoughs enough :)
 
Do you think the satire hits the mark ? Is it very pointed and still darkly humourous ? Would it be "better" if I left off the the recognition or made it up for another site ?

The Shovel just happens to have some very funny satire that I share. There were more I could have quoted but ... enoughs enough :)
I don't mind him at all, the problem I find is that it is a bit one dimensional, I would like to see him apply his wit to all sides then it would be a bit less predictable. Even better still, something original from yourself, that portrays your thoughts.
Or maybe have a dedicated shovel thread. :2twocents
 
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I don't mind him at all, the problem I find is that it is a bit one dimensional, I would like to see him apply his wit to all sides then it would be a bit less predictable. Even better still, something original from yourself, that portrays your thoughts.
Or maybe have a dedicated shovel thread. :2twocents

A heads up on your comments. I believe many of the ideas come from people outsiders. There isn't just someone sitting in a room making these up.
There are a range of "stories" and that includes digs at non conservative politicians. I think I have posted a few of those . For balance.:)

There are also quips across social issues. Megan Harry The King/Queen.

I guess you have gone the website to check out the stories ?
 
Just in time to put to the sword all the politically incorrect components of our society.
Mind you I am surprised Roald Dahal hasn't been pt on the Do not Read list. He owned some very poor behaviour as a human being.

What was changed and why ? Check out the other Url

Fair-Trade, OHS-Compliant Healthy-Snack Factory”


Updated Roald Dahl classic now called “Charlie and the Fair-Trade, OHS-Compliant Healthy-Snack Factory”

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The famous Roald Dahl children’s book will now be about an equal-opportunity employer that pays above market rates for its cocoa and is an industry leader in Worksafe practices, publisher Puffin has confirmed. The change comes as part of a review of Dahl’s books by ‘sensitivity readers’ to edit out any potentially offensive words.

In the new edition, which Puffin says contains only minor tweaks, Willy Wonka holds a competition to win a golden ticket to tour his factory, with enough golden tickets available for any child who wants one.

As part of the tour, children sit through a two-hour seminar on how to correctly lift heavy boxes, attend a union meeting, and learn about healthy, sugar-free alternatives to chocolate snacks. “Every child gets a free piece of fruit before they leave!” Willy Wonka sings, in an edited version of the Candy Man song.

Puffin confirmed there were a small number of other changes that readers will hardly notice. The tour of the ‘nut room’ in the original has been deemed offensive to those with nut-based allergies and has been replaced with a presentation on the techniques the factory is using to reduce its carbon footprint. The chapter where Augustus Gloop gets sucked into a massive glass pipe has been changed to a diversity and inclusion morning tea.

Given its potential to promote unhealthy habits, the word ‘chocolate’ has been removed throughout.
 
What goes around comes around. Do you believe it ??

New Zealand begins yacht turn-backs as more ‘super tax refugees’ arrive from Australia
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New Zealand Prime Minister Chris Hipkins has strengthened his country’s border policies after a huge influx of boat people began arriving from Australia this week.

Dozens of luxury yachts have been entering New Zealand waters each day this week, as desperate millionaires try to flee a brutal Australian regime that has threatened to inflict a slight tweak to their superannuation concessions.

One asylum seeker, named Henry, said he had left everything behind as he rushed to escape persecution. “I’ve got literally nothing – apart from this yacht, the chopper on the back and the Bentley that I managed to fit on the lower deck. Everything else I had to leave back in Australia until such time that I can get it shipped over,” he said.

Another would-be refugee said he didn’t even have a passport. “My personal assistant has that, obviously. I don’t deal with administrative paperwork”.

Prime Minister Hipkins said he would begin implementing yacht turn-backs to dissuade other millionaires from making the treacherous journey across the Tasman. “If you come here by boat you won’t be settled in New Zealand,” he said.

 
Outstanding opportunity for John "Pork Barrel" Barilaro to highlight exactly why he is most suited to this gilt edged job he created.

Inquiry into Barilaro’s New York posting to be conducted by John Barilaro


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NSW Premier Dominic Perrottet has confirmed that, after an extensive global search, the person to lead an inquiry into why former deputy premier John Barilaro was chosen for a $500,000-a-year job created by former deputy premier John Barilaro, will be former deputy premier John Barilaro.

The role was initially awarded to an impeccably qualified woman within the public service, but the offer was later withdrawn after John Barilaro said he wanted the position.

In a media conference this morning, Perrottet said it was important that the person leading the investigation had an intimate understanding of the issues. “John both established the New York role, and was successful in securing that role, so I don’t think there’s anyone more qualified to investigate this, frankly”.

Opposition MPs have strongly condemned the inquiry appointment, saying there is a clear conflict of interest. Perrottet says he will take their comments on board and has asked John Barilaro to prepare a report on any potential conflicts.


I wonder if it will be yet another defamation case against a journalist. ?

An investigation into the controversial appointment of John Barilaro to a lucrative overseas trade posting has found no evidence of corrupt conduct by him or former NSW minister Stuart Ayres.
 
I wonder if it will be yet another defamation case against a journalist. ?

An investigation into the controversial appointment of John Barilaro to a lucrative overseas trade posting has found no evidence of corrupt conduct by him or former NSW minister Stuart Ayres.
Probably. We have the toughest laws in the free world.

Obviously this would pass the pub test,
1. Create a well paying job in New York for the state government. (Why?)
2. Put it out to tender to seek the best person. Someone gets chosen.
3. Retire.
4. Chosen person told they are not required and you get the job.

5. Make sure that you are not seen influencing anyone to give you the job. Voila. You are not corrupt!
6. Sue reporters at the SMH for reporting this and insinuating there may have been some corruption. Collect $1mill dollars.
Do not pass go. (Monopoly Game). Good Chance card.
 
Asylum seekers to travel to Australia by tall ship, in hope of being able to stay for next 250 yearS

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A group of asylum seekers from Iraq say they’ve heard that if you arrive in Australian waters in a fleet of eighteenth-century tall ships, you’ll be automatically granted permission to stay for as long as you like.

“You don’t need a visa. Just a tall ship and a sense of self-entitlement,” one man in the group explained.
“Usually if you come to Australia by boat you get turned around or sent to Nauru, but this is a historical loophole apparently. We’ve heard you even get free land!”

He said there was no requirement to provide any notice, or understand the local language or customs. “There’s no test or form to fill out. You just turn up, unpack your stuff and take over the country. It sounds too good to be true to be honest!”
 
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