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Smooth Banter Radio with Burgs and Youngy

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DeepState said:
... Can you drop by and collect me at some stage? I'm already wondering what MacGuvver would do in this situation. Right now I have a crystal radio set, a watch battery and a fork I took from the cafeteria.
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It'll take a month of Sundays to get through the red tape bureaucracy!
Suggest you take wood carving lessons!!







And hide the fork!
 
burglar said:
It'll take a month of Sundays to get through the red tape bureaucracy!
Suggest you take wood carving lessons!!



View attachment 59963



And hide the fork!
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...so, you're just going to leave me hanging...again. Just like that time in Barbados when I shaved off your right eyebrow.
 
burglar said:
No, no. I intend to get around tuit, ... even-chew-a-lee!
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I gotta get out of this place. There's beach to enjoy, 180km bike rides to do and, mostly, a radio station to kick off.

So I do a MacGuyver.

Step 1: Organise Chloroform. I was assigned painting duty. I grab acetone. I get told to wash the toilets. Screw them, I get bleach. I go to the cafeteria, I get ice. I need two glasses. No problem...cafeteria. I've got to create a make-shift separation funnel, no problem. Bring a glass to metal work and drill a hole at the bottom of the glass.

Step 2: Prepare rat. The cafeteria is my treasure trove. I keep a piece of cheese. On dishwashing duty, I find a rat and pocket it. I grab a thick elastic band from the mail room whilst sorting mail. I grab a new supply of dental floss by just saying I ran out. I get a bit of stiff wire from metal work and store it internally until I return to my cell. I wrap the elastic band around the belly of the rat. I tie two long lengths of dental floss to it. One on the left side, one on the right. I have a rat harness to control direction. I hook up some cheese to the fork I already had and attach the fork to the rat with the wire. Now we have an engine that wants to go forward but can be turned.

Step 3: Make chloroform. Check out the net. You'll get the idea. I dab a huge amount on a sock and attach that to the back of the rat where it won't inhale so much as to get groggy.

Step 4: Get keys to exit jail. During the afternoon exercise break, the guards are half asleep with the dozy heat. I approach the front entrance gates (1 of 2). I release the rat and direct it to give the guard on duty a damned fine dose of chloroform. I then direct the rat to grab the keys off the desk. These get stuck on the fork and move with the rat. I pull the little thing through the gate and I grab the keys.

Step 5: Unlock gate.

Step 6: Give the guard another shot of chloroform. Grab his clothes and get out of my orange onesie. Take some cash.

Step 7: Open outer gate.

Step 8: Call Burglar. I'll meet you at Teddy's Bigger Burgers at 539 Kailua Rd in an hour. I'll be the one in the poor fitting guard uniform that smells of chloroform residue having a Monster Double Combo. Release the rat.

We have got a radio station to re-start. I still have my crystal radio transmitter and watch battery. More than enough.
 
DeepState said:
I gotta get out of this place ...
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First time you said this was in Barbados!
Then you said it Caracas (crackers!)


Now this place.

Each time your worse off!




Please consider the 5 pee's!

Prior
Planning
Prevents
Poor
Performance
 
burglar said:
First time you said this was in Barbados!
Then you said it Caracas (crackers!)


Now this place.

Each time your worse off!




Please consider the 5 pee's!

Prior
Planning
Prevents
Poor
Performance
Click to expand...

Ok, so I've got an issue with commitment...and planning....and other stuff. Are you coming or not?

Life's a bit of a ramble. Might as well go with it, eh?

 
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HOT PROPERTIES
What's new in Hawaii Real Estate?
We have a whole new meaning to the term "Cooling Down Period"!

Source>>hawaii+lava+flow




 
Señor Youngie, where are you?
I have sent two boats and a helicopter to your last known position.



A slow-moving lava flow on Hawaii's Big Island has incinerated its first home since a stream of molten rock began creeping towards the village of Pahoa in June.

hawaii-volcano-incinerates-first-home
 

Hey Burgs!! Sorry, my phone went flat.

I'm prepping up for a meeting with some financiers so we can buy suitable equipment to get back on air. How much do you think they'll give me for a pair of red budgie smugglers?
 
Burgs, there was a glut of red budgie smugglers......so we didn't get a lot for the pair I had. No matter, I bought a kit to build an FM transmitter. It looks like this, except we'll have to run it on a watch battery because I don't have enough for one of those Duracell things...they've gained some cachet after Wazza took them up with some pocket change.



Whatever. We're back Burgs, we're back....
 
Aloha Burgs, hang loose

That was a wonderful masterpiece to kick off transmission for Radio Smooth Banter (Hawaii). With the transmission power we can currently generate, I'd say we have a reach of maybe two properties on each side of our current location if they were listening closely. However, the Mauna Kea radio telescope can pick us up loud and clear. They have an unlimited broadband plan and we are now live and happening on internet radio (access via iHeartRADIO in a message to our sponsors). Crystal clear.

Burgs, sometimes we have just got to turn up and good stuff just happens. A few short weeks ago and I was harnessing rats whilst plotting an escape from jail. Now, we are back in the radio business. Justice.

What's next Burgs?

 
burglar said:
You're taking in laundry ... in Lichtenstein?!
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Uhhhh. Well, I was doing some internet banking via my Lichtenstein portal. Converting Bitcoin into Rubble and then Yuan ... you know. But I'm actually right here with you in Hawaii and will be at the track very soon.
 
Maybe we can raise funds by selling prestige trackside tickets and allow the viewers to come walk in the 'pits' and listen to our strategies etc.

 
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