Special Envoy to Combat anti-Australianism. Mr.G.Gumnut

Garpal Gumnut said:

Subsequent to Jillian Segal's appointment to the new position of Special Envoy against Antisemistism an announcement has been made that another appointment will be made to combat Islamophobia.

I would like to quietly announce to my fellow members on ASF that a third position will be announced just prior to the next Federal Election ... A Special Envoy to combat Anti-Australianism. I have been approached and will accept the position.

While the two Ethnic appointments will not in any way increase community tensions, will not lead to a lessening of attacks on Jews nor Muslims and will not lead to a safer life for the cousins of both faiths in the Middle East, my appointment will make Australia a safer place for all Australians.

My lawyers and accountants, bookies and brokers are feverishly working on the fine print of my contract and my only non negotiable point is that my appointment be for life. There also may be the small need for a referendum to change the constitution so that my position remains separate from the High Court and the Parliament while exceeding theirs should my wise judgements clash with their silly ideas.

I am humbled.

gg

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Dona Ferentes said:

There are more than 2 faiths in the Middle East

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sptrawler said:

Wow I thought there was only two, unlike Australia that has several, Capitalism, Pozism, Screwism, Politicism, Gloatism, Smugism and of course Benevolence.

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Dona Ferentes said:

you forgot Mandurahboganism

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Garpal Gumnut said:

Subsequent to Jillian Segal's appointment to the new position of Special Envoy against Antisemistism an announcement has been made that another appointment will be made to combat Islamophobia.

I would like to quietly announce to my fellow members on ASF that a third position will be announced just prior to the next Federal Election ... A Special Envoy to combat Anti-Australianism. I have been approached and will accept the position.

While the two Ethnic appointments will not in any way increase community tensions, will not lead to a lessening of attacks on Jews nor Muslims and will not lead to a safer life for the cousins of both faiths in the Middle East, my appointment will make Australia a safer place for all Australians.

My lawyers and accountants, bookies and brokers are feverishly working on the fine print of my contract and my only non negotiable point is that my appointment be for life. There also may be the small need for a referendum to change the constitution so that my position remains separate from the High Court and the Parliament while exceeding theirs should my wise judgements clash with their silly ideas.

I am humbled.

gg

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sptrawler said:

Wow I thought there was only two, unlike Australia that has several, Capitalism, Pozism, Screwism, Politicism, Gloatism, Smugism and of course Benevolence.

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Garpal Gumnut said:

My first report to Government will include the threat to the Australian way of life on the ABC News app.
There are so many wokey wake warnings and emergency numbers to call that it leaves no space for the news.

gg

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Dona Ferentes said:

I'm feeling troubled just reading that, gg

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Garpal Gumnut said:

Subsequent to Jillian Segal's appointment to the new position of Special Envoy against Antisemistism an announcement has been made that another appointment will be made to combat Islamophobia.

I would like to quietly announce to my fellow members on ASF that a third position will be announced just prior to the next Federal Election ... A Special Envoy to combat Anti-Australianism. I have been approached and will accept the position.

While the two Ethnic appointments will not in any way increase community tensions, will not lead to a lessening of attacks on Jews nor Muslims and will not lead to a safer life for the cousins of both faiths in the Middle East, my appointment will make Australia a safer place for all Australians.

My lawyers and accountants, bookies and brokers are feverishly working on the fine print of my contract and my only non negotiable point is that my appointment be for life. There also may be the small need for a referendum to change the constitution so that my position remains separate from the High Court and the Parliament while exceeding theirs should my wise judgements clash with their silly ideas.

I am humbled.

gg

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Garpal Gumnut said:

Indeed @wayneL the concept of Australianism, and what it means to be Australian needs some firm definitions and limitations. One of my first acts when I assume the role will be to do just that.

There are some organisations presently receiving funding from the Government which appear to have a stranglehold on this aspect of our culture. The ABC is chief amongst them.

I believe that it is difficult to make something that is basically simple very complicated. The ABC however has managed to do this exquisitely well. For reference I would refer you to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_the_Australian_Broadcasting_Corporation

I will abolish the ABC. There will be no payouts nor golden handshakes but as many suitable people as possible will be re-employed under a new structure The “ Australian Broadcasting Company ”.

gg

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farmerge said:

@Garpal Gumnut I would be so bold as to suggest that a suitable number will be difficult to achieve !!!

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wayneL said:

Actually what I think we do need is a special envoy to search out and find the last vestiges of Australianism, before it becomes extinct.

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Dona Ferentes said:

too right, cobber.

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