How old is too old to be living at home?

[prawn_86]

Agree on both parts I was out the door at 16 and enjoying it, now the dreaded 40 draws near but at least I had a hell of a time getting there. Its easy to live safe and lose years if you stay at your parents.

Yep.

Since I was 17 I have lived in 5 different cities/towns and am about to move internationally. In each of those cities I know people still living with their parents that say they wish they could move around like me, but are too lazy/scared to take a leap out of their comfort zone and leave home.

 

[Sdajii]

I don't think there's a cookie cutter answer to this question. In some cultures it's normal for families to live together, with multiple generations and extended families. In western culture it's usually seen as a case of moving out being a part of becoming an independent adult. Some leave in their mid or even early teens, others never leave. Sometimes those extremes and anything in between can be healthy, sometimes anything on that spectrum can be unhealthy.

If you have bad parents (as I did) it's probably better to get out ASAP, but sometimes for various reasons that can be difficult. My family home, if you can call it that, stopped existing when I was 20 and for a couple of months I lived in a car before finding work and somewhere to live. A couple of years later I moved in with my mother so I could afford to go through uni, but that was basically a case of living in a share house with someone I had little emotional attachment to, didn't ever share food/time with, etc., and I was just there for the cheap rent. After finishing uni I moved interstate, hated it and moved back to my home state.

I've seen people in their teens who really badly need to move out of home. I've seen people living with their parents as well as their spouses and it has been perfectly happy and healthy. I've seen people in their 40s and 50s living with their parents and it has been utterly tragic, especially when they're single and clearly emotionally dependent on their parent(s) and unable to form healthy relationships away from their parents.

The bottom line is that if you're happy and able to make good friendships and relationships outside your family, and are living with your parents by mutual choice or at least in mutual happiness rather than emotional necessity on one or both sides, there's no problem regardless of age. If it's financial necessity it's obviously not ideal, but if it's emotionally healthy there's no big problem.

Western culture has a strange stigma about living with parents. In many cultures it's thought of as bad for children to move out of the family home until they're married, or even after they're married. If I had decent parents (which I don't) I would be happy to live with them (or I suppose it would end up being more them living with me) as long as there was space for them to do their thing and my partner and our kids (if/when we have them) to have our own space, as is normal in many traditional cultures. Being white Australians I expect my kids will want to leave when they're somewhere in their early 20s or so, but as long as they were emotionally and functionally independent and healthy and financially comfortable I would be happy for them to live with me as long as they wanted. Realistically I think that's extremely unlikely to happen, and I'm perfectly happy with that. If they were too emotionally dependent (to the point of it preventing them forming normal relationships with other people) or trying to stay at home as a means of avoiding financial accomplishment, for their own good I would kick them out as young as was legal.

 

[nioka]

Well statistically 35 is 'middle aged' and it's all down hill from there...

Rubbish. I never found the "downhill" part until I reached 75. Been on the slippery side since then but still enjoying the ride, most times.

A man is not old when his hair turns grey
a man is not old when his teeth decay
but a man is heading for his last long sleep
when his mind makes a promise
that his body cant keep.

 

[prawn_86]

Rubbish. I never found the "downhill" part until I reached 75. Been on the slippery side since then but still enjoying the ride, most times.

Well the downhill quote is probably a bit too casual. But you cannot deny that statistically, every day after 35 you progress further past the halfway point of your life, meaning that you have less time to live than you have already lived. I class that as downhill, I'm not commenting on the quality of life, just the stats

 

[Calliope]

Well the downhill quote is probably a bit too casual. But you cannot deny that statistically, every day after 35 you progress further past the halfway point of your life, meaning that you have less time to live than you have already lived. I class that as downhill, I'm not commenting on the quality of life, just the stats

You would have to go back a long way to find "stats" that supported that.

Based on the latest mortality rates, a boy born in 2006 would be expected to live to 78.7 years on average, while a girl would be expected to live to 83.5 years. However, a man and woman aged 25 in 2006 would be expected to live to ages 79.7 and 84.2 years respectively. This shows that once people survive through childhood, the chance of dying as a young adult is very low and hence life expectancy increases.

http://www.aihw.gov.au/life-expectancy/

 

[nioka]

Well the downhill quote is probably a bit too casual. But you cannot deny that statistically, every day after 35 you progress further past the halfway point of your life, meaning that you have less time to live than you have already lived. I class that as downhill, I'm not commenting on the quality of life, just the stats

Still wrong. I'm over 80 so halfway was over 40 not 35.

 

[McLovin]

Well the downhill quote is probably a bit too casual. But you cannot deny that statistically, every day after 35 you progress further past the halfway point of your life, meaning that you have less time to live than you have already lived. I class that as downhill, I'm not commenting on the quality of life, just the stats

Statisically you don't. Life expectancy for Australia is over 80.

As you get older your life expectancy also increases with every year that you don't die. If you're male and live through your teens and early 20s you're probably going to live a life above the average. A male at 21/22 is about 3x more likely to die than a female of the same age. In your first year of life you have the same chance of dying as a 50+ year old.

35 is definately not half your life.

 

[prawn_86]

Well i stand corrected, for some reason i thought it was 72, not 82.

My bad

 

[DB008]

I moved back home recently. Loving it. I have lived on my own, and will again soon. Nothing wrong with it.

 

[drsmith]

A high house price to income ratio makes this more of a necessity than it was in the past.

That being said, Income earners living in the household should contribute in some to the running of the household in my view.

 

[burglar]

Statisically ...

Statisically, 10 out of 10 people will die!