Special Envoy to Combat anti-Australianism. Mr.G.Gumnut

[Garpal Gumnut]

Subsequent to Jillian Segal's appointment to the new position of Special Envoy against Antisemistism an announcement has been made that another appointment will be made to combat Islamophobia.

I would like to quietly announce to my fellow members on ASF that a third position will be announced just prior to the next Federal Election ... A Special Envoy to combat Anti-Australianism. I have been approached and will accept the position.

While the two Ethnic appointments will not in any way increase community tensions, will not lead to a lessening of attacks on Jews nor Muslims and will not lead to a safer life for the cousins of both faiths in the Middle East, my appointment will make Australia a safer place for all Australians.

My lawyers and accountants, bookies and brokers are feverishly working on the fine print of my contract and my only non negotiable point is that my appointment be for life. There also may be the small need for a referendum to change the constitution so that my position remains separate from the High Court and the Parliament while exceeding theirs should my wise judgements clash with their silly ideas.

I am humbled.

gg

 

[Dona Ferentes]

Subsequent to Jillian Segal's appointment to the new position of Special Envoy against Antisemistism an announcement has been made that another appointment will be made to combat Islamophobia.

I would like to quietly announce to my fellow members on ASF that a third position will be announced just prior to the next Federal Election ... A Special Envoy to combat Anti-Australianism. I have been approached and will accept the position.

While the two Ethnic appointments will not in any way increase community tensions, will not lead to a lessening of attacks on Jews nor Muslims and will not lead to a safer life for the cousins of both faiths in the Middle East, my appointment will make Australia a safer place for all Australians.

My lawyers and accountants, bookies and brokers are feverishly working on the fine print of my contract and my only non negotiable point is that my appointment be for life. There also may be the small need for a referendum to change the constitution so that my position remains separate from the High Court and the Parliament while exceeding theirs should my wise judgements clash with their silly ideas.

I am humbled.

gg

There are more than 2 faiths in the Middle East

 

[sptrawler]

I suggest existing Europeans secede from Australia and allow France to take control over the Parliamentary duties forthwith, so that Australia can be brought in line with other South Pacific Islands.
It would have a two fold effect, it would make the Australian citizens appreciate what they have and also stop the mass migration of New Zealanders coming here, we don't need more rugby players, AFL is our sport.

 

[sptrawler]

There are more than 2 faiths in the Middle East

Wow I thought there was only two, unlike Australia that has several, Capitalism, Pozism, Screwism, Politicism, Gloatism, Smugism and of course Benevolence.

 

[Dona Ferentes]

Wow I thought there was only two, unlike Australia that has several, Capitalism, Pozism, Screwism, Politicism, Gloatism, Smugism and of course Benevolence.

you forgot Mandurahboganism

 

[sptrawler]

you forgot Mandurahboganism

Yes of course, that is actually a bit of a cult at this point, but I think it is giving those disciples a head start in the new World that awaits. Glory be to those who suffer, the new start for those who are on the street, things can only get better.
Hopefully.

 

[farmerge]

Subsequent to Jillian Segal's appointment to the new position of Special Envoy against Antisemistism an announcement has been made that another appointment will be made to combat Islamophobia.

I would like to quietly announce to my fellow members on ASF that a third position will be announced just prior to the next Federal Election ... A Special Envoy to combat Anti-Australianism. I have been approached and will accept the position.

While the two Ethnic appointments will not in any way increase community tensions, will not lead to a lessening of attacks on Jews nor Muslims and will not lead to a safer life for the cousins of both faiths in the Middle East, my appointment will make Australia a safer place for all Australians.

My lawyers and accountants, bookies and brokers are feverishly working on the fine print of my contract and my only non negotiable point is that my appointment be for life. There also may be the small need for a referendum to change the constitution so that my position remains separate from the High Court and the Parliament while exceeding theirs should my wise judgements clash with their silly ideas.

I am humbled.

gg

@Garpal Gumnut And gg I would surmise that your constant place of any decision making would be the front bar of your said watering hole.
Salute and may gg rule supremely in this valiant position!!!!

 

[farmerge]

Wow I thought there was only two, unlike Australia that has several, Capitalism, Pozism, Screwism, Politicism, Gloatism, Smugism and of course Benevolence.

@sptrawler well just to mention a few!!!!

 

[Garpal Gumnut]

My first report to Government will include the threat to the Australian way of life on the ABC News app.

There are so many wakey woke warnings and emergency numbers to call that it leaves no space for the news.

gg

 

[farmerge]

@Garpal Gumnut gg I am sure that you being you will be able to surpass any and all impractabilities, whilst enjoying a cooling draft of ale.

 

[Dona Ferentes]

My first report to Government will include the threat to the Australian way of life on the ABC News app.
There are so many wokey wake warnings and emergency numbers to call that it leaves no space for the news.

gg

I'm feeling troubled just reading that, gg

 

[Garpal Gumnut]

I'm feeling troubled just reading that, gg

Unfortunately the evidence base for the effectiveness in news articles of these warnings and phone contact numbers in preventing suicide is scant. The more they are used the less is their effectiveness if there ever was any.

Resilience and education yes. Blanket warnings to fill out KPI's for the board meeting no.

gg

 

[Sean K]

Subsequent to Jillian Segal's appointment to the new position of Special Envoy against Antisemistism an announcement has been made that another appointment will be made to combat Islamophobia.

I would like to quietly announce to my fellow members on ASF that a third position will be announced just prior to the next Federal Election ... A Special Envoy to combat Anti-Australianism. I have been approached and will accept the position.

While the two Ethnic appointments will not in any way increase community tensions, will not lead to a lessening of attacks on Jews nor Muslims and will not lead to a safer life for the cousins of both faiths in the Middle East, my appointment will make Australia a safer place for all Australians.

My lawyers and accountants, bookies and brokers are feverishly working on the fine print of my contract and my only non negotiable point is that my appointment be for life. There also may be the small need for a referendum to change the constitution so that my position remains separate from the High Court and the Parliament while exceeding theirs should my wise judgements clash with their silly ideas.

I am humbled.

gg

If you need a CoS let me know.

 

[wayneL]

Actually what I think we do need is a special envoy to search out and find the last vestiges of Australianism, before it becomes extinct.

 

[Garpal Gumnut]

Indeed @wayneL the concept of Australianism, and what it means to be Australian needs some firm definitions and limitations. One of my first acts when I assume the role will be to do just that.

There are some organisations presently receiving funding from the Government which appear to have a stranglehold on this aspect of our culture. The ABC is chief amongst them.

I believe that it is difficult to make something that is basically simple very complicated. The ABC however has managed to do this exquisitely well. For reference I would refer you to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_the_Australian_Broadcasting_Corporation

I will abolish the ABC. There will be no payouts nor golden handshakes but as many suitable people as possible will be re-employed under a new structure The “ Australian Broadcasting Company ”.

gg

 

[farmerge]

Indeed @wayneL the concept of Australianism, and what it means to be Australian needs some firm definitions and limitations. One of my first acts when I assume the role will be to do just that.

There are some organisations presently receiving funding from the Government which appear to have a stranglehold on this aspect of our culture. The ABC is chief amongst them.

I believe that it is difficult to make something that is basically simple very complicated. The ABC however has managed to do this exquisitely well. For reference I would refer you to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_the_Australian_Broadcasting_Corporation

I will abolish the ABC. There will be no payouts nor golden handshakes but as many suitable people as possible will be re-employed under a new structure The “ Australian Broadcasting Company ”.

gg

@Garpal Gumnut I would be so bold as to suggest that a suitable number will be difficult to achieve !!!

 

[qldfrog]

@Garpal Gumnut I would be so bold as to suggest that a suitable number will be difficult to achieve !!!

And the latest..can we jailed onr of this council pen pusher for manslaughter should anyone be hurt?

 

[Dona Ferentes]

Actually what I think we do need is a special envoy to search out and find the last vestiges of Australianism, before it becomes extinct.

too right, cobber.

 

[farmerge]

too right, cobber.

Sadly we "normals" have been left far behind in the dust of these "others".

 

[Garpal Gumnut]

Fear not.

I am preparing a list of new names for those hamlets, districts and creeks that were changed by the ABC and certain Committees, politicians and aristocrats of differing and no hues, over the last five years or so.

I recently had a distressing experience at Townsville airport. I was travelling on OPM to a meeting on Gadigal Land and as it was a last minute invitation I decided to get a ticket at the airport on my way to the Qantas Lounge.

I left well ahead of time so's I could avail of the lounge as in the air now you get nothing. Worse still I couldn't get in to the lounge without a ticket. Nobody knew where Gadigal Land was. Gladstone? someone said. Goulbourn? suggested another. I showed them my invitation and one thing led to another. I must admit that I raised my voice GADIGA bloody AL etc. and when I explained to the nice policeman who was eventually called, he said, that's Sydney mate.

Well I never. I thought it looked like Sydney on another trip I took to Gadigal Land. Same bridge and Opera House 'n demonstrators waving AFL flags 'n all.

My first task when the first payment as Special Envoy hits my bank account will be to change all the names back. I have a mate who lives down Fraser Island way who has dropped off the contactable list who can help me. He may as well be in the Kalahari or K'gari as my mob used call it in Roamin times for all the letters he replies to.

gg