Christmas is so Screwed up in Australia

[roland]

2 months before Xmas and we have shops all decked out with Christmas decorations, trees with fake snow and the like.

Old men roam the shopping centres and department stores dressed in silly red outfits with pillows stuffed up their shirts sweating into their fake beards.

The Christmas greeting cards we get in the mail have scenes of snow and ice that most in Australia have never seen.

On what is often amongst the hottest days of the year our mothers are cooking up roast chickens, roast pork with crackling hot veggies all on a day probably better suited to a cold seafood platter.

We pop open our supermarket bought Bon Bons with stupid plastic toys made in China encased inside and wear the silly little paper crowns that quickly make our heads sweat. We read out decades old jokes and riddles that everyone, at least at some time in the past, remembered the answers.

Desert is often an English style hot pudding with custard that not many of us don't particularly like.

We sit around the Christmas tree that used to be a branch from a purpose grown pine tree with flashing lights and silly baubles dangling from strings attached to the branches.

We pass out gifts and watch as 6 hours of delicate carefully wrapped products from Asia end up being unwrapped in a fraction of the time. The resultant mess of paper and packaging rivals the height of the Christmas tree.

We gather our little piles of booty close by as we partake of a little too much Christmas cheer that started way earlier than it should have and finally relax.




Wouldn't miss it for the world.

Hope everyone has a Christmas to remember.

 

[Sean K]

Wouldn't miss it for the world.

Hope everyone has a Christmas to remember.

LOL

My Christmas revolves around beer and two-up with my extended family. Boxing Day Test with old mates. And ... hangovers.

 

[son of baglimit]

Desert is often an English style hot pudding with custard that not many of us don't particularly like.

i was the same til i tasted my mrs xmas pudding for the 1st time.

i can give you the recipe, but its pointless - you need to soak the fruit for a month......................in braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaandeeeeeeeeeeeee. and lots of it.

 

[Julia]

Or a contrarian view: Christmas is when people spend money they don't have to buy presents for people they don't like, who in turn will hate the presents.
Then come January they will sweat blood over how they are going to pay the credit card bill.

In between there's Christmas Day when families who don't much like one another get together anyway, drink too much, and when Uncle Sol makes a pass at a two generations younger distant relative, all hell breaks loose.

It's a time when emotions of every kind are heightened. The sad and lonely are more miserable, and the happy people rejoice in all that makes their lives so good.

 

[roland]

Or a contrarian view: Christmas is when people spend money they don't have to buy presents for people they don't like, who in turn will hate the presents.
Then come January they will sweat blood over how they are going to pay the credit card bill.

In between there's Christmas Day when families who don't much like one another get together anyway, drink too much, and when Uncle Sol makes a pass at a two generations younger distant relative, all hell breaks loose.

It's a time when emotions of every kind are heightened. The sad and lonely are more miserable, and the happy people rejoice in all that makes their lives so good.

Ah Julia, such a bundle of joy, may Santa fill your stockings with lots of cool stuff.

Maybe we should all buy presents for ourselves, wrap and label as desired and let someone else select from under the tree to hand them back to their respective owners.... Everyone happy!